Well, I’m back with another chapter of utter wrongness, cherished Patrons. In case you missed the last chapter, let me give you the highlights.
It’s been two months since the sinking and Rose is now a waitress in New York City living with a faceless girl named Anna, whom I believe to be a Bella clone. After complaints of nausea, not to uncommon given the sanitation standards of the day, Rose and Anna-Bella go to a doctor to confirm (somehow) that Rose is pregnant. The fic then skips across the country to Jack, who is moping about in a sparkle-funk because he’s worried about Rose. Carlisle agrees to go check on Rose to get Jack to stop starving himself, telling him that he may be able to see her in seven months. Carlisle then decides to take Edward with him to New York, even though he whines during the entire two-week trip.
Topic: Chronicles of Narnia/Twilight
Critiqued by Herr Wozzeck
Hello, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome back to the Library.
*wipes his forehead *
Believe me, I’m also really relieved that I am done with Parallel Realities. Seriously, that fic was so shitty that it was incredible how bad it was. That it gathered the following it did is even crazier, if you ask me. But whatever, it’s done now, and now I can move to other things.
And the first thing we’re going to move on to? Why, it’s one of the creepiest fanfics I’ve ever read! And it’ll also be the first time I’ve ever snarked at a Twilight fanfic, too! And oh yeah, let’s not forget about Narnia, that too. Yep, it’s a fic about the Pevensies, with a specific focus on Lucy Pevensie. Huh… I don’t know if I should be charmed of frightened by the prospect of Lucy Pevensie getting along really well with Edward Cullen. That’s… uh… yeah.
So let’s get to it, shall we?
This week I’ve got another brief one-shot starring a fast evolving Stu. Since I own, and have beaten all the Metroid games, I felt somewhat qualified to take on a Metroid fic. Unfortunately for me, this fic has almost nothing to do with Metroid.
Let’s check out the summary.
The Federation had other heroes besides Samus Aran. Heroes who risked everything to save the lives of the innocent. Heroes who lost everything to complete their duty.
Yeah. I’m just gonna count that as a Stu point.
*Adds Trajik Hero to the Stu-Pot*
Title: From Another World
Media: Video Game
Topic: Mass Effect / Parallel Realities
URL: From Another World Chapter 6
Critiqued by Erttheking
Chapter 6: True Identity
Starting chapter six and ohhhhhh boy these chapters are starting to get long. Anyway, we start off on the Presidium.
Shepard, Ashley and Kadian looked at the Presidium. Admiring the view from ambassador Udina’s office. Shepard had been to the Citadel twice with his foster parent’s. The place was impressive.
Uh…thank you…for that…vital info.
His mind wondered as he thought of the walk over to the embassy. Eyes where on him and giggling from teenage girls. All he did was smile back at them.
This kind of thing would make Ashley jealous but this time it didn’t. Her mind was wondering what John was going to say. She thought she knew him but all of that has know changed. After he woke up he seemed distant not talking like usual. She needed to find the right time to talk to him and find the truth.
Ah Christ, you’re going down the adoring fan route? That is annoying and contributes nothing to the story, end of discussion.
I know what some of you are thinking: “what, it’s a post and it’s not anything to do with fanfiction? The blasphemy!” I know it might come off as odd that I’m updating the Library with stuff.
But at the end of the day, I think there’s something that needs to be said about certain things that have been going on this week. Given the city in the post title, I think you know what it’s referring to.
I’ll get more into it after the jump, but I’ll just tell you now: it’s not gonna be funny. Not consciously, anyway. Read the rest of this entry »