1549: Teen titians: The weirdest foe – Chapter 3

Title: Teen titians: The weirdest foe
Author: Yami Joeys Dog
Media: TV
Topic: Teen Titans
Genre: “Humor”
URL: Chapter 3
Critiqued by Ghostcat



Standard greetings, Patrons!

I’m back with another chapter of what I’m foolishly hoping doesn’t turn out to be some sort of strangely specific fetish-fic – but it probably is because that’s the way my luck usually runs.


Last chapter there was much incontinence and teenagers acting like toddlers – because Humor!, I guess – and that was about it. It would be lovely if this chapter offered us more than literal toilet humor, but I’m not expecting much.

 Warning: The following story is written by me, so I think that should be warning enough. Starfire: Actually I think you need to add some other stuff to that. Raven: Unless you wish to get sued for everything you own. Gary: What? My play station and my comic books? Oh and about 10 bucks on a good day?

This feels oddly familiar.

Beast boy: *sigh* Guess I’ll do the disclaimer.. Gary does not own Teen Titians, and frankly, that’s a good thing for us. Robin: This is just a fan fiction so nobody please sue him. Cyborg: Now Gary, back to that idea about me being king of the world. Rest of the titians: O_O Gary: How many time do I have to tell you, I’m not writing that! Any way, onto the story!

Wait just a damned second … :checks previous riffs: This is the intro for the first chapter!

:scrolls through fic:

This chapter begins with the text of the first two chapters!


Read the rest of this entry »

1548: Normandy High 2: Cryogenic Boogaloo – Chapter Five

Title: Subject 23: Cryonics
Author: The Eezoman
Media:  Video Games
Topic: Mass Effect
Genre: Adventure/Romance
URL: Subject 23: Cryonics: Chapter 5
Critiqued by Herr Wozzeck

Hello folks, and welcome back to Subject 23: Cryonics! It’s time for more stupid with the world’s most epic Gary Stu!

And what will happen this time? Well, hopefully we’ll finally break this stupid fucking “can’t spit it out” bullshit that has been a hallmark of both these fics, right?

*breathes in*

Let’s find out, shall we?

Read the rest of this entry »

1547: Heroes and Villains – Chapter Seven, Part Two

Title: Heroes and Villains
Author: Horrible’s Igor
Media: Television / Movies
Topic: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer / Kitchen Sink
Genre: Supernatural/Drama
URL: Heroes and Villains
Critiqued by TacoMagic and Eliza

Heyo, patrons!  Welcome back to Heroes and Villains.  As luck would have it, last week something actually happened!  Somewhat.  It was stupidly executed and mired in lots of unnecessary dialogue, but I’ll take it.  I’ll hand it off to Eliza to elucidate.

“Elsa poisoned Buffy and Jimmy with a PCC chocolate cake!”

See!  It was a thing!  And it totally happened!

Otherwise, the first half of the chapter was relatively devoid of anything interesting.

“Other than Olaf secretly being Solid Snake and Sam Fischer rolled into one, bubbly package.”

Or maybe the villains are just every bit as incompetent as we think they are and Olaf is just bumbling around without them noticing.

“I like my version better.”

Read the rest of this entry »

1546: My Inner Life: Chapter 1 Part 2

Title: My Inner Life
Author: Link’s Queen
Media: Video Game
Topic: Legend of Zelda
Genre: None
URL: Whole Story
Critiqued by Erttheking


Nora: Ert?

Ert: Pardon me. Not sure if I made the right career choice, feeling college was a waste of time, feeling like I can’t make much headway into my field of choice, starting to wish I had studied a field that I hated but it paid well, concerned I might be a failure in life. And on top of all of this Donald Trump might have an unhealthy amount of influence in my life for the next four years. You know. Just got some stuff on my mind.

Goeth: Why is he having a mid-life crisis when he’s not even twenty-three yet?

Ert: BECAUSE I PICKED A LOUSY TIME TO BE BORN! *Inhales* Go to your happy place, go to your happy place.

Nora: Er. Anyway, while Ert does that, let’s pick up where we left off. We learned that LQ was probably not using the homophobic version of queer, so we’re dropping that counter. Also, Ms. Sue traveled to Hyrule from the land of undeveloped, sold undeveloped to king undeveloped

I returned to the inside of my wagon and prepared a hot bath.

Goeth: A bath. In a wagon. See, we did some research and it turns out people did bathe regularly in the Middle Ages. But I seriously doubt this woman would be lugging around a tub with her.

Ert: Kind of telling that the story seems to glaze over how exactly she’s doing this.

Read the rest of this entry »

1545: A Daughter – Chapter Two

Title: A Daughter
Author: Lady Lilith La Belle
Media: Books / Movie
Topic: Harry Potter
Genre: Romance/Angst
URL: Chapter Two
Critiqued by Lyle

Good morning, everyone!  Welcome back to “A Daughter.”  Last time we met, Cellophane was sorted into Slytherin.  That’s seriously the only thing that happened.

*sets the buzzer out on the desk*

This thing is up to 15 and we’re only starting the second chapter.  It’s a bit longer than the previous installments, but a good chunk of today is just the lyrics to “Nights in White Satin”.

My apologies to The Moody Blues.

Read the rest of this entry »