730: A Witch needs her Cat – Chapter One, Part Two

Title: A Witch needs her Cat
Author: FlamingAxel
Media: Anime/Manga
Topic: Black Cat
Genre: Adventure/Romance
URL: Chapter One
Critiqued by SC

Hello, and welcome back to A Witch needs her Cat, by FlamingAxel! I’m your host and guest-riffer, SC, and in the last part, FlamingAxel talked a lot about shit they didn’t know, and I was thoroughly disappointed by the emergence of the most heartbreaking Sue ever – heartbreaking, because she started out so well as a character.

With me, again, are Contacts and Glasses; and Shades, who I totally didn’t drag in by her hair while she whined profusely about not wanting to do this.

Shades: *sniffle*

So, I know I said this would be left until after DMC4, but because of chapter eleven,  this is being resumed sooner than predicted. We get to go from things that are best left to be forgotten to idiotic combat, foreign exchange fail, and bounty hunters who simply should not be! Joy!

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729: Behind the Mask – Chapters 1, 2, & 3

Title: Behind the Mask
Author: AntimatterManticore
Media: Cartoon
Topic: Justice League
Genre: None listed
URL: Chapter 1
URL: Chapter 2
URL: Chapter 3
Critiqued by Ghostcat 

 

Greetings, dear Patrons!

This time I’m bringing you a short little fic, it is so short I’m tempted to call it a one-shot even though it is seven chapters long. Each chapter is really short – the entire fic clocks in at just over five thousand words – and the seventh chapter is just an Author’s Note, so I’m dividing it into two riffs of three chapters each. It’s from the Justice League section, so get ready for some DC Animated Universe geekage!

:frantic rattling noises:

Did I mention I locked the doors? ‘Cause I did.

:loud pounding:

And bolt-taped them.

:more frantic rattling:

And then I had the ninjas bolt-tape the windows shut. I actually forgot that we didn’t have windows in the bunker, so the clan installed some and then bolt-taped them. They are quite the dutiful little minions.

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728: Quarter Quell Sequels – The Cavern’s Secret, Chapters 1 and 2

Title: Quarter Quell
Author: L.Q. Brooks
Media:  Books/Movies
Topic: Ice Age/Hunger Games
Genre: Family/Suspense
URL: The Cavern’s Secret: Chapter 1
URL: The Cavern’s Secret: Chapter 2
Critiqued by Herr Wozzeck

Hey everybody.

*shudders*

Well, we’re back to snarking this series. Oh dear God, this series. My god, if the first one was as bad as it was…

*puts on helmet*

Well, we’ve gone this far, so let’s just go with it! Read the rest of this entry »


727: Raptor and I – Chapter Thirty-Two

Title: Raptor and I
Author:
 Akashi.Cloud / ZincRae
Media: Movie
Topic:  Jurassic Park
Genre: Adventure/Romance
URL: Raptor and I: Chapter 32

Well here we are folks, the last installment of ZincRae’s first try at a bestiality lemon fic.  And… our Critiqued By field is missing again.

“Strange, I figured we were saving resolution of that little sub-plot for this last episode.”

You’re right.  So what’s this about?

*Eliza rushes in with a team of darthwraiths and they quickly string up a banner*

cooltext1580943340

Aww, that’s so sweet.  She made a glittery, neon word-art banner.  It’s even in a font that mimics some of the old 8-bit fonts.

“Um, but she also mis-”

Shh, don’t ruin the moment for me!

“Maybe we should just start the fic, then?”

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726: My Little Fallout, Vegas Isn’t Magic – Chapter 9 & 10

Title: My Little Fallout, Vegas Isn’t Magic
Author: SomeGuyCamping
Media: Video Game/Cartoon
Topic: Fallout/My Little Pony
Genre: None Given
URL: Chapter 9 & Chapter 10
Critiqued by Erttheking

WARNING! THIS SNARKING MAY CONTAIN RAPE TRIGGERS! SUCH AS WITH THE FIRST TIME IT IS VERY POORLY WRITTEN BUT THE ACT DOES INDEED OCCUR! PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION!

N: Ert, remind me what she’s doing here again?

E: Well, she seems to be a lot more passive than Stupard, so I thought that we could…I don’t know, try to ease things over a bit and have her take part in the review.

B:…

N: Don’t think she’s gonna be contributing a whole lot. Goeth, Cornelia and Woods are all keeping an eye on Stupard right?

E: Cornelia and Woods are, Goeth is doing what he can to track Manus’ movements. He’s nowhere near us yet, but he’s being a little too quiet for comfort.

N: I think this is a bad idea.

E: Just give it a shot.

N: All right, but don’t say I didn’t warn you. Well, does she know how this works?

B: Yes.

N: Comforting. Well, might as well get right to it. Read the rest of this entry »


725: My Immortal – Chapter Thirty and Thirty-One

Title: My Immortal
Author: Tara (reposted by the lovely internet trolls)
Media: Book / Movie
Topic:  Harry Potter
Genre: Romance / angst
URL:  My Immortal – Chapter 30 and 31
Critiqued by Lyle

Holy shitballs, everyone!  We’ve made it to chapter 30 0f this suckfic!  Only 14 more to go after this!

*waits for the collective groan to subside*

So, last time on My Immortal, Ebony, Draco, and Harry went into a random room to discuss the back-in-time plan.  Then, because reasons, they decided to make Star Trek porn by sticking Spock into her [somewhere] while Harry video taped it.  They were interrupted (thank Grod) by McGonagall and Snape.  The worst teachers in the world took all three into another random room full of torture implements and McGonagall left the kids alone with Snape.  We’re left at a squicky cliff hanger where the kids are tied up and Snape is about to either make fetish porn or whip them.  I don’t know which and I’m afraid to find out.  If someone would like to hold my hand as we continue, I’d appreciate it.

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724: Legendary Adventures, Futuristic Saviors – Prologue and Chapter One

Title: Legendary Adventures, futuristic Saviors
Author:Stone-Man85
Media:Movie/Anime
Topic: Princess Mononoke
Genre:Adventure/Romance
URL:Legendary Adventures, Futuristic Saviors – Prologue
URL: And Chapter One
Critiqued by SC

Hello readers (and Librarians), and welcome back to the Library! (Except you, Librarians; I know they lock down the airlocks at night so you can’t escape. I don’t know who “they” are, but I know they do.)

I’m your host and guest-riffer, SC, and-

“But, SC! Another riff? Are you shitting me right now?!”

Nope, I’m not. I know I have three whole riffs going on already, and yeah, it probably seems like I’m going a bit overboard, but right now, I don’t count DMC4 in my lineup due to having put it on indefinite hiatus after that chapter. It wasn’t too-too long ago, so I shouldn’t need to tell people what I mean when I say THAT CHAPTER.

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