2454: Spooptoberfest Guest Submission: Everyone Is Mutated!

Title: Everyone Is Mutated!
Author: JacquIreBriggs
Media: Video Game
Topic: Super Smash Bros.
Genre: …Adventure/Horror? …let’s go with that, sure.
URL: Edgy Lifelight and Prologue/Chapter 2
Critiqued by Elysium16 and Rimura

(This is Halloween plays over the speakers. Elysium bursts into the room, dressed as Link and carrying a fake Master Sword.)

Elysium: *swinging the Master Sword* Ha! Hyah! HAAAAAAppy Halloween, patrons!

…I hope it’s still October. I have NO idea when this’ll go up.

Anyway! I WAS going to use this fic for when we reach the halfway point of Kirby: Welcome to Smash Bros., buuuuuuut it clearly WANTS to be a horror fic (despite the fact that it isn’t tagged as horror), and it has mutants, so it counts!

*looks at the doorway* ‘Mura, come on, we talked about this.

Rimura: *muffled* I’m not going in there.

Elysium: Why?

Rimura: I hate this thrice-damned costume!

Elysium: Oh, come on! This is the last time you’ll have to wear it, you can suck it up!


(Rimura enters the room, dressed like Princess Zelda.)

Rimura: This had better not get on any social media.

Elysium: I make no promises.

Anyway! Let’s just jump right into it: Everyone is Mutated! by JacquIreBriggs.

Roll tape!

Read the rest of this entry »

2453: Halloween Oneshots – Spooptoberfest Part Three

Title: All Souls’ Day
Author: pronker
Media: Movie (Book)
Topic: Star Wars
Genre: Spoopy Horror
URL: All Souls’ Day
Critiqued by TacoMagic and Darth Lord Crunchy (Retired)

Howdy, patrons!  Welcome back to the spooptoberfestivities!  We’ll be starting off today with the last of the pronker trio!  Crunchy, care to recap the first two for us?

“Nothing happened.”

Yup!  But this week will be different!  Well, no it won’t but at least we have an author’s note this time.

Author’s Note: This is finally getting Roan out of the pickle I put him in in 2007. Completion of the stories “Lord Vader Needs Feet” and “Jedi Zombie.”

“I suppose we can be thankful this note is at least pertinent to the story, if still entirely unnecessary.”

Onward to the-


“To the six-hundred-eighty-two?”

I’m sure that’s foreshadowing.

Read the rest of this entry »

2450: RWBY and Outlast – Chapters 1-4

You’re reading about another dimension, a dimension not only of prose and and narrative but of pure, concentrated suck. A journey into a twisted land whose boundaries are that of a poor writer’s feeble imagination. That’s the header up ahead—your next stop, the Badfic Zone!

Title: RWBY and Outlast
Author: Fanfic Bros
Media: Web Series / Video Game
Topic: RWBY / Outlast
Genre: Hurt/Comfort / Horror
URL: Chapters 1, 2, 3, and 4
Critiqued by BatJamags and Ruby-Doo!

Hello once again, patrons! I’m your host, BatJamags, and I’m back with something that really shouldn’t exist. You thought we were done with RWBY, but you were wrong! I decided that this year’s Badfic Zone would focus on horror games instead of movies for a change in pace. Of course, I happened to have a half-finished crossover riff on hand for just such an occasion!

Read the rest of this entry »

2449: SOMA: the story (my version)

Title: SOMA: the story (my version)
Author: evamartin26hotmail.fr
Topic: SOMA
Media: Video Game
Genre: Horror/Sci-fi
URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12843438
Critiqued by Crazy Minh and Major Wade

*The Bongo is a sparking mess. Replacement meatshields crew are disembarking from shuttlecraft within the sole functioning shuttlebay. Disco balls are being cranked back into the ceilings. Blown electrics are being repaired. Half the lights are blown, and the other half are flickering menacingly. The mess hall is unusable, and is filled with rotting souflees. Dead bodies line many of the hallways, either crushed by the force of immense gravity, or thrown about violently when the gravity was disabled. The bridge is half disassembled, with many consoles removed for repairs, leaving in their place tangles messes of wiring and the occasional Space Weevil. Only the captain’s console and the tactical station remain intact*

Goddamn superlasers…seriously, next time we dock at a riffbase, I’m installing circuit breakers…*Minh notices the viewscreen is on*

Hello patrons, and welcome to Spooktober! I’m Crazy Minh, and he’s Major Wade!

Sir, I have three hundred OHS forms here for you to sign off on. Also a bunch of status reports, some damage assessments, a handful of requisition forms, and a few thousand letters that need to be sent to the families of the deceased.

Not now, Wade! Today, we’re celebrating Spooktober with a story based on the psychological horror game, SOMA!

Read the rest of this entry »

2448: Project: Der Schlanker Mann – Oneshot

Title: Slender
Author: optimus27000
Media: Video Game
Topic: Slender: The Eight Pages
Genre: Horror/Supernatural
URL: Chapter 1
Critiqued by Ghostcat



Hello, dear Patrons, and welcome to yet more ‘interesting’ interpretations of Slendpai.

This fic has a very … brief summary.

This is the origin of the infamous Slender Man

Based on my extensive experience reading Slender Man fics, it’s probably going to be one of three things; alien/cryptid species, evil science experiment, or he’s going to be some sort of supernatural entity.

Project:Der Schlanker Mann

You know it’s going to be scary ’cause it’s in German.

I’m going to warn you that this fic is one dense Wall-o-Text that doesn’t even have spaces between the (run-on) sentences, so I’m going to do my best to chop it into more manageable bricks.

Read the rest of this entry »

2444: Kirby: Welcome to Smash Bros – Chapter Five

Title: Kirby: Welcome to Smash Bros
Author: Quartz2006
Media: Video Game
Topic: Super Smash Bros.
Genre: Romance
URL: Chapter 5
Critiqued by Elysium16 and Rimura

(The door swings open, and Elysium enters the room. Grumbling to herself, she flops onto the couch and checks her wrist. She then remembers she doesn’t have a watch. She also remembers she has a job to do.)

Elysium: Welcome back, patrons!

Last time, Kirby packed, was picked up by Mario and Yoshi, and broke time and space. This time, we actually get to the Mansion (yes, I know the place is called Smash Bros., but it’ll always be the Smash Mansion to me).

Oh! And I just found out—Quartz has a DeviantArt account, where she (yes, she) posted cover art for this story. Let’s give it a looksie!

…well, it could be worse. *coughs, which sounds suspiciously like “Voicebox”*

Let’s get into the chapter proper, shall we?

Read the rest of this entry »

2443: Slender – Oneshot

Title: Slender
Author: TheWanderingSaint
Media: Video Game
Topic: Slender: The Eight Pages
Genre: Horror/Supernatural
URL: Chapter 1
Critiqued by Ghostcat




Hello, dear Patrons, and welcome to my first Spooktober offering! Which, to absolutely no one’s surprise, is a Slender Man fic. It’s not a tentacle rape fic, though, even though I had an embarrassment of riches to pull from.

Let’s take a look at the summary to see why this one drew my attention.

Can anyone escape the beast known as Slender Man? Oneshot. I know this story is everywhere, but it’s supposed to be chaotic. Whether or not I succeeded is up to you.

Good to see you’re setting the bar low early, author.

Perhaps it’s just the old tabletop gamer in me, but any time I see someone claim they’re going to be going “chaotic” it usually makes me think they are going to try to get away with doing whatever the hell they want and then blame any inconsistencies in behaviour on their alignment.

I never should have let him out of his cage! I sprinted down the hallway. I could feel him behind me.

…I might have grabbed one of the Slendtai fics by mistake.

Read the rest of this entry »