2644: First contact war and Delta Twosix — One-Shots

Title: First contact war
Author: Matty414
Media: Video Game
Topic: Mass Effect
Genre: Sci-Fi
URL: Chapter 1, Chapter 2
Critiqued by AdmiralSakai

Hello hello all you patrons! It seems like just yesterday that we were blundering around in Myst Effect before dipping ever-so-briefly back into First War, which is doubly odd because to me at least the segment of First War before Myst Effect felt like an interminable death march.

Regardless, it’s time for one-shots again, and I figured why not go for some non-Stumanity Mass Effect alternate-contact-war drivel? Here’s the inventively-titled First contact war by Matty414!

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2640: Mass Murder Effect: The First War Crime (Was Committed by the Protagonists) — Chapter 14 Part 3

Title: Mass Effect: The First War
Author: ProfFartBurger
Media: Video Game
Topic: Mass Effect
Genre: Adventure/Sci-Fi
URL: Chapter 14
Critiqued by AdmiralSakai

Hello hello all you patrons, and welcome back to Mass Effect: The First War.

Last time, the Stumans showed up over Palaven and a highly daybooked attritional slugfest of a naval battle took place, resulting in the complete obliteration of the Turian Navy. What a surprise.

Also, in their continuing effort to avoid provoking the Citadel into the full military response they should really by all rights already be engaging, some of those stupid Spartan knockoffs invaded the Citadel again, killed the Spectres providing security to the Council Chamber (again), and kidnapped the Councilors.

We left off just as the humans were launching a full-scale orbital barrage against Palaven intended to destroy major population centers -but not using any nuclear weapons, because that would be too indiscriminate for some reason- in preparation for what is sure to be a confusing, edgy, self-righteous and boring ground invasion.

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2636: Mass Murder Effect: The First War Crime (Was Committed by the Protagonists) — Chapter 14 Part 2

-WARNING-
While not to such a degree as the previous segment, this one continues to contain potential flamebait in the form of War On Terror tactica talking-points that can’t really be addressed without to some degree bringing up people and movements still active in the political sphere today.

Title: Mass Effect: The First War
Author: ProfFartBurger
Media: Video Game
Topic: Mass Effect
Genre: Adventure/Sci-Fi
URL: Chapter 14
Critiqued by AdmiralSakai

Hello hello all you patrons, and welcome back to Mass Effect: The First War.

Last time, Daddy McStu employed unnecessarily brutal, unnecessarily elaborate, and ultimately rather ineffective torture tactics on some random turian POW, and there was a great deal of confusion about whether the Codex entries that are bloating up an alarming amount of this chapter are subject to in-universe censorship or not. Also a bunch of Pointless Panic about Element Zero contamination happened (including another invocation of the ever-mysterious “Terraforming Discs”), and the preparations for the strategically highly confusing invasion of Palaven marched on to their inevitable stupid conclusion.

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It occurs to me that this bingo board has now gone through thirteen distinct revisions. Nearly one every single chapter.

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2642: Mass Murder Effect: The First War Crime (Was Committed by the Protagonists) — Chapter 14 Part 1

-WARNING-
This chapter includes some scenes of fairly brutal torture. It’s not as pervy or gross as most of the creepypasta we’ve riffed (indeed, there’s little to no actual description of anything at all), and unlike the previous one this chapter doesn’t make any explicit comparisons to any IRL historical/political entities, but it is pretty damn difficult to riff it without addressing topics fairly closely related.

Title: Mass Effect: The First War
Author: ProfFartBurger
Media: Video Game
Topic: Mass Effect
Genre: Adventure/Sci-Fi
URL: Chapter 14
Critiqued by AdmiralSakai

Hello hello all you patrons, and welcome back to Mass Effect: The First War.

Last chapter, Grand Moff Whyney reiterated his nonsensical strategy for bullying the Citadel Council into submission on Alliance-wide television, using a painfully contorted World War II analogy that backfired on him in every conceivable way. And then a racist krogan stereotype fought the knockoff-Spartans in the Wards after they for some reason decided to sneak into his house. He got killed, of course, and then some random Citadel residents felt the need to recap the events of the chapter and promulgate unfounded conspiracy theories that the humans are actually protheans.

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2638: Myst Effect – One-Shot

Title: Myst Effect
Author: TheDistressedOne
Media: Video Games
Topic: Myst / Mass Effect
Genre: Sci-Fi / Adventure
URL: Chapter 1
Critiqued by AdmiralSakai

Hello hello all you patrons! Today our break from the morass that is Mass Effect: The First War brings us to a canon I don’t think has ever been featured on the Library before- the Myst series.

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