No Space Nazis For You This Week

So, Cleveland is on pretty much complete lockdown right now; I haven’t left my apartment in about a week and am thoroughly enjoying the shorter commute and inability of anyone to come to my desk to pester me.

This has resulted in one of my own ‘fics kicking into pretty high gear development-wise, to the point where basically all of my writing efforts have been focused on that and I just haven’t been interested in riffing as much. I’m not in any kind of trouble or on the outs with the rest of the site or anything, I just am currently seeing weekly riffs as more of a distraction from a story that’s burning a hole in my hard drive waiting for me to finally finish and post it.

So, no new updates for probably another week or so.


2570: To Last A Thousand Years — Chapter 1 Part 2

-WARNING-
The author begins to put his political views on fairly public display in this chapter, and they are… pretty much exactly what you’d expect from a guy who writes alternate-history HFY fanfiction featuring weirdly defanged Nazis.

Also, weirdly defanged Nazis are still Nazis, and are still in this ‘fic.

Title: To Last A Thousand Years
Author: TallYapflip
Media: Video Game
Topic: Mass Effect
Genre: Sci-Fi/Adventure
URL: Chapter 1
Critiqued by AdmiralSakai

Hello hello all you patrons, and welcome back to To Last A Thousand Years.

Last time, we had a boringly mostly adequate section where some U-Boat captain found a wrecked Council ship in Antarctica, then for some reason this influx of new technology and weapons made Hitler want to reopen peace talks with the British because that‘s totally how Nazis would think.

Actually, “because that’s totally how Nazis would think” is shaping up to be a countable offense in this ‘fic, because these seem to be Nazis with every hint of racism or other undesirable qualities neatly and authorially excised.

This all brings us to the second half of Chapter 1, where the ‘fic becomes less of an implausible alternate-historical ‘fic and more of a regular old HFY ‘fic with, what else, a massive timeline featuring implausible events we mostly couldn’t care less about!

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2567: To Last A Thousand Years — Chapter 1 Part 1

–WARNING–
The ‘fic under review today contains political flamebait in the form of Nazis.
Like, actual literal Nazis this time, not just people who talk and act like Nazis but claim not to be Nazis, or people calling each other Nazis, or self-described neo-Nazis, but the genuine article Version One-Point-Oh. I really hope I don’t need to tell anybody why that’s bad, mmmkay?

Title: To Last A Thousand Years
Author: TallYapflip
Media: Video Game
Topic: Mass Effect
Genre: Sci-Fi/Adventure
URL: Chapter 1
Critiqued by AdmiralSakai

Hello hello all you patrons! I’m continuing my travels through Things In My Riffs Folder That Aren’t The First War by today taking a look at another Mass Effect alternate-humanity ‘fic that looks at The First War, giggles dementedly in its face, and asks, “why the hell are you all settling for merely crypto-fascist?”.

I actually made a joke about a ‘fic like this existing way back during the latter parts of Velocius et Fortius, but that was based on the assumption that nobody would actually be shameless enough to attempt to write it.

I assumed wrong. This is a thing that ACTUALLY EXISTS.

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2562: Sweet Disaster — One-Shot, Part 3

Title: Mass Effect: The First War
Author: HeiKitsune
Media: Video Game
Topic: Halo
Genre: Romance/”Humor”
URL: The Entire ‘Fic
Critiqued by AdmiralSakai

Hello hello all you patrons, and welcome back to the second half of Sweet Disaster, which is proving to be not at all sweet but indeed pretty damn disastrous.

Last time, Lady ‘Kalmon Filter’s dad wandered into the unclearly-explained facility where Nakastura lives, and raged around a bunch because he couldn’t find his daughter, but then she showed up and was all “BECUZ I LUV HIM!!!!” and that calmed her old man down somehow. Also Nakastura and his sister routinely beat up the Marines under their command for really no reason. And that was about it.

This story is sliding into nothing-fic territory incredibly quickly, and if I’d known that going in instead of assuming it’d all be as ridiculous as the first scene I don’t think I’d’ve riffed it. After all, if I wanted to read more edgy imbeciles screaming about nothing much while the plot grinds to a halt to accommodate them, I’d’ve just kept on with First War.

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2557: Sweet Disaster — One-Shot, Part 2

Title: Sweet Disaster
Author: HeiKitsune
Media: Video Game
Topic: Halo
Genre: Romance/”Humor”
URL: The Entire ‘Fic
Critiqued by AdmiralSakai

Hello hello all you patrons, and welcome back to the second half of Sweet Disaster, which is proving to be not at all sweet but indeed pretty damn disastrous.

Last time, we were treated to an extended interlude involving the hangover of one “Kane Nakamura”, an edgy UNSC employee of unclear rank or section who has a variety of accents, ‘nanomachines’ in his blood, and a cybernetic arm that even Freddy Kruger is looking at and being like “Dude, chill with the random knives on everything”. He woke up in bed with a horny Elite named “Lady ‘Kalmon”, who apparently lives next the base they are apparently on, and had apparently completely trashed Nakastura’s room the night before. Not a lot actually happened after that other than Nakastura’s disturbingly-sexualized half sister (who is some kind of a captain) showing up in his room and cursing him out for the whole “slept with Lady Kalman Filter” thing, and apparently Daddy Kalman Filter is wandering around outside breaking stuff.

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2553: Sweet Disaster — One-Shot, Part 1

Title: Sweet Disaster
Author: HeiKitsune
Media: Video Game
Topic: Halo
Genre: Romance/”Humor”
URL: The Entire ‘Fic
Critiqued by AdmiralSakai

Hello hello all you patrons! Today we continue my vacation from The First War with yet another ‘fic from my Massive Pile of Hideous Fem!Elite Halo ‘Fics, in this case the… appropriately-titled “Sweet Disaster” by some random dude(?) with a RWBY OC as his avatar and a whopping one-hundred-and-seven ‘fics on his profile. Most of them are dubious anime-focused shipfics, which apparently he got paid for since the majority of his profile page is an advertisement to take commissions at 0.01 cents per word (or possibly 0.03 cents per word, depending on where on the page you are looking).

This one, though, appears to be a self-motivated effort.

Unfortunately.

I would have paid him 0.05 cents per word to delete every trace of it so that I never have to deal with it again.

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How to Not End Up in the Library: Dis Displacement-Dissing Dissertation/Discussion Disservice — Self-Insertion and Displacement ‘Fics

So, I was going to post something from my Massive Pile Of Fem!Elite Fics (why oh why do I still have a Massive Pile Of Fem!Elite Fics?) to start off my vacation from The First War, but this kind of hit me in a flash of inspiration and so we’re doing that instead.

What exactly is “that”, though? A discussion of two very common -and very commonly reviled– tropes-slash-genres in fanfiction, the self-insertion and the displacement.

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