1313: A Look Into His Past – Oneshot

Title: A Look Into His Past
Author: tinkrbell225
Media: Cartoon
Topic: The Real Ghostbusters
Genre: Romance
URL: A Look Into His Past
Critiqued by TacoMagic

Heyo, patrons!  Welcome to another Wednesday where I’ll be serving up some hot one-shot action!  This week we have a little fic that’s actually two fics, that is also one fic, while being two fics.

Let me unpack that for you.

Originally this fic was posted as two separate one-shots, with the second being a “part two” of the first.  A one-shot sequel as it were.  Later, for whatever reason, the author decided to just tack on the second part as a chapter to the original fic, without also going back and deleting the stand-alone version of it.  What is even weirder is that the first part dates back to 2003, the second part was written in May 2014, but they weren’t combined until May 2015.  And, given that there is no evidence of any editing having occurred to either part, I have no idea why that timeline is a thing.

The thing I’m really surprised at, though, is despite the 11 year difference, there is no apparent improvement in the writing.  In fact, if anything the second chapter is significantly worse.

Now, before we dive in and tear this thing apart, let me be clear on something.  The author, according to herself, was 18 when she wrote the first chapter and 29 when she wrote the second. Keep that in mind.

So, for those wondering, the canon on the table today is The Real Ghostbusters which was a long-running cartoon series based on the movie.  It was very much a monster-of-the-week show in the 80’s style where there’s little in the way of plot continuity between episodes for the first few seasons, but toward the end got more plot based as the intended audience aged.  It’s one of those shows I grew up with that I have very fond memories of, but honestly hasn’t suffered the passage of time as well as it could have.  Compared to more timeless cartoons such as Duck Tales, Animaniacs, and Batman the Animated Series, The Real Ghostbusters utilizes much younger humor, occasionally crutches on outdated pop-culture references, has more than a little corny dialogue, features a cast of cliché characters, and overall presents a package that, at times, talks down to the audience.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s still a good show with a lot going for it despite it’s flaws, and it’s definitely better than things like Spongebob, Captain Planet, or Sonic Underground. But, after 30 years, it shows its age more than some of the other classics of the same era.

I’m hoping I don’t have to hit on what the premise of the show is given that it’s in the title, not to mention based on a movie that most of you have probably seen.  I’m going to touch on it anyway, but I’m hoping it’s not necessary. The show is pretty simple: four dudes, Ray, Egon, Venkmen, and Winston, run a business hunting down and trapping ghosts to get them out of people’s hair.  Sometimes literally.  They have a little ghost pal named Slimer (based extremely loosely on the same ghost from the movie) that serves as the non-verbal comic relief character.  There’s also Janine, their snarky secretary.  SHe, frankly, is probably the best character in the show and really needed to get more screen time in the earlier episodes before her character got radically redesigned in season three that made her far less interesting.  Okay, yeah, I’m a bit of a Janine fanboy.

Now the canon here is pretty unimportant for the fic we’re about to read except one thing: Janine has a big thing for Egon.  It’s one of the recurring themes in the show which eventually culminates in them getting into a relationship in the later seasons.  It’s also a theme that carries over into the Extreme Ghostbusters (the more modern remake) where Janine and Egon get back together just as Egon is reforming the Ghostbusters with a younger crew.  Keep in mind, this romantic tension is pretty constant throughout the entire series.

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