1624: The Savior – Chapter Three

Title: The Savior
Author: bubbersgod
Media: Video Game
Topic: Dark Souls
Genre: Romance/Adventure
URL: Chapter Three
Critiqued by Leider Hosen

!!Warning!! Potential Rape Triggers. There is nothing explicit yet but anybody touchy about that should definitely be prepared to skim read. This Riff has officially reached NSFW territory.

And we’re back with another installment of The Savior. In case you weren’t here for last time’s shenanigans, here’s what you missed:

The author used his vast powers over the English language to tell us that Savior Stu is indeed the savior Lordran needs, and is vastly more special and better than all those other silly undead, including Sunbro Solaire, who would have stolen Savior Stu’s thunder thus was deleted from the fic entirely. This right after Savior Stu rescued a beloved canon character from his early demise, only for him to be offed one sentence later due to Savior Stu’s blinding idiocy.

We also saw Savior Stu engage in several harrowing battles, so harrowing in fact they could not be written at all and the very author himself had to tell us of them secondhand!

All these voids of nothing, and yet somehow I had so much to complain about, as we are truly working with a literary genius in fail.

To help keep me sane and offer his expert council, I have invited a very special guest to assist me in the following chapters.

-Off to the left a figure looking roughly 19 years of age puts his head in his hands, his expression faintly amused but mostly neutral. His skin is sickly with dark lines under his eyes, which are cat-like with rust-colored irises and a slit pupil that branches out on either side like tree branches. His hair is frayed, shoulder length, and sand colored, contrasting sharply against his crimson greatcoat with gold buttons-

Abrelepine: Hello. It’s good to finally come down off the rubbish heap after all these months.

Abrelepine Cord was the main antagonist of my first attempt at original fiction, which coincidentally I was working on at around the same time as I read this fiction. He’s grown a tremendous amount since his conception, though his personality is the same. He’s essentially my vision of pure evil, the result of nature vs nurture if “nature” was “bloodthirsty psychopath” and “nurture” was “driven to insanity, lost everything, and was abused by a corrupt religious institution”.

He’s an ultra-intelligent, ultra-violent psychopath, albeit with complex motives and personality-

Abrelepine: What was that you said about “show, don’t tell”, darling. You seem pretty fond of making facetious comments towards bubbers about it, yet here you are rattling endlessly about my own past. I was always your favorite <3

…I also made him entirely too Meta for his own good.

Abrelepine: You need my remarks on the nature of good and evil. That is the primary point of my existence, and you did love to write those.

Right you are! Now, let’s get started.

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