722: The Animagus Predator – Chapter 6

Title: The Animagus Predator
Author: Bijuui9
Media: Book / Movie
Topic: Harry Potter / Aliens/Predator Cross-Over
Genre: Romance / Sci-Fi
URL: The Animagus Predator
Critiqued by Ghostcat  

Hello, delightful Patrons, and welcome to the final (so far) chapter of Animagus Predator! Ishi-sensei sent a message a few minutes ago stating that he’s “indisposed” at the moment, so I’m all by my lonesome today.

It’s just me and thee, dear hearts. And this cheesecake I borrowed from the Library fridge. I’m thinking of calling it Phil.

:ninja materializes out of the Void:

:jumps: Bloody hell!

“Did you say ‘cheesecake’, Ghostcat-sama?”

I thought you were busy?

“There is no business more pressing than cheesecake.”

So that’s all it takes to summon a ninja? Dessert?

“All of the Bata no Ninja have a weakness for dairy goods.”

Fine, have a slice. I was hoping you’d stop by, there’s bound to be some medical-type stuff in this chapter since they just reached the medical bay at the end of the last segment.

So what else happened in the second half of the last chapter? A whole lot of nothing, that’s what. The group did eventually make it on to the ship and reached the medical bay, where Grimm stripped down to his skin and left his weapons in a pile on the floor. This means we’ve probably got more costume porn in our future.

“I can hardly wait.”

Stay strong, sensei.

The chapter starts off with … Oh, hell.

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716: The Animagus Predator – Chapter 5, Part 2

Title: The Animagus Predator
Author: Bijuui9
Media: Book / Movie
Topic: Harry Potter / Aliens/Predator Cross-Over
Genre: Romance / Sci-Fi
URL: The Animagus Predator
Critiqued by Ghostcat  (With special guest Ishi)

 

 

Ohayou, konnichiwa, and konbanwa, Patoron-san. I am called Ishi, humble physician of the Batā no Ninja.”

:Ishi bows:

 “And this is the honorable Ghostcat-sama.”

:Ghostie groans and sits up:

Dude, what the hell?

“Apologies, Ghostcat-sama. You were becoming agitated again.”

Damned right I was. This fic makes no frickin’ sense. :rubs back of head: But you could have just bolt-taped me to the floor. You didn’t have to knock me out again.

“You tackled me, screamed “Boku wa kusuguribakemono des’!”¹ into my face, and then pulled off my shoes.”

Oh-kay. It’s odd that I would use a male speech form, but that doesn’t sound like a good enough reason to render me unconscious, sensei.

“It was not your use of men’s speech, but what you did next.”

What’d I do?

“You bit me.”

I what?

“Repeatedly.”

:Ishi points to his foot, which is swathed in bandages:

Oh. Sorry. :bows: Gomen nasai.

“It is of little consequence. Shall we begin?”

Right, the riff. We should get on that. First up would be a summary of the first half of the chapter. Where are my notes?

:Ishi takes notes out of the trash can and hands them to Ghostie:

 So after an ungodly amount of Stu-stroking, Grimm removed the Xenomorph embryo from Lar’ja and nearly killed him in the process. After expending a vast amount of magical energy and getting an assist from Death Himself, Grimm predictably saved Lar’ja from the botched surgery and the Yautja will likely pull through.

“That seems quite brief given the length of the work covered.”

Well, once you trim out all the Stu-stroking you aren’t left with much.

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709: The Animagus Predator – Chapter 5, Part 1

Title: The Animagus Predator
Author: Bijuui9
Media: Book / Movie
Topic: Harry Potter / Aliens/Predator Cross-Over
Genre: Romance / Sci-Fi
URL: The Animagus Predator
Critiqued by Ghostcat 

 

Good [insert time of day here], insightful Patrons!

I’ve reluctantly returned with another chapter of Animagus Predator. After that confusing muddle we slogged through last time, things have to get better, right?

Right?

So what exactly happened last time? Beats the hell out of me, the lack of descriptive narration made it extremely hard to follow. From what I can piece together Harry Stu, A.K.A Grimm, ditched the humans (who, with the exception of Lex, have all died or vanished into the SDQF) and joined up with the Yautja. After various unbelievable feats of vaguely described badassery, Grimm and his new alien buddies reached the surface where Grimm managed to kill a Xenomorph Queen all by himself. If we are to believe his claims, this is the second time he’s done so.

Chapter Five begins with a short Author’s Note.

So next chapter, pretty soon after the fifth one but I figured it would be a nice reward for all those people who just started to follow my stories.

“Reward” isn’t exactly the word I would use to describe this fic.

Gods, my eail box is getting flooded with story follow and story favorite notifications. Not that I mind, I mean it’s a tad annoying, but it just means that people like my story.

The author displays the same “Woe with me, what a burden it is to be so popular!” trait that many Sues and Stus have. There are currently 120 positive reviews for this fic, and I’m sure most of those people are following it as well. It’s not a staggering amount of people, but the HP/AvP crossover market is a fairly specific niche so it wouldn’t attract a lot of readers anyway.

So here is chapter six, enjoy.

Doubtful.

WARNING: Gory detailed description of an operation, contains acid blood, Cetanu popping up and Harry digging into Lar’ja’s chest.

Wow. I think that’s the first time I’ve had a fic with disturbing content actually warn its readers that it contained disturbing content!

Here, have a redemption brownie.

I’m not sure just who “Cetanu” is supposed to be, but since it references “popping up” I’m going to assume that this is what the author has decided to call the Xenomorph embryo inside Lar’ja. Maybe Grimm & Co are going to keep it as a pet.

Since there appears to be some gory medical-type stuff in this chapter, I’ve asked Ishi-sensei, the clan’s resident doctor, to sit in with me. He should already be here, in fact…

:a ninja wearing a stethoscope materializes from the Void:

I really hate it when y’all do that.

:Ishi bows:

“Apologies for my lateness, Ghostcat-sama. Dragon-kun had someone caught between his teeth again.”

You mean “something”, right?

“…Hai.”

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702: The Animagus Predator – Chapter 4, Part 2

Title: The Animagus Predator
Author: Bijuui9
Media: Book / Movie
Topic: Harry Potter / Aliens/Predator Cross-Over
Genre: Romance / Sci-Fi
URL: The Animagus Predator
Critiqued by Ghostcat

 

 

How-do, dearest Patrons!

I’ve returned with the rest of Chapter Four! I know you are just simply thrilled all to pieces. Don’t worry, I brought glue!

:places jug of unidentified liquid on desk:

At least, that’s what I’m claiming this is if anyone affiliated with the ATF comes nosing around.

So what happened in the first half? Lots of clothing porn and very little else. Harry Stu, who now goes by the Awesome McCoolname of Grimm, is hired by Weyland Industries as a mercenary/travel guide despite that fact that he possesses nearly three-quarters of a trillion dollars in cash. After the aforementioned costume porn, Grimm and the cast from Alien vs Predator arrive at a pyramid located under the pack ice on an island near Antarctica. Grimm half-heartedly tries to “protect” the group, but reasons that there’s not much point in doing so as they are all as good as dead anyway.

Cue the faint screams of the dying in three… Two… One…

He narrowed his eyes as he heard faint screams in the distant.

:yawns:

Oh, no – the characters I couldn’t give a damn about are dying. What a tragedy. I might be a little more concerned if you hadn’t just told us they were going to die. That shit kind of takes the sting out of the blow, you know.

‘Well looks like the hunting party has arrived. That means the people outside are very much dead by know.

:waves:

Good-bye, unknown number of secondary characters. I envy you.

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695: The Animagus Predator – Chapter 4, Part 1

 

 

Title: The Animagus Predator
Author: Bijuui9
Media: Book / Movie
Topic: Harry Potter / Aliens/Predator Cross-Over
Genre: Romance / Sci-Fi
URL: The Animagus Predator
Critiqued by Ghostcat

 

Hello, gracious Patrons!

Today I’m revisiting an old favorite of mine, The Animagus Predator. This infamous fic is one I first started way back in the early days of the Library, in 2012. So imagine my surprise when, after all this time, I find the author has posted another three (very long) chapters!  This fic has long been one of my “favorites”, mostly because it is one of the most bizarre things I’ve ever read – and I’m a Librarian.

Let that sink in for a minute.

Like a few of the early chapters, some of these are very long and will be divided into more manageable bites. Speaking of the earlier chapters – you can read the earlier riffs here, but if you don’t feel like clicking through I can give you the Cliff Notes version.

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