2616: The Shadow Warriors – Chapter 37

Title: The Shadow Warriors
Author: Shadow knight1121
Media: Comic book
Topic: “Justice League” (Batman)
Genre: Crime / Mystery
URL: Chapter 37
Critiqued by BatJamags (GoodJamags)

Hello once again, patrons! I’m your guest host, GoodJamags, and I’m back with more of your occasional dose of edge! And the first riff in weeks I’ve actually had time to edit!

Chapter 37: Love Is The Greatest Mystery

Oh, so it’s another filler chapter.

Authors Note: Okay, since I got this chapter out I only have three words.

Actually, I’d estimate you’ve got about 157,000 words, given that we’re about a chapter and a half shy of this monstrosity’s halfway point. Not counting sequels and previous installments.

I know, Patrons, the truth hurts. I’m sorry.

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2611: The Edgiest Christmas of All (The Shadow Warriors – Chapter 36)

Title: The Shadow Warriors
Author: Shadow knight1121
Media: Comic book
Topic: “Justice League” (Batman)
Genre: Crime / Mystery
URL: Chapter 36
Critiqued by BatJamags (GoodJamags and BadJamags)

Hello once again, patrons! I’m your guest host, GoodJamags…

BadJamags: And I’m your usual host…

… And we’re back with more edge. Last time, that guy no one remembers from the Mr. Freeze episode of Batman: The Animated Series launched a dumb revenge plan that was foiled by the Dork Patrol.

BadJamags: Thus ensuring that all involved parties managed to not quite accomplish anything of importance.

We resume the action with some holiday festivities!

BadJamags: You know what I want for Christmas?

What’s that?

BadJamags: This fic to end.

No.

BadJamags: You’re the worst Santa ever.

And with that, let’s cut over to your chapterly news briefing.

Opener

As usual, credit to Anne for this.

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2607: Predators and Prey – Chapters 7 and 8

Title: Predators and Prey
Author: CablesAndCrack (Apparently with some collaboration with someone named CMR Rosa)
Media: Comic Book
Topic: Birds of Prey
Genre: Drama / “Romance”
URL: Chapters 7 and 8
Critiqued by BatJamags

WARNING: The fic has rape scenes. It’s bad. While the over-the-top gross-out factor is lower due to excessive summarization, the plot itself is not entirely dissimilar to Celebrian.

Hello once again, patrons! I’m your host, BatJamags, and I’m back with the thrilling conclusion of our adventure through the mind of a very disturbed author.

Last time… Hell, it doesn’t matter. Nothing matters anymore. Basically, sex happened, none of it consensual.

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2603: Battlestar Prometheus – Chapter 2

Title: Battlestar Prometheus
Author: Ruin Queen Of Oblivion
Topic: Battlestar Galactica/X-Men
Media: TV show/multimedia comics franchise
Genre: Sci-Fi/Adventure
URL: Battlestar Prometheus
Critiqued by Crazy Minh & Major Wade

Hello Patrons, and I hope you’ve had a happy 2020 so far! I’m your Guest Riffer, Crazy Minh, and with me is Major Wade! 

Heya.

Today, we cover the second and final chapter of Battlestar Prometheus, a BSG fic with the entire cast replaced with the X-Men for reasons that are currently unknown…much like the Cylon’s nebulous plan. Which was revealed to be less of a plan, and more desperate improvisation to the escape of the Galactica and the civilian fleet. But still, it was sorta like a plan, I guess?

Sir, please focus.

Right. Anyway, last time on Battlestar Prometheus…we basically got the plot of the miniseries regurgitated incorrectly to us; with the events of the canon three-hour backdoor pilot being twisted out of order, mixed with random plot points from the 2004 TV show, and every major character being given the Ctrl-C+V treatment with characters from X-Men. Oh, and we also got introduced to Renegade, a OC who is apparently Rogue’s daughter. 

Let us commence today’s festivities! We start with yet another author’s note…

Well, here comes chapter 2 of Battlestar Prometheus, there are still many a mystery left to be revealed, not the least of which is the identity of the 12 Cylons like in the show, but one greater mystery remains.

This statement makes me really doubt whether the author has seen BSG or not. So, yes: there is a mystery about who the twelve Cylons are, and how many infiltrators are in the fleet. However, by the fifth or sixth episode of season two, we already know that there’s only eight infiltrators in the fleet, and we’ve seen six of the twelve models. The seventh is revealed in Season 3, and those models are the “leaders” of the humanoid Cylons, the Cavils. The remaining five models are the Final Five, but that arsine subplot isn’t relevant to the Miniseries, or even worth mentioning; fourth season being what it fucking is. 

Who is the Hybrid that the blonde Cylon was referring to? That is one thing that will remain a mystery until the time that I decide to reveal their identity.

Um…OK, so I think I need to explain what a Hybrid is here. 

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2602: Predators and Prey: Chapters 4, 5, and 6

Title: Predators and Prey
Author: CablesAndCrack (Apparently with some collaboration with someone named CMR Rosa)
Media: Comic Book
Topic: Birds of Prey
Genre: Drama / “Romance”
URL: Chapters 4, 5, and 6
Critiqued by BatJamags

WARNING: The fic has rape scenes. It’s bad. While the over-the-top gross-out factor is lower due to excessive summarization, the plot itself is not entirely dissimilar to Celebrian.

Hello once again, patrons! I’m your host, BatJamags, and I’m back with another chapter of hell. Last time, the author daybooked his way through the horrible tortures Killer Shark was inflicting on his “villainous” victims, and then the brainwashed sex dolls who used to be strong, badass characters captured Gypsy, so she could be subjected to further indignities and join their ranks.

I want to kill something.

Normally, I like to get a little ways into the riff and reach some witty comment or joke before I add the “Read More” cutoff tag, but we get right into the gross stuff, and I’m not giving anything in this fic the dignity of appearing on our front page.

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2597: Predators and Prey – Chapters 2 and 3

Title: Predators and Prey
Author: CablesAndCrack (Apparently with some collaboration with someone named CMR Rosa)
Media: Comic Book
Topic: Birds of Prey
Genre: Drama / “Romance”
URL: Chapters 2 and 3
Critiqued by BatJamags

WARNING: The fic has rape scenes. It’s bad. While the over-the-top gross-out factor is lower due to excessive summarization, the plot itself is not entirely dissimilar to Celebrian.

Hello once again, patrons! I’m your host, BatJamags, and oh dear god it’s this thing. Send help.

Uh, I mean, welcome back to our thrilling riff of Predators and Prey! Last time, terrible things happened, and also the author didn’t understand continuity. Huntress, Lady Blackhawk, and five random villains are under Killer Shark’s brainwashing serum, which would be a reasonable plot if it weren’t being used to write shitty porn. Anyway, Oracle went out on a field mission for some reason, teamed up with the “extended roster,” which consisted primarily of people who have never been on the team at any point. They got beaten up by the brainwashed squad even though they totally should’ve won that fight and then they went and hid in a cave.

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2592: Predators and Prey – Chapter 1

Title: Predators and Prey
Author: CablesAndCrack (Apparently with some collaboration with someone named CMR Rosa)
Media: Comic Book
Topic: Birds of Prey (The comic, which has essentially nothing to do with the movie)
Genre: Drama / Romance
URL: Chapter 1
Critiqued by BatJamags

WARNING: This fic is disgusting, disturbing, discomforting, and a bunch of other words that begin with “dis.” But if you want to see me turn into a gushing fanboy about the source material, you should at least get some value out of the infodump.

Birds of Prey is quite possibly the best goddamn series DC has ever published and everyone should read every last issue of it.

Got your attention?

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