2045: Legend of Zelda: The True Force – Chapter Four, Part Two

Title: Legend of Zelda: The True Force
Author:  Hikari no Vikki
Media: Video Game / Movie
Topic: Legend of Zelda / Star Wars
Genre: Adventure / Fantasy
URL: Legend of Zelda: The True Force
Critiqued by TacoMagic

Hey, patrons!  Are you ready to finish off chapter four!?

Tough, we’re doing it anyway.

I’d sum up all the important new events from last time, but you know how that goes.  So far as unimportant points, well, Link snuck into the castle in a box of milk.  There you go.

And, happy days, since we’re starting mid chapter we don’t have an inane header to skip over!

Sadly we do have a lot of plot regurgitation this week, so you may want your galoshes.

For those following along, here’s where we are in the plot:

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2044: Unity — Oneshot

Title: Unity
Author:  Demonic Dragon
Media: Cartoon
Topic: My Little Pony
Genre: Romance / “Sad” / “Slice of Life”
URL: The Whole Shebang
Critiqued by: AdmiralSakai and Serketry

-WARNING-

The ‘fic under review today contains potential flamebait in the form of tactless, teen-angsty handling of suicide and probably depression and/or domestic abuse and/or hate crimes or something. It’s all pretty damn vague, but flamebait nonetheless. There is also discussion of a number of issues raised by the source material that, while abstract, are in fact very political in nature.

Hello hello all you patrons, and welcome to something that is not, in fact, Friendship Is Magic: The Covenant War.

Yeah, I could use a break. There was just so little actual MLP in it, it was starting to feel dense and… kinda stale.

So, instead, I went ahead and found us a little ‘fic that has a whole lot of MLP in it, except it also happens to be the part of MLP that is about as far from Friendship is Metal as The Covenant War is from tense and well-paced military science fiction.

Ladies and gentlebeings of the Library, prepare yourselves for an introduction… to Thorax.

Son of a fucking bitch.

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2043: The Realm of the New God – Chapter Three

Title: The Realm of the New God
Author: ThatoneSelfInsertGuy
Media: Video Games
Topic: Fire Emblem
Genre: Self Insert
URL:  Chapter Three
Critiqued by Zues Killer Productions

Warning: This particular riff has several sections that describe severe car accidents, as well as the messy results of said accidents. Putting in a trigger warning for anyone who isn’t comfortable with the subject.

Realm of the New God riff part 2-The tension of attrition

Welcome back to the riff of Realm of the New God. I apologize for the lateness in which this was delivered, as life was getting very busy.

Meanwhile

Life: American History from 1900

Life: Shitty weather systems

Life: Call of Duty Classic and United Offensive.

Life: Legends of the Titan

I should also mention something else: I’m covering game arcs, because me reviewing every chapter in this style is about as worthwhile as using a single Lifesaver to stave off starvation for 3 days. So, without further ado, let’s finish the intro to the game.

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2042: Salvation – Chapters 2 and 3 (Finale)

Title: Salvation
Author: FreddysNightmare1984
Media: Film
Topic: Deliverance
Genre: Adventure/Suspense
URL: Chapter 2
Critiqued by BatJamags

Caution: Fic contains extreme plot regurgitation. Please take appropriate sanitary measures.

Hello once again, patrons! I’m your host, BatJamags, and I’m back with another thrilling chapter of Deliverance: Comments from the Peanut Gallery Edition. Let’s start the next chapter before I talk myself out of doing this, shall we?

WHOOT,

On second thought, maybe I should just scrap the whole thing. Door, would you mind letting me out?

*No*

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Art-tastic Saturday! – Etrian Odyssey Stuff (or, “SC is a Lazy Bitch”)

Howdy, folks!

So, as the title very clearly indicates, I procrastinated like a fool, and my riff wound up not getting finished on time.

…So here, have some pictures as a half-hearted apology for it!

Firstly, from Etrian Odyssey Untold: The Millennium Girl, DeviantART user Ritzueli gives us a look at the Story Mode party:

Counter-clockwise: Arthur the Alchemist, Raquna the Protector, The Highlander the… uh… Highlander, Simon the Medic, and Frederica, the titular Millennium Girl.

Etrian Odyssey 2: Heroes of Lagaard gives us a very bored Gunner gal having herself a tea, seemingly unaware that she’s about to be slaughtered by butterflies and a mole (no, really, that’s what that pink-and-purple thing in the corner is):

BEHIND YOU, ASSHOLE! YOU DON’T HAVE TIME FOR TEA!

DeviantART user thejabawack introduces us to their guild, “Scoobs,” from Etrian Odyssey 3: The Drowned City:

In order from left to right: Zodiac, Princess, Monk, Gladiator and Hoplite.

Over in Etrian Odyssey 4: Legends of the Titan, it would appear that one of the Landsknechts got into a bit of a shouting match with Chrom from Fire Emblem: Awakening, and things have gotten a bit out of hand:

Oh my.

And finally, in Etrian Odyssey 5: Beyond the Myth, DeviantART user Kuerag shows us a guild of adventurers taking a quick lunch break:

In order from left to right: Dragoon, Warlock, Rover, Herbalist, and Masurao.

Have a good weekend, everybody!


2041: She’s Got a Little Bit of Raptor in Those Angel Eyes – Chapters 12 & 13

 

Title: She’s Got a Bit of Raptor in Those Angel Eyes
Author: AmazingGraceless
Media: Movie/Book
Topic: Jurassic Park/Jurassic World/Twilight
Genre: Adventure/Family
URL: Chapter 12
URL: Chapter 13
Critiqued by Ghostcat

 

 

 

 

Hello, dear Patrons, and welcome back to the continuing adventures of everyone’s favorite Photoshopped camel human/raptor hybrid! In the last chapters, Lex managed to jump-start a Jeep with her homebrewed batterator and then we got the bit where the pterodactyls attack.

Edward could hear the thoughts of Carlisle, and turned to have his beloved run into his arms.

Huh. I did not think Carlisle and Edward had that kind of relationship – at least, not in this fanfic. Kind of makes those previous times when Carlisle was referred to as Edward’s father figure a bit more squicky, though.

He held Bella dearly, letting their thoughts mingle together, ignoring the symphony of horror around them.

Both Carlisle and Edward use male pronouns, so either one could be holding her. Presumably it’s Edward, because of the mind-reading thing, but he can’t read Bella’s mind. Bella is a natural shield, the only way Edward can read her is if she forces that shield to include him, which is shown in the source materials to be an incredible difficult thing for her to do. I don’t really understand why, since she can easily extend that shield to protect others over a great distance, but that’s how it is.

“Where’s Alexis?” Edward asked when they broke away.

“She-she’s gone, Edward, we couldn’t find her,” Bella said. “O-Our daughter is gone.”

…And? Lex has been missing since the first couple of chapters, so this isn’t exactly news.

“She can’t be!” Edward cried. “I saw her in the plaza,” Edward said. “With two boys. I think they were with that woman that looks like Victoria.”

Presumably that’s a reference to the fact that Blythe Dallas Howard played both Victoria and Claire, but I really hope that’s not the only reason the author wrote this crossover. (It’s not entirely implausible; I have a Kung Fu Panda/Megamind crossover in my pile that the author freely admits to writing just because Crane and Minion have the same voice actor.)

Bella shuddered imperceptibly at the thought. “The manager? I thought she was rather awful. We need to-“

Get back to something resembling a plot? I agree.

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2040: Legend of Zelda: The True Force – Chapter Four, Part One

Title: Legend of Zelda: The True Force
Author:  Hikari no Vikki
Media: Video Game / Movie
Topic: Legend of Zelda / Star Wars
Genre: Adventure / Fantasy
URL: Legend of Zelda: The True Force
Critiqued by TacoMagic

It’s Wednesday!  And do you know what that means?  It means the doors are locked from the outside until we finish another chapter of True Force.  Well, half a chapter.  As this fic goes on the chapters get progressively longer and, mercifully, include more not-stolen content to riff on.  So, I’m going to have to start breaking them up to keep them things at manageable length.

This week I almost have enough to make a recap!  By almost, I mean the whole recap of the unique content would look like this:

Child Link meets child Anakin in Hyrule Castle Town and they play a board game.

So we may as well just jump into the fic.  And boy do I have a treat for you in today’s author’s note!

Oh, also, starting today I’m going to be skipping everything in Vikki’s header except the disclaimer since it is unique every chapter.  And we really don’t want to skip this week’s.

Well as of now, George Lucas still owns Star Wars and Shigeru Miyamoto still owns the Legend of Zelda. And, last I checked, both of them are guys. I’m a girl. You do the math.

Do the math?  Okay, so two guys plus one girl equal-

*A cacophonous blast of porno music launches Taco out of his chair*

I own nothing, except my plot.

I’m sorry, your plot?  Your plot!?

Author’s Notes-

Yes, there is an actual plot.

Technically true, but it’s still not YOUR plot.

And yes, we’re getting to it, but I need you all to sit tight while I work on some character development, okay?

As a reference, if you think you have to say something like this to your audience, you’re failing pretty hard as an author.  Which, to be fair, Vikki certainly is failing pretty hard as an author.

Thanks.

Now go read my stuff. :)

I’d be happy to!  Can you point me to something that’s actually yours?

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