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Generic winter solstice greetings, Patrons!
I hope you are enjoying whatever holiday you may or may not celebrate. Since I’ve finished up with my last fic, I thought I’d follow my pattern from last year and go looking for a holiday-themed oneshots. And, lucky for you, I found quite a few! These two from the Danny Phantom series are both super-short, so today’s a two-fer post!
“WOO-HOO! Double trouble!”
:sigh: Also, Syl is back. And I’m pretty sure she’s drunk.
“Well, your bathtub is full of eggnog and I don’t want it to go to waste.” :sips from giant novelty mug shaped like a reindeer:
:deep, long-suffering sigh: Great.
Just a quick re-cap of the premise for the source materials, since I’ve covered fics from this section before I’m not going to go too in-depth. The animated show follows the adventures of Danny Fenton, who (thanks to a malfunction in one of his parents’ ghost-catching gadgets) can transform into a ghost form called Danny Phantom. Hijinks ensue.
Depends on the fanfic.
A word of warning; while both of these fics are technically Christmas-themed, they are not light and frothy drabbles. Prepare yourself for extremely serious subject matter.
:Syl reaches across the desk and places a festively blinking Santa hat on Ghostie’s head:
…Thanks, that really sets the tone that I was going for.
Title: No One in this World is Perfect
Author: Draco Malfoy is Blonde
Media: Books / Movie
Topic: Harry Potter / The Great Gatsby
URL: No One in this World is Perfect
Critiqued by Addicted Reader
::Addicted Reader wanders absent-mindedly into the Riffing Room::
Oh, there are Patrons here! I guess I should do a riff. Hold on, let me go find something.
::starts rummaging through ff.net::
Well, last time we were in the Harry Potter crossover section, specifically the bottom of the list where the canons with exactly one crossover story are listed. Let’s keep looking there.
::scrolls for a while::
Oh, Great Gatsby! That must be that odd little underwear fic from a while ago.
Huh, it’s something else.
::spends a while clicking links and mumbling something about dashes and underscores::
Ok, so there are two listings for “Great Gatsby” under HP crossover. There are four fics, including the underwear one, under one listing and just this one under the other. The fic is short and the summary presents a premise worth looking at, so here goes:
Short conversation between Jay Gatsby and Severus Snape; because women are fickle or dead. (Gatsby didn’t die.)
Hello, dear Patrons!
I was browsing through my pile-o-fail the other day and thought to myself; “You know what I haven’t looked for recently? Twitanic fics!”
Because sometimes my brain really, really hates me and wants me to suffer. So why should I suffer alone?
For those of you who are newcomers in the Library, “Twitanic” is a name that numerous fanfic authors have given fics that blend together that town bicycle of fics, The Twilight Saga, with the 1997 film Titanic. This one is the fourth such fic I have worked on. The fics are completely unrelated, yet the exact same title keeps popping up. ‘Tis passing strange, it is.
This particular Twitanic is quite short in comparison to all of the others I’ve worked on, just a quick little oneshot to slake my thirst for this strange little side-fandom and give me a chance to wear my History Nerd hat. Let’s take a look at the summary, shall we?
Edward and Bella catch a ride on the Romantic Titanic for a Honeymoon right after the wedding in Breaking Dawn. They have a wonderful time till disaster strikes! Can Edward save Bella from the freezing Atlantic Ocean? Please R&R!
I don’t care if you tack “romantic” on to the name, if you call your cruise ship “Titanic” then you are just poking the hornets’ nest of fate with a sharp stick made of your own hubris. Unless this is the original Titanic, in which case – Wow. You aren’t do a very good job establishing the setting or time period, since the wreck and the wedding take place decades apart from each other and you’ve done nothing to link them together.
On to the fic!
Title: Philosopher of Earth
Topic: My Little Pony
Genre: Tragedy / Adventure / Sad / Human / Gore
URL: Chapter Three
Critiqued by Crowbar
Oh hey-ho, everyone! This is The Magnificent Crowbar, and I am finally back with the next chapter of this… Trite.
Oh, and the last one was quite a while ago, so here’s a refresher.
Hoo boy, I should not feel even a little bit happy about this.
Anyways, here’s Philosopher of Earth, chapter 3! Enjoy.
*A painter secretly locks and barricades all exits from the viewing room*
Title: The Rope Shrine Maiden’s Diary -Fatal Frame-/Blood stained sisters
Media: Video Game
Topic: Fatal Frame
Genre: Tragedy/Horror and Hurt/Comfort
URL: The Rope Shrine Maiden’s Diary -Fatal Frame-, Blood stained sisters
Critiqued by SC, Auren and L. Ederlein Salthorne
Hello, and welcome back to the Library of the Damned! I’m your host, SC, and this is the unfortunate continuation of my “Until I Get My Riffing List Back” campaign.
So, I figured, since I’m still stuck doing this, let’s take a trip to the horror genre side of fanfiction.net and see what we can find!
Initially, I was gonna do a Silent Hill fic, because I love making everybody suffer by looking at the disfigured abominations you fight in Silent Hill, but my recent Abyss oneshot set my mind to another game series I was also familiar with, so I decided to go there instead.
—FIC CONTAINS DISTURBING CONTENT—
Hello, my dearest Patrons!
We have reached that most wonderful of days, the end of a badfic! There are several other zombie Smurf fics in this author’s listings, however, so I might take a whack at them as well. I haven’t decided yet.
Honestly, I have no idea why this chapter exists. The last chapter wrapped up everything in a bland little package; the fastest zombie outbreak ever was just as quickly suppressed, leaving eighty percent of the village’s population dead and Chernov a hero. Toss in some groin-based humor and roll credits. This chapter is basically like the fic’s appendix, only in the “useless vestigial organ” sense rather than the usual literary one.
Let’s get to it, then!
—FIC CONTAINS DISTURBING CONTENT—
Welcome once more to another chapter of this zombie Smurf odyssey – now with Exploding Zombies™!
It’s just a matter of time before that becomes a thing. And then the royalties will come flooding in for Ghostie!
Let’s see; what happened last time?
:flips through notes:
Chernov attempted to revive Handy’s corpse without repairing any of the substantial damage or replacing Handy’s missing blood, so despite the explosion denoting a successful experiment it was a failure. A short period of time later Handy did indeed revive, but as a zombie. Zombie Handy attacks Chernov, which is the first sensible thing that’s happened in this fic, and the green bastard traps the zombie in the bathroom before shooting him in the head. Chernov then goes to sleep cuddling Sassette like she’s a teddy bear. After breakfast the next morning, Chernov drags the headless corpse to Papa’s place and they take the body out into the forest to bury it. At some point an insect bites the corpse and then bites another Smurf, thus beginning the zombie plague. Because explosions are contagious now.
To the fic!