1957: A Special Task — Chapters 15, 16, and 17

Title: A Special Task
Author: Generatedname
Media: Video Game
Topic: Mass Effect
Genre: Sci-Fi/Adventure
URL: Chapter 15,  Chapter 16, and Chapter 17

Hello hello all you patrons! Last time on A Special Task we were treated to the beginning, middle, and end of the Bataliban Batarian Rebellion all tied up in a nice Gary Stumanity bow. First, the humans encountered a Bataliban ‘separatist’ frigate- how did ‘separatists’ get a frigate to begin with??- and granted it asylum without bothering to figure out what it wanted or what was even going on (and also blew the everloving tar out of the massive Hegemony pursuit fleet that had somehow managed to not destroy it for an unspecified amount of combat beforehand. After that the humans immediately started smuggling (drastically underpowered compared to their own shit) weaponry to Kar’shan, which struck me as a bit weird given that the ‘separatists’ were revealed to possess entire space stations completely under their control.

Despite apparently having an enormous manpower and materiel advantage over the Hegemony their coordinated assault was well on its way to failing due to their troops inability to do anything other than charge directly into danger and get themselves shot, but fortunately the humans then showed up to bail them out. This process was repeated to ‘pacify’ all of the batarian colonies, out to the last Hegemony holdouts on Arathot (where two thirds of the population was killed!) at which point the humans found Object Rho and the Batarian Republic (whose actual policies are still uncertain but who was apparently thinking of continuing to hold all of the Council citizens the Hegemony had abducted as slaves until Tevos talked them out of it) decided to join the Grand Interstellar Alliance Of Fuck-The-Salarians-And-Their-Little-Dog-Too.

Just Write A Star Trek Crossover Already Counter: 6

Chapter 9.5- Stirrings in the Void

Chapter Nine-point-five?? CHAPTER NINE-POINT-FIVE??

“I’m not much of a cook, but I don’t think stirring the void would do much of anything.”

I dunno, it might break up some of those chunks of the apartment from I Will Survive I keep running into.

Unknown Location, Dark Space

An ancient consciousness stirred within a shell of black metal. It slowly regained its self awareness for the first time in 50,000 years, sending out the activation call to all its brethren. First hundreds, then thousands, then millions of minds joined with Harbinger, answering his call. The cycle was soon to begin anew, new races ready to begin their ascension to perfection. Harbinger spread his mind throughout the galaxy, feeling it, sensing it, through thousands of mass relays.

“Well this is all… oddly sexual.”

HarbingerXGalaxyOTP?

“Well, that’s flattering (and also disgusting), but I’m happily bonded.”

Never mind.

However, a few of the relays failed to respond.

Did Harbinger try hitting Control-Alt-Delete?

It was as if they had been destroyed, or removed somehow. Harbinger continued to search for the missing relays, before one of them started to suddenly respond. Harbinger extended his consciousness to the relay, seeing through its sensors. He felt, saw, a ship, a primitive ship, use the relay, jumping into parts Harbinger couldn’t care less about. Then, several minutes after the relay reappeared, Harbinger felt it suddenly start to vanish. He felt the relay being swallowed up by a portal, generated by strange, foreign devices affixed to it, alien consciousnesses managing them.

Ok, do even the Reapers themselves not know about the humans’ stupid DUMMENSHINAL warp drive? Are they really that fucking special that this has not been seen not just in the galaxy but in every previous Cycle?

Harbinger’s sight suddenly cut off as the relay disappeared through the portal, taking a few scraps of his mind with it. For the first time in billions of years, he felt pain, as his mind was torn in two, one half disappearing to parts unknown.

“’A few scraps’ is ‘half’ of Harbinger?”

If Harbinger had been a human, he would have started screaming chains of expletives at what he had just witnessed. He would have shouted in fury and outrage at a plan he had spent billions of years perfecting suddenly being made invalid.

“It takes the destruction of a single relay to render the Reapers’ plan invalid? Because, in the early days of the Citadel when they were figuring out how they worked, the Council species destroyed a few Relays. That’s how we know how dangerous it is to do that.”

But Harbinger was not human, so he settled for the next best thing. “Very Intriguing.”

Here you go guys, a little mini-chapter for you while I mentally plan out the Prothean Ruins arc! Harby & Co. make their first appearance, and Harby sees just what the humans have done to his precious relay!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA HARBINGER! ALL YOUR RELAYS ARE BELONG TO US NOW!

Well that ENTIRE CHAPTER added a whole lot.

Chapter 10- Rebirth

October 1st, 2160

I love how we’ve watched First Contact, normalization of relations with the Citadel Powers, the construction of the largest space station in galactic history, and a major political upheaval in the Terminus Systems all in the space of three years.

“BREAKING NEWS: A massive series of prothean ruins has just been discovered on the newly settled human colony of Eden Prime.

“Well that was quick.”

Yeah, one of the things I actually liked about Javik’s entrance in ME3 (yeah, this is Javik, because I guess the Bataliban Rebellion pretty much drained the story’s reserves of original content already) was that he wasn’t found immediately after the Beacon- archaeological digs typically take years to decades to actually complete IRL.

A joint human/council science team is being sent to begin excavations. The Human team is being led by the famous Dr. Henry Lyman, an archaeologist famous for his work on the Mars ruins.

[BLARING ALARM BLARES]

*Famous Department of Redundancy Department Agents who are famous charge famously into RIFFCON and slam into an impenetrable barrier of blue energy.*

“Little busy right now, please come back… never.”

Meanwhile, the Council team is being led by the young Dr. Liara T’soni, daughter of the prominent matriarch Benezia.

You know, she has a last name.

Guess what it is?

Here’s a hint- it’s T’Soni.

While her pureblood heritage calls her credibility into question among the Asari people,

This makes it sound like there’s a populist movement demanding that she be removed from public office.

her papers were well received by many human scientists, many of which have requested her presence on this expedition. She will be accompanied by several scientists from all council races, including hanar scientist Dolen.

And… a bunch of other people who don’t matter enough to name, I guess.

“Although it is reassuring to see the humans abandoning at least some of their pointless secrecy.”

They will be departing to Eden Prime aboard the human frigate, UES Independence early tomorrow morning.

The ruins on Eden prime were not much to look at.

Which is why they will never be described.

Human excavators had already dug out an entrance into the ruin complex. Several items of interest had been recovered for scientist investigation.

I really hope these diggers took note of the proper soil and structure context of their finds and kept the rest of the material somewhere for when the scientists needed to look at important elements like metallic-powder residues that a layman wouldn’t consider ‘interesting’.

“…”

… They just tore everything up with a backhoe, grabbed whatever they could see that was shiny, and dumped the rest in a landfill, didn’t they?

“…”

Yeah, the galaxy’s doomed.

One of them seemed to be some kind of rifle, found next to a strange pod, which had also been recovered. The human frigate slowly descended, its kilometer long form dwarfing the structures on the ground, landing struts extending from its underside.

There’s no scene divider in between these sentences, by the way. The story just goes from focusing on the Archaeologist Delivery Service, to a rundown of the contents of the ruins, to back to the Archaeologist Delivery Service. This seems to be a recurring problem in the story where information is given to the viewer but not organized in a logical fashion where similar topics are located next to each other or connected with any sort of transition.

It touched down near the dig site, a ramp extending from its underside, a shuttle flying out, carrying the science team. It touched down at the dig site proper, the science team emerging from within.

“That seems… unnecessarily complicated.”

Why not just take the shuttle from orbit?

They were met by the head of the excavation team.

“Hello. Welcome to the Eden Prime dig site. We have removed several objects of interest and put them over there.” The man pointed towards a prefab structure to the left of him.

“Good. We’ll start there. After this, we’ll go down into the ruins. Lets get to it.” Dr. Lyman said. The scientists walked into the tent, finding an object that interested them, taking it and examining it.

I feel like the IQ of the entire story dropped like 50 points just in this paragraph.

T’soni and Lyman found themselves examining the strange pod. A scan revealed nothing, the pod having a layer of heavy metals to block radiation.

“That means the scanners did not, actually, detect ‘nothing’; they detected a layer of heavy-metal radiation shielding.”

It seemed to be powered, as some sort of battery was attached to the back side of the pod. “Sarah, can you interface with this?” Lyman asked the AI mech next to him. “I can.” The AI replied, before doing just that. Several seconds passed, before the AI turned to the scientist and said, excitedly, “This is a prothean cryo pod, one that has a single lifesign inside! This could only mean that there is a living prothean inside it!”

“Can you get it out?” Lyman replied.

“Yes. It would just take a moment… there.” The AI said,

“It seems Lyman’s entire academic career is predicated on making his AI secretary do all the work for him.”

*sigh*… It looks like computer technology has finally eliminated the primary function of graduate students.

as the pod gave a hiss, steam blowing out of vents hidden in its sides, the pod’s front slowly sliding off. Inside, there was a strange, four eyed creature wearing crimson combat armor. Its wide, angular head was still for a few seconds, then its eyes snapped open.

“Remember, for us it has been fifteen years, but for him it has only been a few minutes!” Liara shouted,

“Liara T’soni thinks the prothean civilization collapsed fifteen years ago?

No wonder nobody took her research seriously.”

as the prothean did the same, in an unintelligible language.

“Any ideas Sarah?” Dr. Lyman asked the AI.

“Attempt to appear peaceful.” The mech replied.

“Really helpful there,” Lyman answered, as the prothean composed itself, before stepping forward, extending a finger, touching the human doctor.

Dr. Lyman fell still, his eyes focusing on things that were not there. The marines in the tent stepped forward, rifles aimed at the freshly defrosted prothean, before Dr. Lyman slipped back to reality. The prothean then spoke, in english. “Asari… Hanar… Salarian? Human? I am surrounded by primitives!”

“You know about our races?” Lyman asked.

“Know? Our kind practically created the Asari. You humans were only supposed to be a control group for them. I assume that the Asari are the ruling race of this cycle?”

“Ruling race? What do you mean?” Liara asked.

“You are not the leaders of this cycle then? Then of which race is your emperor?” The prothean replied.

“We do not have one. The asari, turians, and salarians form a council that, until the humans arrived, was the prime government in the galaxy.

“The… prime government?”

What does that even mean?

The humans have some form of parliament, where their population, as well as the population of their allies, is represented.” Liara replied.

“How primitive. If someone resists your rule, you crush them into submission. Why have your kind not taken action against the humans? You should have crushed them as soon as they refused to cooperate!”

Dr. Lyman laughed at that. “If the asari, of all people, manage to break through our defenses, then we deserve to be enslaved! They’re still using primitive mass accelerator weaponry and kinetic barriers for god’s sake! Our ships could cut them apart without taking a scratch, and that is if they even manage to get into our space!”

“Then why have you humans not subjugated the council?”

Well, they’ve only had three years…

“We are not a violent race. If we were, then Liara would be in chains somewhere on one of our colonies, and we would likely have shot you as soon as you exited your pod.”

“You’re not a filthy salarian, though, so we’ll let you live for now.”

“Foolish primitives. In my cycle, there was only one empire. Any that resisted were crushed and subjugated. All new races had the choice to join us or die. We ruled this galaxy, nobody dared resist us.”

“What? But all evidence points to your government being a democracy! We structured our council based on this!” Liara said.

“You then, are a particularly foolish primitive in a galaxy full of them.” The prothean replied.

“You actually believed that the protheans were a democracy? When we have literally found intact computer records saying the protheans were an empire?” Dr. Lyman said, incredulously.

Wait, when was this? Did the story add this information into the prothean site on Mars???

“Well… yes, as that was the most popular theory.” Liara answered.

“You, human, are a slightly less foolish primitive than the rest here. You, asari, meanwhile, are likely the most idiotic sentient in this structure!” The prothean said.

“Does that assumption include synthetics?” Sarah asked.

The prothean turned around, catching sight of Sarah. His eyes widened, and he reached for a sidearm that was not there. Cursing in his native tongue, he spotted the rifle on the table halfway across the room.

Blah blah obligatory AI paranoia scene ROUND TWO, this time with the added bonus of human mechs apparently being able to shrug off prothean particle beams with no ill effects.

“After that, the hanar falls in to remind everyone that his species worships the protheans and does nothing else, and then Javik briefs the attended on the Reaper threat.”

“You do not know? No matter. I will tell you. Every fifty thousand years, a race of sentient machines, known as the reapers, appear out of dark space, the void in between galaxies. They were the ones who forged the mass relays, as well as the citadel. They created all this as a trap, one that ensures that all races develop along the desired technological path.” Several humans in the room exchanged glances.

“I thought the purpose of the Mass Relays was to allow civilizations to expand and guide them towards the Citadel.”

Nuh-uh, the purpose of the Mass Relays is to show how goddamn Smurt^TM the humans are for not using them even though when you get right down to it the only reason why the humans found their super-special DUMMENSHINAL travel technology was pure dumb luck.

“Every fifty thousand years, the keepers of the citadel activate its true function. The station is a huge mass relay, linking to dark space, a conduit for the reapers to enter the galaxy. Once they arrive, they wipe out the government at the citadel, before using the station to deactivate all mass relays. They will then harvest the advanced races of the cycle, system by system, world by world. We never knew their motives, only that we could not stop them.” Javik finished his tale.

“What happens if a race develops outside the reapers’ plans?” Dr. Lyman asked.

Gary Stumanity. I thought we went over this.

“I do not know. The trap has never failed. All races fall into it. The relays are the perfect trap.”

“What if a race has developed an effective alternative to the relays? What if they do not require them?” The doctor asked.

Didn’t we just go over this? Gary Stumanity.

“I said that I do not know. What are you playing at human?”

“We humans do not rely on the relays. We use our own form of FTL, which uses an alternate dimension as an effective alternative to the relays.”

“Then your kind may have a chance. The reapers may invade any day now, so you must shore up your defenses if you wish to have any hope of survival.”

“By the goddess… I was right!” Liara said.

“We must get you off world. You need to testify before the alliance parliament.” Dr. Lyman said.

“NO! The prothean must come with us! The council is in danger!” Dr. T’soni shouted back.

“I will go with the humans.

“Asshole.”

They have avoided the reapers’ trap, so my warning will not be wasted on them. I will then visit your council, and deliver my warning to them as well. For now, though, I go with the humans.

Wouldn’t that mean the Council would need the warning more, though?

They seem less primitive than your kind asari. I am disappointed, we gave the asari everything they needed to dominate this cycle, and you were beaten by your control group.” Javik said.

“I have a theory as to why that happened.” Lyman said. “You gave the asari everything. You made them dependent on your technology, making them unable to make anything on their own.

…

Didn’t know Dr. Lyman was a follower of Ayn Rand.

“A follower of Ayn Rand who conveniently forgot that the asari developed basically all of the technology galactic civilization now uses.”

When they found the relays, they thought they were your creations, and thus jumped headfirst into the reapers’ trap. They spread their ideology to the other races of this cycle, making them dependent on your technology as well, as they believed that your tech was the epitome of technological development. We had no such luxury. We had to fight for everything we had.

EVERYTHING YOU HAD WAS HANDED TO YOU ON A SILVER PLATTER BY THE SALARIANS.

While the asari were given biotics, we had to invent tools to compensate. While you gave the asari your technology, we had to invent our own. While you engineered the asari to be perfect, we had to overcome our imperfections. Now, look who has the antimatter cannons and dimensional drives, and look at who’s still using mass relays and considers 20kg mass drivers to be heavy weapons.”

The people who are still using mass relays are the people who gave you FTL spaceflight when you’d never even set foot on another planet. Hell, if we remember the Roswell incident (which I think the author doesn’t), you got your first infusion of alien tech before you’d even left Earth’s atmosphere!

“I see your point. Now let us leave this world.” Javik said.

“I will alert the Independence, the rest of the science team will stay behind, but you are coming with me. Sarah, you’re in charge.” With that, Dr. Lyman and Javik left the dig site.

“Does he not get a choice?”

As the shuttle approached the Frigate, Javik leaned out the window. “How did your race manage to land a dreadnought on this world? Even we considered this impossible!”

“That? Oh that’s just a frigate. Our dreadnoughts can go in atmosphere, but we usually can’t find 9×2 kilometer squares to land them in.” Dr. Lyman remarked.

“You call that a frigate? Its almost as big as one of our dreadnoughts!” Javik said, disbelief evident in his voice.

“We have 12 dreadnoughts in orbit, as well as one of our super dreadnoughts. After discovering this ruin, we tripled this system’s defense force, fearing that some idiot merc pack would be foolish enough to attempt an attack on a human colony for prothean tech.”

“Your navy needs twelve dreadnoughts to fight off a mercenary raid?”

The shuttle landed in the frigate’s hangar, the ramp closing behind them. As soon as the shuttle touched down, the frigate took off, a brief shudder coming from the inertial dampeners kicking in, before the ship soared off into orbit. Javik and Dr. Lyman walked to the forward observation lounge, arriving just in time to watch the Independence rendezvous with the rest of the human fleet. Javik’s jaw dropped as the human super-dreadnought came into view.

“How can your race afford to waste so much element zero on these ships?” He asked Dr. Lyman.

Hmm.

“How can your race afford to waste so much purple prose on these dicks?” He asked Dr. Lyman.

Much better.

“Rather than building one large core, which would be prohibitively expensive, we create multiple smaller cores, and spread them throughout the ship.

“Isn’t this the same technology those ‘primitive’ asari developed?”

These frigates are the largest human vessels to use a single core, the larger ships using several AI managed cores. To power all this, we have antimatter reactors onboard, easily creating enough power for our ships.”

“Aaah. I see.” Javik fell silent, before the Independence passed through the defense fleet. The whine of the jumpdrive spooling up sounded throughout the ship. Javik turned to ask a question, then the drive fired. Two beams flew out of the two cylinders attached to the sides of the ship, a portal opening up at the converging point. Javik’s jaw dropped again, as the portal expanded, and the human frigate flew into it, heading for Earth.

A/N: And everyone’s favorite prothean/ancient grouch makes his debut!

Except that the chapter isn’t really about Javik, who other than spouting off a few of his memes and delivering incredible torrents of exposition doesn’t really do anything to speak of in it. Instead, this is a chapter dedicated to Javik being impressed by the humans’ enormous throbbing spacecocks.

Just like how the turian-focused chapter wasn’t really about the turians, and the volus chapter wasn’t really about the volus.

Enjoy, and thank you for all the support. I never thought that this story would get more than 10 favs, let alone over 100!

That’s terrifying.

Thank you for the ongoing support and reviews of my work. I look forward to releasing more.

And, unfortunately, he did just that:

Chapter 11- Revelations

“Didn’t we already have a chapter called ‘Revelations’???”

FUUUUUCK!!! WE’RE CAUGHT IN A TIME LOOP!! THE ‘FIC WILL NEVER END!!!!

November 8th, 2160

Javik stood before the human senate. He had just given his speech, telling them about the reapers, sparing no detail.

“Unfortunately, we were spared all the detail.”

Hold up, it takes the humans three months to take over the entire Batarian Hegemony, but it takes Javik one month to give an emergency briefing on an immanent threat?

“Oh, and was the human governing assembly not called a ‘parliment’ before?”

The room was silent, all eyes in the room fixed on him. Then, a human senator stood up and spoke. “All in favor of preparing defenses against these reapers, say aye.”

The room filled with a chorus of Ayes from every senator in the room.

They actually have to vote verbally? Even the US Congress has buttons you can press.

Hundreds of humans began shouting, proposing actions that could be taken, others trying to restore order. Then, the president, an old man of 93, stood. The chamber quieted down.

“Our military is woefully under-manned at the moment to fight enemies in the numbers that our guest here,” He indicated Javik, “has claimed the reapers have. We must build more ships, and train more soldiers. We have been enjoying the boon of relative peace, and now we know that said peace is about to be shattered.

“The sort of peace that requires you to overturn governments and build the largest standing naval force in galactic history.”

All in favor of re-activating the Super-Dreadnought Program say Aye.”

“Aye” chorused many of the senators in the room, though a few showed concern at the money required.

“In addition, I propose that we offer our Batarian allies full membership of this senate. Once they do so, they will consider themselves full members of the United Earth Alliance, not just allies. Should that succeed, we will grant them representation on this senate, as well as begin refitting their fleet to our technological standard. We cannot win this coming war alone, so we must seek allies.

And I guess the batarians themselves just… don’t get a say in this.

Lovely.

“Very well. We will re-convene in a week’s time to discuss how we will defend against the reaper threat.” The president said, before turning, and leaving the room.

Once he had left the senate, president Raymond Deitrich hailed a cab, taking him to his private quarters. Once he arrived, the tipped the cab driver, then went inside.

So, they can build AI-controlled multicore dreadnoughts, but they can’t make self-driving cabs.

Also, another fucking dancestor.

Also, the President of the Systems Alliance (or whatever it’s called) goes from place to place in a cab.

He entered the ground floor bathroom, passing his hand over a seemingly normal tile on the wall.

“DNA Identification Verified. Please enter the password.” Chirped an AI.

“You know its me, Gordon, you don’t have to ask me that.” Deitrich replied.

“Password accepted. Welcome back, Mr. President.” Gordon replied, before the panels slid aside, revealing a small, claustrophobic elevator. It rapidly descended into a small, three room complex. Entering the door on his left, the president came before a large terminal.

“Gordon, patch me through to Vesta labs.” He said.

“Patching you through, Mr. President.”

Why is this in the president’s apartment and not his offices? Or better yet, why is there not a setup to make secure calls somewhere in the Senate/Parliament building itself?

“Hello? Mr. President, is that you?” A voice asked.

“Yes, Mr. Harper. I want you to activate the following projects: Aegis, Potential, Carnifex, Phalanx, Phantasm, and Unthinkable.”

“All right, I know that humans aren’t the best at naming things in general- see, ‘interplanetary combatives academy’- but this is just sad.”

“Unthinkable… dear god, what did that prothean tell you?”

“Horrible things.

“He has this story he wrote called ‘A Special Task’…”

If what he says is true, we will likely be facing a foe magnitudes above anything else this galaxy can muster against us.

“They might even be… over nine thousand!!”

I want to be prepared for when it happens.”

“But project Unthinkable… when would we ever need to force a star to go supernova?”

“If all else is lost, we must go out with a bang.”

“Compared to what the protheans did, that actually would not be especially helpful.”

“V-very well. I will authorize those projects. I hope you know what you’re doing.”

“Also, allocate additional funding and resources to projects Manifest Destiny, Andromeda, Mutation, Purge, and Yamato.

That point in the story where you cannot tell top-secret programs from movie sequel subtitles.

We’re just hit it.

If you need more money or resources, you only need to ask. This is not a time for petty profits. I would rather die penniless, on my deathbed, having lived a full life, rather than rich and to some ancient machine.

“You… do realize, Mr. President, sir, that money from these projects will come from the military budget and not from your personal account, correct?”

Maybe the Non-Systems Alliance is massively corrupt?

We must stand together to overcome the coming storm.”

That’s a lot of coming.

“I see. Will that apply to the council as well?”

“I hope, for their sake, that they will listen to Javik as we have. Otherwise, all is lost for them.”

“Very well. Will that be all?”

“It’s not like we could help or anything… that would just be silly.”

“Yes. Good day to you, Mr. Harper. Humanity, nay, the entire galaxy, depends on what you can do in those labs of yours.” The president cut the transmission, before turning, and walking back to the elevator.

Javik finished telling his tale, once again. However, this time, all the races of the council listened. Salarians, Turians, Asari, Volus, and even Hanar and Elcor.

You… uh… you left out the drell.

Actually, the entire story has completely left out the drell.

All said races had similar visages of shock on their faces when they heard the truth behind the fall of the protheans. The chamber was silent, then councilor Linron spoke.

“Wait, which Councilor is ‘Linron’?”

… I think this is supposed to be Verlin’s replacement. It, uhhh… it would’ve been nice if we’d been told before now that Verlin had stepped down. Or died. Maybe she died.

“That is impossible. There is no way that there could be that many reapers out there. We would have found them by now. Also, why would these reapers give us all these gifts? They could simply starve us out on our worlds while we struggle to escape overpopulation, or poison us with Bioweapons. A race of giant, sentient, immortal machines waiting in dark space coming in to cleanse the galaxy of life every fifty thousand years is nothing but the ravings of a lunatic.” The salarian councilor said.

“Are you blind and deaf Linron? We have a prothean, who has first-hand experience of what the reapers can do, and you’re dismissing it?” Sparatus said.

Well, actually, what you have is a prothean who says he has firsthand experience of what the Reapers did. For all you know spending fifty thousand years in a stasis pod has scrambled his brain and made him completely disconnected from reality- especially since his accounts of prothean society differ radically from all established theories of it. I’m not saying they should dismiss him out of hand, but without corroborating evidence (which the humans have, by the way, in the form of Object Rho, but are refusing to share) they shouldn’t accept his story out of hand either.

“For all we know, this is some genetically engineered abomination that the humans grew in a lab!

That too.

“Or just a human in an expensive suit.”

Besides, this council has faced threats before, and we have prevailed.”

“If all the lizard-people are all this stupid, we should just leave them for the reapers. With any luck, it would make the reapers too stupid to continue living.” Javik said, scorn clear in his voice. “I am surprised that your kind evolved at all. Back in my cycle, your people used to eat flies, and your raw liver was considered a delicacy.”

“Please, let us be reasonable.

“I don’t think there’s much chance of that.”

We may be able to negotiate with these reapers.” Tevos said.

“We attempted to. They ignored us. As soon as they entered through the citadel relay, they just opened fire. Our emperor was dead before we even knew we were under attack!”

“Aha! That proves you’re a fake! The protheans were a democracy, this council is even modeled after it! I have no reason to listen to anything you say, lab rat.” Linron crowed.

You know, where exactly are they getting this ‘the protheans were a democracy’ idea? It’s obviously not accurate, but it’s stood up under two thousand years of rigorous archaeological study and if they based the entire Council system off of it it would’ve had to have been fairly specific and detailed. How does that happen?

“You are an utter fool. The reapers are coming, and you salarians have your heads stuck so far up your cloacas that you can’t see the evidence directly in front of you! You salarians may do what you want, but we turians will begin preparations.” Sparatus shouted.

“The asari will begin as well. Production of the destiny class dreadnoughts has been approved.” Tevos said.

You know, a better story would have the salarians (who are the ones the Council typically sends out to investigate shit like this anyway) be the only ones who did believe Javik about the Reapers, forcing the humans to have to compromise with their hated enemy for the good of the entire galaxy.

“This is not a better story.”

“You people are fools. The salarian people do not wish to be a part of a council of utter morons, willing to listen to the ravings of a test tube creation! As of now, we no longer wish to be a part of this council!” Linron thundered, before storming out of the room. The occupants were shocked. The salarians, one of the founding council races, were gone.

“Umm…

…

…

…

Shouldn’t seceding from the Council require… well, a bit more premeditation than this?

Could she at least clear this with her superiors in the Union?”

The chamber devolved into chaos, with officials and dignitaries all shouting at each other, at the councilors. A decorative statuette was even thrown at Javik by one of the Salarians in the crowd, only for several hanar to pin him to the floor shortly after.

Ummm… what?

“Does Javik not have a security detail with him?”

Or is that what the hanar are for?

“Who has an all-hanar security detail?”

Who throws statues at protheans?

Chaos reigned in the council chambers, as the different races’ councilors made their exit. Javik left at the same time. A human transport was waiting for him, ready to take him away from the madness that was the council.

And into the rest of the madness that is A Special Task.

November 10th, 2160, Shanxi system

The hanar vessel ‘Glory of the Enkindlers,’ the first hanar dreadnought, entered the system.

“Really! And here I thought the hanar vessel ‘Glory of the Enkindlers’ would be the first elcor dreadnought.”

It approached the human spacedock, transmitting diplomatic codes. Once verified, a docking cradle opened, and the dreadnought slipped in, dwarfed by the freighters moving around it. Speaks with Eloquent Light, the Hanar ambassador, floated out. A small contingent of human soldiers met him and his group just outside.

“This one extends its humble greetings to the saviors of the last of the Enkindlers.” Speaks with Eloquent Light said.

“It is a pleasure to meet you. Ambassador Rozhenko will see you now.” One of the marines answered, before beckoning the hanar delegation to a skycar. Along the way, they drank a small amount of alcohol, as per the human custom. They were, however, careful not to get drunk.

…

“…”

…

“Don’t.”

Even.

“Start.”

As the skycar landed, they were met by several humans, and one prothean, in black suits. Ambassador Rozhenko spoke first. “Shall we proceed to negotiations?” He asked Speaks with Eloquent Light.

“This one believes so. There is nothing gained by waiting, if what the glorious Enkindler says is true.” Speaks with Eloquent Light answered.

Is the story going to continue to call the hanar ambassador by his full name the whole time??

“Very well.” The delegation made its way to a small room, a single table inside. The humans and prothean sat down, while the hanar floated over their respective seats.

“So what brings you here today?” Ambassador Rozhenko asked.

“This one humbly asks, on behalf of the Hanar illuminated primacy, if this one’s kind is allowed to join your kind’s council equivalent, like the Batarians have.”

“I do not see the problem with that. Humanity is always eager for new allies, and would gladly welcome you into the alliance Senate. However, I must ask why. Why join us, when you already have a place with the council?”

“This one was present when the glorious Enkindler delivered his warning, and this one witnessed the blasphemous response. The Hanar Illuminated Primacy wishes to join the ones who saved the last of the Enkindlers, and this one’s people wish to protect themselves against the ancient demons that destroyed the Enkindlers. Your people offer the best hope of survival, and this one’s people wish to join with the last of the Enkindlers in destroying the demons that continue to plague this galaxy.” Speaks with Eloquent Light replied.

This… actually makes a fair bit of sense. It reeks ominously of the Covenant, but in-universe it makes sense.

“Is this what the entire story is going to be like? Every three chapters the humans gain another member for their Alliance Which Clearly Will Not Then Subjugate The Rest Of The Galaxy?”

I am torn between blind terror that this will be incredibly boring, and applauding the author for finally finding something resembling a rudimentary structure to the story.

“Very well. You may join. I must now notify my government about this development.” Alexander Rozhenko said, as he exited the room. The UEA would be gaining yet another member race soon.

A/N- Here you go! Javik’s storyline is now complete.

And it kind of sucked.

The Quarians will come next,

I can hardly fucking wait.

however, I am still not sure about whether to include Shepard and the Normandy in this fic.

“You told us that the last time, too.”

I already have a vague idea about what to do should that happen, but I don’t know whether or not to include him. I will be posting another codex entry,

“Well, shit.”

this time about Vesta Labs Research projects, while you people vote on whether or not to include our old pal Shepard in this. Tomorrow, I will read the reviews about this chapter, and based on them, I will decide whether or not to include Shepard.

You gave your reviewers only 24 hours to provide their input? I was never a big fan of the ‘write by popular opinion’ school of outlining because you have to be able to discern crappy suggestions from decent ones (and most authors here, obviously, resoundingly fail to do that) and also because when one group of people have the majority half the time and another group have it the other half it makes the story inconsistent, but if you’re going to do that at least give the people who have real jobs a fighting chance to get their reply in!

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