2856: Listening To You – Chapters 4-6

Title: Listening To You
Author: heyheywhatcanido
Media: Music
Topic: Tommy
Genre: Angst / Hurt/Comfort / Unhelpfully Specific AO3 Tags
URL: Chapters 4, 5, and 6
Critiqued by BatJamags

Hello once again, patrons. I’m your host BatJamags, and from me, you get opinions. Like the fact that this fic sucks. I just realized I should’ve been doing something seasonal. I’m going to count this because of:

All right, so it’s not especially festive. Cut me some slack here, I’m trying to make excuses.

Last time, Tommy Walker wandered around as his senses faded in and out until someone who could help found him and took him to a hospital, but then just kind of decided to be nonspecifically mean to him instead. He escaped, and then wandered around as his senses faded in and out until someone who could help found him and took him to a disturbingly non-Euclidean corner of the Formless Void that certainly could have been a hospital, but then just kind of decided to be nonspecifically mean to him instead. We left off as he escaped.

I left out some of the “better” twists and turns, but honestly, who cares.

Actually, the Who should’ve used Who Cares as an album title. It would’ve at least been more descriptive of whatever the hell that thing they released in 2020 was than just making it a self-titled.

Anyway, onto Chapter Four’s summary:

I imagine Beatrice as Tina Aumont but with short hair :)

Author, if you aren’t going to put any work into your descriptions, I’m certainly not going to research them. >X[

Read the rest of this entry »

2855: Listening To You – Chapters 1-3

Title: Listening To You
Author: heyheywhatcanido
Media: Music
Topic: Tommy
Genre: Angst / Hurt/Comfort / It’s AO3 so there are also some oddly specific and unhelpful tags slapped on as well
URL: Chapters 1, 2, and 3
Critiqued by BatJamags

Hello once again, patrons! I’m your host, BatJamags, and I’m back with an angsty little microfic called “Listening To You.” You are, unfortunately, about to get the story.

So, I have a habit of sort of fixating on one musical artist at a time. And… my current focus is Who?

Large Warship the Owl: Hoo.

Yes, exactly.

Large Warship the Owl: Hoo hoo. Hoo hoo.

What do you mean, those jokes stopped being funny decades ago?

All right, all right, enough clowning. I mean these guys:

Basically, they’re a band that included the guitarist who literally invented hard rock, the singer who did the “YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAH!” scream you probably know best from the CSI meme, the drummer who inspired Animal from the Muppets because he was basically a human cartoon character, and the bass guitarist who was stealth the coolest of the four in spite of all that.

We do our best to avoid real person fic here because dude, that’s weird even for us. But what I’ve found for today is not a real person fic (other than an ambiguous borderline case in the second chapter that goes nowhere; we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it). The Who’s most successful album was Tommy, which is a rock opera and thus has its own plot and characters, written by the band’s guitarist and main songwriter Pete Townshend. It’s intended as sort of a metaphor for Townshend’s comparatively obscure religious beliefs, but can still at least be followed from plot point to plot point without the background reading.

Read the rest of this entry »

2550: Sacrifice – Oneshot

Title: Sacrifice
Author: Emma-Alberta
Media: TV Show
Topic: BBC Sherlock
Genre: Suspense/Angst
URL: Sacrifice
Critiqued by Em Kay

Greetings, Librarians and patrons! I’m Em, your guest snarker today. I’ll be riffing Sacrifice, a two chapter, Suspense/Angst tagged Sherlock fic by Emma-Alberta.

I don’t believe BBC’s Sherlock series has been brought up in the Library before, but I’m not going to go full SC Wiki. Since this is a short fic, I’ll do more of a lazy, Taco-style, Need To Know Pamphlet and throw in relevant details as needed.

First off, Sherlock Holmes is a fictional British detective created by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle in a series of mostly short stories that were written and set in the late 1800’s/early 1900’s. Told through the voice of his assistant, Dr. John Watson, they show Sherlock as a master of logical reasoning, forensic science, and observation during investigations for various clients as well as Scotland Yard.

There have been bajillions of literary, film, and television adaptations featuring the characters, the latest of which is the BBC television series, Sherlock. In this version, some of the original stories are adapted and set in modern day London.

This fic was written and posted just four days after the Season 1 finale, “The Great Game”, aired in 2010 with an update the next day.

Now let’s take a look at the summary.

my view what happens after the episode ‘Great Game’ ends… angst because im like that. sorry if i spell Moriarty’s name wrong… i have no idea how to spell it haha

Terrible grammar, missing and misused punctuation, and topped off with a dose of too-lazy-to-Google-ness? This looks promising.

Read the rest of this entry »


2514: Mass Murder Effect: The First War Crime (Was Committed By The Protagonists) — Chapter 9 Part 1

Title: Mass Effect: The First War
Author: ProfFartBurger
Media: Video Game
Topic: Mass Effect
Genre: Adventure/Sci-Fi
URL: Chapter 9
Critiqued by AdmiralSakai

-WARNING(?)-
Today’s riff touches on issues relating to the regulation and use of weapons of mass destruction. This is partially a fairly standard flamebait warning because I am aware the topic could become contentious (see Call of Duty, Black Hell Ops, previously), but is also somewhat unusual in that I am willing to discuss the topic in more detail in the comments- there just wasn’t room, or relevancy for it in the riff proper.

Hello hello all you patrons, and welcome back to Mass Effect: The First War.

Last time, the turians finally got their bony asses in gear and bombed New York, by firing at some kind of human ship in orbit and missing. This resulted in the usual screeching from the OUTRAAAAGE!!!! Society, and… that was about it.

Oh yeah, and then, like literally tens of thousands of those dreadful SPARTAN knockoffs finally arrived. I can only imagine the cerulean carnage they‘re going to wreak on the unfortunate turians, assuming they ever actually get around to landing.

first_war_bb_9

Read the rest of this entry »


2441: Halloween Oneshots – Spooptoberfest Part One

Title: The halloween after
Author: NotJustOneFandome
Media: Movie
Topic: Halloween
Genre: Tragedy/Angst but to music
URL: The halloween after
Critiqued by TacoMagic and Eliza

Hello, patrons!  Welcome back to the continuing Spooptoberfestivities!  Today we’ll be adding two more little oneshots to the Library’s pile of spooky, spooky failure.  The first is a Halloween oneshot, not just the holiday, but also the titular movie taking place on the holiday!  Though, honestly, to call this thing a fanfic is tarnishing the good name of such epic masterpieces of “untold zombie chronicels.”

You’ll understand why this one is bad pretty much right away when I show you the summary.

Song fanfic

That’s the entire summary.  And it’s a tragedy/angst fic, so who wants to bet we get something with either My Chemical Romance or Evanescence.  Brace yourselves, patrons, we’re going in hot!

Read the rest of this entry »