1858: Maya and Raider – Chapter Three

Title: Maya and Raider
Author: EclipsePheniox
Media: Video Game
Topic: Borderlands
Genre: Adventure/Romance
URL: Chapter 3
Critiqued by Delta XIII

Sorry these keep taking so long; my laptop was having a few problems. Plus, it takes me a while to regain the motivation to continue with this.

I’m starting to think I should have stuck with squirrelking fics a bit longer.

By the way, from now on, I’m going to keep my 500 sins of pettiness separate from the main counter and add them in at the end. This is mostly to make it easier for me to type, so that I don’t have to keep remembering to add the extra 500.

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1857: Coffin Rock: Retold – Chapter Six

Title: Coffin Rock: Retold
Author: PureNexus
Media: Movies
Topic: The Blair Witch Project/Alpha and Omega
Genre: Mystery and Horror
URL: Chapter Six
Critiqued by Angie

What’s up everybody? Welcome back to Coffin Rock: Retold, and today…I assume we’re getting more shit taken straight from The Blair Witch Project. I’m certainly excited.

I don’t think there’s a need for a ‘last time on’ since this fic is pretty unforgettable. So without further ado, let’s read on.

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1853: Succubus – Chapter Four

Title: Succubus
Author: GypsySiren
Media: Video Games
Topic: Skyrim
Genre: Look at my Sue, my Sue is Amazing, It Came From the Formless Void
URL: Chapter Four
Critiqued by Leider Hosen and Sabre-Captain Kallybre Drygg

No trigger warnings to start the Riff today, fair patrons. Woo hoo! Though I find myself triggered by a distinct lack of clothing thanks to a certain horny female type…

Kallybre: You shush, I let you off easy.

No you. Whatever, this is the last chapter of the fic. It’s time to put another one to bed and move on to the next big shit. Unfortunately, this chapter has a whole lotta’ nothing, and it’s very large compared to the other chapters.

Kallybre: So about as long as the author’s manhood?

That’s low, Kallybre; but yes, laziness is mercifully conductive to extremely short chapters, even if the pacing makes it feel way longer than needed. Let’s begin the drag burns with the final obligatory author’s note:

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1852: Unknown Origins – Chapter One, Part One

Title: Unknown Origins
Author: Cyberweasel89
Media: Video Games
Topic: Fallout: New Vegas
Genre: Adventure and Romance
URL: Chapter One
Critiqued by Angie and Hiraani
Rating: M

Helloooo, friends! My name is Hiraani, and Angie…. *awkwardly looks over to Angie, slamming her head against the wall*

Angie: It’s stupid! It’s so fucking stupid! This fic is terrible!

Angie needs a little break, so I’m going to be filling in for this chapter. Which…judging by the Prologue, will take me eleven years. That’s okay! Let’s dive into Unkno—

Queenie: *slams open the door with her foot* I AM HERE TO HELP.

That’s okay.

Queenie: I HAVE BEEN SENT BY THE ROYAL GUARD.

…Gumdrop?

Queenie: No, the royal guard.

Okay. So Gumdrop.

Queenie: Anyway, they informed me that inferior human left you alone to review this fic.

Angie? She’s not that bad. And it’s only for this chapter—

Queenie: The chapter that will take several thousand weeks to review in its entirety? Right. Let’s take a look at Unknown Origins.

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1850: The Shadow Warriors – Chapter Five, Part Two

Title: The Shadow Warriors
Author: Shadow knight1121
Media: Comics
Topic: Justice League
Genre: Crime/Mystery
URL: Chapter 5
Critiqued by BatJamags (GoodJamags and Kane)

Shadow Kill count: 5

Hello once again, patrons! I’m your guest host, GoodJamags, and we’re back for more of The Shadow Warriors!

Kane: For some reason beyond even my comprehension, this one has asked me to return as well.

Last time, not much happened. Like, at all. This time, I don’t expect much better.

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1847: Succubus – Chapter Three

Title: Succubus
Author: GypsySiren
Media: Video Games
Topic: Skyrim
Genre: Stupid Fucking Idiots Doing Stupid Shit
URL: Chapter Three
Critiqued by Leider Hosen and Sabre-Captain Kallybre Drygg

!!Warning!! Atop previous warnings of abduction trivialization, suddenly and from behind we have mild rape trivialization. Great.

Welcome patrons, to the fanfics! Last time on “Succubus”: Kitty Sue went to her “home”, which is really a trust between two sly business owners, and made poorly written love to Sammy G. In the haze of afterglow, Sammy G warped her into Skyrim and played mad scientist with her DNA. And that’s about it.

-Kallybre chugs from a sizable cask of whisky- Huff, I believe I’m in the proper state of mind to be reading this now. Let’s get it over with.

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1846: Coffin Rock: Retold – Chapter Five

Title: Coffin Rock: Retold
Author: PureNexus
Media: Movies
Topic: The Blair Witch Project/Alpha and Omega
Genre: Mystery and Horror
URL: Chapter Five
Critiqued by Angie

Howdy, all! My name is Angie, and we are returning with yet another edition of Coffin Rock: Retold. Last time, Nexus completely ripped off an entire scene from The Blair Witch Project even though this takes place seventeen years after the events of the movie. So, without further ado, let’s read.

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