Title: A Jedi’s Destiny: Episode I: Rise of the Sith
Topic: Star Wars / Land Before Time
Genre: Sci Fi / Adventure
URL: A Jedi’s Destiny: Episode I: Rise of the Sith – Chapter 12
Critiqued by TacoMagic
Hello patrons! Happy Halloween and welcome back to Wednesdays with Taco. Sorry I missed last week, FPM and myself have a new baby that arrived two weeks ago and we’ve had our hands full coping with everything. And, since I’m pretty tired all the time these days, my posts will likely be shorter than usual until the child starts sleeping through the night. My apologies for that. I also apologize for not having anything exciting or special for Halloween this year. But, all is not lost. You’ll all still be getting something extremely scary: more Markus.
We have now reached the marathon chapter of A Jedi’s Destiny. This chapter alone accounts for nearly 1/3 of the total word-count of the fic. I’m beside myself with pure joy.
But hey, a chapter this long has got to have something happen in it, right? Right? Please?
Recap? Sure, why not. In the last chapter Boba Fett came to the planet so that Markus could be bad-ass and defeat him in a drawn-out and overly cliché battle scene that involved no small amount of teleporting and Hollywood physics. Small wonder. By the end of the chapter, Markus had captured Boba and was planning on doing weird and kinky things to his unconscious body.
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This is a rather adorable version of everyone’s favorite bloodsucker, even the bats fluttering around him are pretty cute. (I’m kinda partial to bats.)
While I’m only passing familiar with the Call of Duty franchise, I do not think these ladies are adequately dressed for the situations depicted in the games.
Greetings and salutations, beautiful and/or handsome Patrons! We’ve reached my favorite part of the fic – the end! I will be so happy to see the back of this monster.
I’m going over my notes from the last chapters, but it mostly seems to be various profanities and the word “wrong” written over and over again. There’s also a partially eaten straight-jacket that I’m rather fuzzy about. (Must have been one of the skunks.) I do recall that there were a bachelor and bachelorette parties and then the wedding, after which Cyborg started yelling about how there was something wrong with one of the babies. I think that covers all of the basics.
Even though the author seems to have given up on crafting anything that resembles a cohesive narrative, there’s still two more chapters of this stuff to wade through. They are a bit longer than previous chapters, so much so that I thought about doing them singly, but I really don’t want to spend another week with this tripe so today’s riff is super-sized for your reading enjoyment.
Let’s get started.
Title: Parallel Realities
Media: Video Game
Topic: Mass Effect
URL: Parallel Realities: Chapter 33
Critiqued by Herr Wozzeck
Hello, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome back to this installment of Parallel Realities!
Well, last time, we ended the chapter with the reveal that Stupard had called in some back-up for the suicide mission. Really, do I have to say what’s wrong with that bit from a narrative standpoint? And from an in-story standpoint, it doesn’t really make sense since I thought Stupard was trying to downplay the involvement of the parallel galaxy in this galaxy’s affairs.
Well, either way, we’re stuck with it, so there’s nothing we can do about that. So today, we’re going to attempt to tackle the Suicide Mission in one go.
Let’s not waste any more time.
I don’t care that it’s not realistic and that the scale is all wrong – those are Jedi fighting on top of a dinosaur. ‘Nuff said.
I found this whilst I was looking for Bambi fanart, but I think perhaps Bambi (or the artist) may have accidentally eaten some of the “special” mushrooms.