1774: Brego’s Mistress – Chapter Five

Title: Brego’s Mistress
Author: hannah.jpg
Media: Books
Topic: Lord of the Rings
Genre: Drama and Romance
URL: Chapter Five
Critiqued by Angie

Howdy, patrons!

Brego’s Mistress, leggo!

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1773: Slender and Reader: Lost in the Woods : Chapter 1

 

Title: Slender and Reader: Lost in the Woods
Author: Pockypokemongirl
Media: Video Game/Creepypasta
Topic: Slender: The Eight Pages
Genre: Romance/Horror
URL: Chapter 1
Critiqued by Ghostcat

 

 

 

Hello, dear Patrons!

I’m here with a little fic from the Slender: The Eight Pages section of ff.net – and it’s a Reader fic! Because you know how “fun” those fics are. Lucky for you fabulous Patrons, I decided against riffing any of the Slender Man hardcore erotica (which is apparently called “Slendtai”) Reader fics.

Yes, that is really a thing. No, you should not Google it.

Anyway, lets take a look at the summary for this particular fic;

Reader x Slenderman Your mom and you were in Germany for a trip but things turn into a supernatural encounter because of an accident. Hey since due to the fans I wrote more for you guys enjoy! Tweaked the second chap for yah.

While I do enjoy travelling with my mother, I doubt we would take a trip to Germany by ourselves – primarily because neither one of us knows any German, which would probably hamper our enjoyment.

Hello. Spring break is here so I’ll be posting here and there, so my main thing now is I should have written a Slenderman thing long ago this might be a story hope you like.

Well, that was pointless – but at least it was short. Let’s hope the trend continues!

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1772: Love & Bullets – Chapter Eleven

Title: Love & Bullets
Author: MissScorp
Media: Comics
Topic: Batman
Genre: Drama/Romance
URL: Chapter 11
Critiqued by BatJamags (BadJamags and GoodJamags)

What do you need us for? count: 12

Bullet count: 0

Dick is a dick count: 9

Hello, once again, patrons! I’m your guest host, BadJamags…

GoodJamags: … And I’m your guest guest host, GoodJamags…

… And we’re back for more of Love & Bullets, the fic that’s finally almost fucking over. This chapter is called “Marry me,” so presumably something will actually happen. But of course there’s an epilogue after this. There just had to be a fucking epilogue, because otherwise the fic would end.

GoodJamags: Let’s just skip the canned author’s note and jump right in.

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1771: Heroes and Villains – Chapter Twenty-One, Part Two

Title: Heroes and Villains
Author: Horrible’s Igor
Media: Television / Movies
Topic: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer / Kitchen Sink
Genre: Supernatural/Drama
URL: Heroes and Villains (Now Defunct)
Critiqued by TacoMagic and Eliza

Heyo, patrons!  Are you all ready for another installment of Heroes and Villains!?

Too bad, we’re doing it anyway.  I’m super busy dealing with all the ransomware fallout this week, so we’re just going to jump right in without any more preamble.

“Did you know that apparently Malkavians can’t be killed with stakes?” Willow asked the others, showing them the page in the book she was reading.

“Yes.  It’s been mentioned several times now.”

I changed my mind, can we go back to doing a preamble?

“Too late, keep going!”

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1770: Popo, Star Spawn of Cthulhu- Chapter 1

Title: Popo, Star-Spawn of Cthulhu
Author: William Ungerstein Fmerigo
Media: Books
Topic: H. P. Lovecraft’s Cthulhu Mythos
Genre: Horror/Supernatural
URL:  Chapter 1
Critiqued by
AdmiralSakai and Guard-Novitiate Psk’nyor “Nina” C’hon

Hello hello, all you patrons, and welcome to my first riff as an official member of the Library of the Damned!

Good for… you, I guess. But if this doesn’t mean you’re finally going to write my cameo into Y’ha-nth’lei Minute like you promised, I really can’t be bothered to give a flying glub.”

You know, there are other characters in the UNITYverse aside from yourself…

Pffffff.”

Well, a few days ago I confirmed that there is indeed a ‘Cthulhu Mythos’ section to fanfiction.net, and it’s… well, really about what you’d expect. The status of H.P. Lovecraft’s mythos as one of the earliest formal ‘shared’ canons that any writer could contribute to, coupled with a writing style that was… well, both very distinctive and kind of formulaic has guaranteed the existence of droves of solidly OK superficial imitators.

And then there’s this story, by William Ung… *squints at username and tries to find the vowels* umm… William. I give you “Popo, Star-Spawn of Cthulhu”.

Hmm.

Actually, that makes a fair amount of sense.

Wrong Popo, buddy.”

Oh.

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1769: Betrayal – Chapter One

Title: Betrayal
Author: Darksakudragon
Media: Anime
Topic: Naruto
Genre: Fantasy/Adventure
URL: Chapter One
Critiqued by Lyle

I’m sorry.  I’m so, so very sorry.  I can’t apologize enough for what I’m about to subject you to, my poor lovelies.  Welcome to “Betrayal.”

“Betrayal” hails from the Naruto section of ff.net.  Koori has been conspicuously absent since I mentioned I was going to look into riffing this fic, but I’m sure she’ll show up periodically to rage at the story for it’s numerous inaccuracies.  I won’t bother infodumping before we get started since I’ve done Naruto fics in here before.

Let’s dive in.

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1768: The Girl – Chapter Nine

Title: The Girl
Author: MRobitussin
Media: Books
Topic: The Outsiders
Genre: Romance
URL: Chapter Nine
Critiqued by Angie and Hiraani

*shakes Magic 8 Ball* Will there be Socs and Greasers in this chapter?

“Ask Later.”

*Angie walks angrily into the broom closet, sopping wet. Hiraani is waiting for her. She sits down*

Hiraani: What happened?

Nothing.

Hiraani: Why are you all wet?

No reason.

Hiraani: …you fell into the shark tank again, didn’t you.

…maybe.

Why are you here?

Hiraani: You said I could riff with you.

Oh. *rubs eyes* That’s right. Alright, let’s read The Girl.

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