1591: Love of a Spartan – Chapter Twelve, Part One

Title: Love of a Spartan
Author:  AshleyBudrick
Media: Video Game
Topic: HALO
Genre:  Sci-Fi/Romance
URL:  Saved to this Archive
Critiqued by Admiral Sakai, Gul, and the Arbiter

[Future AdmiralSakai’s note: In the time between when I wrote this riff and when it actually appeared, AshleyBudrick decided to go ahead and begin uploading a much improved rewrite of the story to her old FF.net account. I’ve been passing her a little constructive criticism now and then, but it’s mostly been about relatively minor things- I still don’t really know what direction the story is going to take, but it’s good enough from chapter to chapter that it’s more than worth reading on its own. I, of course, still intend to continue my riff of this version to the bitter end- partly because that’s what I said I’d do, but I also think these riffs will prove to be worthwhile in helping other people to start on the process of learning to be as good a writer as AshleyBudrick now is.

The new ‘fic can be found here, and I highly encourage interested patrons to check it out and maybe leave a review or two of their own.]

Hello hello everyone, and welcome back to Love of a Spartan, the ‘fic that makes The Eight Spirit look action-packed and thrilling.

“Previously… well, even by LoaS standards extremely little actually happened. The crew received orders to try to defend a colony called Lacerta from the Covenant, but other than that Kilburn and Smythe were still unprofessional, Lieutenant Fisher was still justifiably exasperated, and John-117 was still an unstable, borderline-abusive psychopath.”

Terrible Troy Counter: 52

Mommy’s Little Marines (And Spartans) Counter: 42

Halight Counter: 18

Thus without further ado we can begin. Chapter Twelve/”Eleven” is called “Rise and Shine”, which considering that Renee ended the last chapter inside of the Master Chief’s latest quarters already has some rather filthy implications.

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