1606: Heroes and Villains – Chapter Ten, Part Two

Title: Heroes and Villains
Author: Horrible’s Igor
Media: Television / Movies
Topic: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer / Kitchen Sink
Genre: Supernatural/Drama
URL: Heroes and Villains (Now Defunct)
Critiqued by TacoMagic and Eliza

Hey folks!  Welcome back to Igor Makes References, otherwise known as Heroes and Villains.

“Recap!  Last time Jimmy and Buffy were bored in their cell and wanted a book, Elsa and Willow went drinking together, Willow gave Buffy a book, and the prisoners used the book to escape.”

But, because following all that might have managed to be too interesting, we start out this week over with Dr. Horrible as he does things.  Important things.

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1605: My Inner Life: Chapter 23 Part 1

Title: My Inner Life
Author: Link’s Queen
Media: Video Game
Topic: Legend of Zelda
Genre: None
URL: Whole Story
Critiqued by Erttheking

Ert: Dear. GOD! Look at the fucking size of this chapter! Nearly 15k words.

Goeth: I’ll put the coffee on.

Nora: Double for me.

A New Friend
A few months later,

Ert: Stop. Just fucking stop with the time skips. You can’t do it, you just can’t fucking do it.

Nora: Feels like Frank Miller wrote this drek.

Link and I were at Lake Hylia with our son and fairies on a family picnic, when the most amazing thing happened.

Nora: The narrator suffered a fatal heart attack!

Nora: Forcing the story to end!

I have always remembered stories being told me by my parents about a noble race of creatures called Griffins. It was told to me that these wise and noble creatures live in the (12)Black Mountains just north of (13)Dragonmount, which was a day’s ride from Hyrule. I had never thought I would have ever met one of these noble creatures until now……..

Ert: The Black Mountains? The Black Mountains!? SO THIS STORY TAKES PLACE IN FUCKING NORTH CAROLINA!?

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1604: Love of a Spartan – Chapter Thirteen, Part One

Title: Love of a Spartan
Author:  AshleyBudrick
Media: Video Game
Topic: HALO
Genre:  Sci-Fi/Romance
URL:  Saved to this Archive
Critiqued by Admiral Sakai, Gul, and the Arbiter

Hello hello, everyone, and welcome back yet again to Love of a Spartan.

Last time Troy Fisher was able to deliver to Renee her well-deserved comeuppance for sleeping through most of the defense of Lacerta Colony, only to be interrupted and directly countermanded by his old foe the Master Chief. Having secured his bunkmate effective immunity from anything resembling proper discipline, the once-proper Spartan split the Marines up into pretty much randomly-determined teams, and then they finally loaded up the Pelicans to deploy to the colony.”

Terrible Troy Counter: 68

Mommy’s Little Marines (And Spartans) Counter: 51

Halight Counter: 20

Chapter 13 / “Twelve” is entitled ‘Arrival’, and Forerunners willing promises more of the same genuine combat as the first several.”

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1603 – Arkham Asylum – Chapter Eight

Title: Arkham Asylum
Author: hathanhate
Media: Comics
Topic: Batman
Genre: Adventure/Hurt/Comfort
URL: Chapter Eight
Critiqued by BatJamags and Duke Alexander of Landfall

Running the Asylum count: 16

Out of Character count: 22

Hello once again, patrons! I’m your guest host (thinking too hard about that is a federal offense, even for people in other countries) BatJamags, and today, we’re finishing this!

In celebration of finishing this pile of trash, I’ve brought in one last co-riffer. Ladies, gentlemen, and interns, meet Duke Alexander of Landfall.

Duke Alexander: A pleasure to make your acquaintance.

Oh, sure it is, before you get to know them. The Duke here comes from the same setting as Kane (and kind-of Supercilious – I haven’t had a chance to use that character yet). He’s a high-level human noble. He’s what you might call a renaissance man. He’s a skilled swordsman, a fairly powerful wizard, a respected scholar, and impeccably well-mannered.

Oh, and he’s also evil.

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1602: Dragon Tales Lost Episode – One Shot

Title: Dragon Tales Lost Episode
Author:
Anonymous
Media:
Creepypasta/Cartoon
Topic:
Dragon Tales
Genre:
Horror
URL:
Dragon Tales Lost Episode
Critiqued by Angie

WARNING:

A shit ton of faux spoopy stuff. Although, there are also references to physical and sexual abuse, drugs, and sexual references exchanged between siblings. So, if any of that hits too close to home, kindly look away. I’ll put another warning right before and after each scene.

Alright alright alright, I’m back again. Happy late Thanksgiving, patrons! Look, yeah I’m a little late on that ‘Happy Thanksgiving’, but I decided I would bring down the mood for a second and…JEFFREY.

Jeffrey: WHAT?!

TURN DOWN THE LIGHTS.

*lights flicker off*

I…I didn’t say to turn them off. Isn’t there a knob?

Jeffrey: Well I can’t see now.

That’s your own problem.

Anyway, I thought I would go ahead and say who I’m thankful for. I’m thankful for my fellow librarians, to name a few, Herr, Lyle, Ghostie, Taco, Ert and SC. But to name a few others who I lead here, Austyn, Keira, and others. I also wanted to include Andy/Max here.

But enough of that nonsense. Let’s get to what you came here for. The review.

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1601: I’ll protect you – Chapter 7

Title: I’ll protect you
Author: Sessh-Amy

Media: Video Games
Topic: Slender: The Eight Pages
Genre: Romance/Hurt/Comfort
URL: Chapter 7

Critiqued by Ghostcat

 

 

Happy Black Friday, beloved Patrons! I hope you’re enjoying and/or enduring America’s annual Festival of Consumerism.

The last chapter featured quite a lot of awkward face-grabbing and snuggling that I’m desperately trying to forget, so let’s move directly into this chapter!

Slender Man P.O.V.

Huh. Looks like we’re sliding right into Slendpai again. I think the lack of prefacing Author’s Notes may be a sign that the author is starting to lose enthusiasm for her fic.

A howl, no, a loud roar came from the forest.

So which was it? Those are two very different sounds.

A low growl erupted from my throat. The pesky creatures have returned to the town.

Oh, no! They might try to do stuff WITH THINGS!

I slowly propped myself up on my elbows, careful not to wake Thaddeus, and listened closely to the passing wind outside the house.

Stop listening to the house farting and concentrate on the howl-roar, dude.

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1600: Heroes and Villains – Chapter Ten, Part One

Title: Heroes and Villains
Author: Horrible’s Igor
Media: Television / Movies
Topic: Buffy: The Vampire Slayer / Kitchen Sink
Genre: Supernatural/Drama
URL: Heroes and Villains (Now Defunct)
Critiqued by TacoMagic and Eliza

“Hi, Everyone!  Look who’s back!”

*Taco grumbles*

“You’re just grumpy because the Darkwraiths forgot to take the soup out of the cans before loading the soup cannon.”

At this point, I don’t expect anything else from them.  No, I’m grumpy because this week the fic is really stupid, and is almost entirely dialogue.  Plus the author does something really inane to start out our chapter, which you’ll see when we get there.

“Isn’t it normally mostly dialogue?”

Yes, and this week Igor has done away with most of that small portion of narrative the rest of the fic has.  And then, toward the end of the chapter, Dr. Horrible has a long, rambling monologue that makes me want to remove my brain and step on it.

“You make it sound so good!”

So, recap?

“More talking.  Elsa and the prisoners shared some awkwardness before Willow bust in and sent Elsa off to renegotiate the terms of the agreement with Bad Horse.  Elsa promptly forgets what she’s supposed to be doing, and instead goes and talks to Dr. Horrible.  They share a ‘moment’ and then Elsa takes off without anything getting resolved.”

Sounds like I missed a lot.

“Nope!”

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