Title: When you love someone
Author: hot-chick down under
Topic: House M.D.
URL: When you love someone – Chapter Two
Critiqued by Frozenpoodlemeat
This week we begin with chapter two, which is called “Peacemaker is my middle name”. I read ahead in the story and realized that I had apparently not looked at the tags for this story. It is tagged as a drama/romance, which I can see because there is drama and romance. I had not looked to see who the romance was between, but so far it seems like Cameron and Chase. No, that’s not the right answer. It’s tagged as Cameron/House. Oh, god. I haven’t seen anything in this story so far that would lead me to believe that Cameron should be with House in this story.
Today we have a bit of fanart from Mass Effect, the source material for that endlessly terrible fanfic Herr W. is riffing. From what I understand, this is one of the
bad good guys.
Author: Jckash03 (Now permanently referred to as Jackass)
Media: Television / Movie
Topic: Dragon Ball Z
Genre: Suspense / Romance
URL: Control – Chapter Fourteen
Critiqued by Lyle
Submitted by Blessed8be
Hello again! Welcome back to chapter fourteen of the DBZ fic called “Control” where nothing seems to make a whole lot of fucking sense. At. All. Especially with regards to canon. Double-especially with regards to real-life happenings like crime investigation. Let’s sum-up what we saw during the first half of this chapter then we’ll move along.
Gohan has a hissy-fit about having to raise his brother and take care of his mom, thus preventing – in his mind – him from being able to achieve his full potential. Nevermind that he has a Ph.D. They totally held him back. Trunks meets with Mr. Officer, who probably hails from the same CSI training as Mr. Khaki Suit for how well he knows how to do his job. Trunks denies knowing anything about the death of Marron but later admits to Bulma that he did kill her. This has no effect on Bulma but to berate her son and daughter – who is absent from this conversation – for ruining Bulma and Vegeta’s marriage. The fic officially turns into a poorly scripted episode of “Days of Our Lives.” All we need now is for someone to fall into a coma for a few chapters and miraculously pull through, falling madly in love with their doctor, who just happens to be their sister’s husband’s more attractive twin brother. And he’ll talk with an Australian accent for not reason but because it’s “hawt.”
Title: The Animagus Predator
Media: Book / Movie
Topic: Harry Potter / Aliens/Predator Cross-Over
Genre: Romance / Sci-Fi
URL: The Animagus Predator – Chapter Three
Critiqued by Ghostcat
My dear sweet Patrons, I am so very sorry. I had hoped to finish out The Animagus Predator today but after much thought and figurative hot-oil wrestling with myself I’ve decided to split the remaining portion in half. There is just a little too much to cover and I want to give the Jungle of Death the attention it deserves.
Oh, you’ll see. But first, the recap!
Harry Stu, who is the most Stu of all the Harrys, was goofing off during Transfiguration class because he’s a bored douchecanoe. Professor McGonagall asked him to stay afterwards for a little conference, but rather than kicking his ass out of her class she fawned over him like a fangirl. It is also revealed that the extremely bored Harry Stu, having learned everything in the world, has been signing up for extra classes, requested a Time Turner, and will be taking the NEWTs early – even though as a seventh year student would already be taking them that year anyway.
We left Harry Stu and the professor as the teacher-student conference went completely off the rails and he decided to reveal his vast inheritance to McGonagall, so that sounds like a good place to begin.
Title: Parallel Realities
Media: Video Game
Topic: Mass Effect
URL:Parallel Realities – Chapter Nine
URL: Parallel Realities – Chapter Ten
Critiqued by Herr Wozzeck
Hello children, and welcome back to this snarking of Parallel Realities. Today in our snarking is…
Well, it’s actually another time where we can burn through multiple chapters in one installment. Why? Well, Chapter 9 is another short-ish chapter, and Chapter 10 is pretty much nothing but plot regurgitation. But you know what the great thing is?
Once we get to Chapter 10, we’re going to be dealing with five chapters of nothing but plot missions for ME1. So you know what that means, right?
In a few chapters, we’ll be done with the ME1 arc, and thus we’ll be about a third of the way through Parallel Realities. Yay!
Title: call of duty:the untold zombie chronicels
Author: insane doctor and judgmentdragon25
Media: Video Game/Movie
Topic: Call of Duty/Land Before Time Cross-Over
Genre: None Listed
URL: call of duty:the untold zombie chronicels – Chapter Eight
Critiqued by TacoMagic
Another Wednesday and another chapter of call of duty:the untold zombie cronicels; please try to contain your excitement. We’re still clipping along nicely here, this will make the third straight week where I can do a whole chapter in one sitting. Next week will be like that too, as Chapter Nine is really short from the look of it.
Last time on call of duty:the untold zombie chronicels: Team Stu fought more zombie raptors that had found the convieniently forgotten land bridge to the island. Luckily, Chomper forgot to wear his flying Death Machine Armor to the fight, which allowed a contrived plot device to assist in getting his parents removed from the story. Remember kids, parents have no business being in fanfiction; they just load down the story. So anyway, the quantum flux vomits up another land bridge and Team Stu is able to flee across it to some temporary safety. They blow it up behind them with some C4 because, apparently, they had only one tactical clean-nuke and they already used it on The Great Valley.
As this is a fresh chapter, it’s time to crank up the ol’ comma detector.
Title: Harry Potter Meets the BabySitters Club
Media: Book / Movie
Topic: Harry Potter / The Baby-Sitter’s Club
Genre: Family / Friendship
URL: Harry Potter Meets the BabySitters Club – Chapter Three
Critiqued by Addicted Reader
Hello, dear readers! We’re back with chapter three of “Harry Potter Meets the BabySitters Club.” In case you’ve forgotten (and I don’t blame you), in chapter one Mrs. Figg babynapped Harry Potter from the Dursleys’ doorstep and took him to Gringotts Bank. There, she and the head goblin decided that she would adopt him and Neville Longbottom, Harry’s cousin through their mothers and also newly orphaned. In chapter two, Mrs. Figg visited her vault and then we all fell asleep as Mrs. Figg and the goblins discussed finances, estimating how much she would need to move to the U.S. with the boys.