1763: Heroes and Villains – Chapter Twenty-One, Part One

Title: Heroes and Villains
Author: Horrible’s Igor
Media: Television / Movies
Topic: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer / Kitchen Sink
Genre: Supernatural/Drama
URL: Heroes and Villains (Now Defunct)
Critiqued by TacoMagic and Eliza

Welp, we’re finally there, the home stretch.  Now that Igor is completely out of fucks to give, we enter the freefall stage.  The shark jumps, the editing dwindles, and what passes for the plot becomes even more fragmented and incoherent.

“You make it sound so good!”

Don’t I, though?

“Recap?”

Sure.  Spike does a sparring session with team Buffy, and then quickly drops that in favor of most of the group running off to go look for the very items that Willow was just told about in the previous scene.  Because that’s how good writing works.  On their way there Jim is invited to exposit his backstory, which he does.  It’s a contrived backstory, and since it’s about a character that nobody honestly gives a shit about, there’s no real need to revisit it.   After a quick chat with the embodiment of the plot, they’re directed to the same place Willow’s going.  It’s also dropped that Igor has decided to change his mistake into a plot point involving Sunnydale being completely restored.  Presumably with a “because magic” in there somewhere.  And if you’re wondering why it took the members of Team Buffy this long to think something was strange with Sunnydale being back, then you’d be forgetting that nobody in this fic actually has a brain.

“It turns out that you don’t need one to star in a fanfic!”

The chapter trails off with a scene of DEEP FORESHADOWING™ where a bunch of vampires with extremely fake accents talk about stuff that I can’t be bothered to remember, and then an ASMR vampire shows up because why the fuck not?  Igor literally had no fucks left to give when he wrote that scene, which is why I skimmed the crap out of it.

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1751: Heroes and Villains – Chapter Twenty, Part Two

Title: Heroes and Villains
Author: Horrible’s Igor
Media: Television / Movies
Topic: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer / Kitchen Sink
Genre: Supernatural/Drama
URL: Heroes and Villains (Now Defunct)
Critiqued by TacoMagic and Eliza

Hey guys!  Welcome back to Heroes and Villains, the fic with more nothing in it than any other fic!

“Not to mention more pointless references!”

Yes, there is that.  Last time?

“Four words, Taco: Compulsory Physical Fitness Program!”

Wasn’t there also something about Vampire the Masquerade?

“Crazy vampires have the best bling, and Mr. Red wants it.”

Right, how could I forgot.  Onward to part two!  And, as promised, it’s all about team Buffy.

“Talking to each other.”

But of course.

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1744: Heroes and Villains – Chapter Twenty, Part One

Title: Heroes and Villains
Author: Horrible’s Igor
Media: Television / Movies
Topic: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer / Kitchen Sink
Genre: Supernatural/Drama
URL: Heroes and Villains (Now Defunct)
Critiqued by TacoMagic and Eliza

“Hi, people!  We’re back with more!”

More talking.

“Still counts as more!”

I’m not really sure it does.  Want to handle the recap?

“Willow asked Elsa to go threaten Spike so he wouldn’t become involved.  After that, Elsa went and threatened Spike so he wouldn’t get involved.”

Ah.  Onwards!

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1738: Heroes and Villains – Chapter Nineteen, Part Two

Title: Heroes and Villains
Author: Horrible’s Igor
Media: Television / Movies
Topic: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer / Kitchen Sink
Genre: Supernatural/Drama
URL: Heroes and Villains (Now Defunct)
Critiqued by TacoMagic and Eliza

Hey, patrons!  Welcome back to the second half of what I’m calling ‘the nose-dive chapter.’

“It really is obvious that Igor has completely run out of ideas.”

Not only that, he’s totally run out of fucks to give.  That means we’re in store for the total burn out.  There will be a large burst of activity in terms of a few chapters that get posted in a short amount of time as Igor tries to rally some interest in the project, and then the dwindle to nothingness.

“Recap?”

Naw, nothing new was served up in the first half.  All we got was a bunch of irrelevant dialogue that I assume was supposed to be character building, and a discussion from the Buffy crew that we’ve basically seen a few times before.

“But Spike!”

Right, almost forgot, Spike is being called in as a maid.  I guess that’s the summary for the last chapter.  Spike in a maid outfit.

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1732: Heroes and Villains – Chapter Nineteen, Part One

Title: Heroes and Villains
Author: Horrible’s Igor
Media: Television / Movies
Topic: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer / Kitchen Sink
Genre: Supernatural/Drama
URL: Heroes and Villains (Now Defunct)
Critiqued by TacoMagic and Eliza

“Hi everyone!”

Urrrrnnnnnnng.

“Taco stayed up too late playing Breath of the Wild last night.  Again.”

Look, I can’t help it.  I say ‘five more minutes and I’ll stop’ and then the temporal anomaly in my living room acts up and it’s two hours later.

“And you’re certain that temporal flux is the most reasonable explanation as to why you keep getting to bed late?”

I can think of no other plausible explanation.

“‘Kay!  Recap!  Last week Salix Tech announced their new robot line in a plot arc that is in no way a complete ripoff of I, Robot!  And then we got to read Team Buffy react to this announcement by stating the obvious for about ten minutes.  That was pretty much it.”

Somehow it felt like there was even less.

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1726: Heroes and Villains – Chapter Eighteen, Part Two

Title: Heroes and Villains
Author: Horrible’s Igor
Media: Television / Movies
Topic: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer / Kitchen Sink
Genre: Supernatural/Drama
URL: Heroes and Villains (Now Defunct)
Critiqued by TacoMagic and Eliza

Hey, patrons, welcome back!  Gonna whip through it this week since my schedule is a bit tight, so let’s jump into this!

“What about the recap!?”

Sure, go for it.

“They talked about what they would do after they conquered the world.”

You done?

“Yup!”

Okay, let’s do this thing!

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1721: Heroes and Villains – Chapter Eighteen, Part One

Title: Heroes and Villains
Author: Horrible’s Igor
Media: Television / Movies
Topic: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer / Kitchen Sink
Genre: Supernatural/Drama
URL: Heroes and Villains (Now Defunct)
Critiqued by TacoMagic and Eliza

Hey folks!  Since last week’s chapter didn’t matter in the slightest, even by the author’s own admission, we’re not going to bother recapping it other than just saying it was Igor getting all grimdork and edgelardy because attention seeking.

“Whereas we seek attention by tearing into the low-hanging fruit!”

Damn straight!  Let’s get this attention train on the rails!

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