22: Music Child – Chapter Five

Title: Music Child
Author: Writer.of.the.gods
Media: Book and/or Movie
Topic: Harry Potter
Genre: Adventure/Humor is what it’s listed as…
URL: Music Child: Chapter Five
Critiqued by Lyle

Chapter Five: The Dream

Dun dun dun!

This chapter starts with an author note that declares that this chapter “adds a clue to Miv and why she is soo important!”  *cringes*  Oh, goody… I can’t wait to find out.

After some babble thanking reviewers for kind words – I checked the reviews and was shocked by the positive ‘this are awesomes’ listed there – she ends the author note with a flabbergasting disclaimer.

I don’t own Harry Potter cuz Dumbledore ain’t a Slytherin and Voldmort will risk his own life to save MuggleBorns

What?  Oh, never mind… Let’s just get to the story.

It starts with Dumbledore abusing his magical powers for the sake of the spoiled brat… again.  He charms her instruments so they don’t need to be plugged in, then shrinks them into a sort of charm-bracelet that, when rubbed, will make her instruments enlarge and become useable.  I can already see my newly inserted Mary-Sue (I’ve totally created one just so I can mentally play with our over-done heroine.  Take every Mary-Sue stereotype and that’s her!) running up behind her every chance she gets and rubbing all the charms simultaneously, then fleeing before she’s seen.  BWAHAHAHA!

A-hem.

Anyway, Dumbley-dore does a whole heck of a lot of charming in order to fit all her crap into her trunks.  We’re given a rundown of what all Mivvy brings with her, but I don’t find it terribly important.  The only thing of note is that she names a couple very specific, very expensive electronic items (all of which were put out either this year or last… HG Wells strikes again!) that Dumbledore charms to never run out of juice.  Somewhere, someone in the Ministry of Magic’s Misuse of Muggle Artifacts department is having a cow over the sudden abuse of non-magical items and banging his head on a desk because it’s all Dumbledore, and you don’t mess with Dumbledore.  If he wants to fly his broom naked through Time Square, you damn well let him do it.

Moving right along, we continue the idea that Author has no consideration for canon because Dumbledore teaches MinMin the charm to reduce her guitars back down to bracelet jewelry.  Because 11 year old witches with no prior training can grasp complex spells like that without any idea how to use their magic.  But hey… Minnie is soo important!  She also learns Reparo and Alohamora in this span of time, although she just calls it “how to Repair things, and unlock things.”

Her mom returns and tells her she’s going out with Steve that evening to a movie, and they won’t be back until tomorrow.  Based on the amount of time they’ll be gone, I’m guessing they’re going to be watching the entire extended editions of all three Lord of the Rings movies.  Knowing how chronologically correct this fic is, that would make the most sense.  Oh, wait… Mother-Dearest does explain why they won’t be back that night.  *puts a pillow on her desk in preparation for the inevitable headdesk*  You may want to take the same precaution.  Just saying.

” And going to be back in the morning for we are going to a friends after and probably getting drunk.. so be good.”

Wow, Mom.  Ca-lass-ay.

Mom leaves and Dumbledore tells Mivnervia to be ready to go by 9 tomorrow and he’ll come retrieve her.  For some random reason, she calls him “Apple” and then is left to her own devices for the rest of the evening.

Dream sequence!  *does the Wayne’s World whoodly-woo they do when they rewind the film for alternative endings.  Rent it if you have no idea what I’m doing.  I’ll wait.  ….  Welcome back.  Got the image?  Good…. Whoodly-woo!*

She’s in a field of flowers that are growing musical notes that start adhering to her like a sock to a shirt when you forget to use a dryer sheet.  This gives her a feeling of power!

 She felt powerful, like she could take down a big, dangerous man with no problem, with the power of Music. Miv was confused. She loved music like no other, but, WTH? What was all of this? Then a voice whispered in her ear,” Claim yourself soon, and open up like the Full Moon.” The voice then started singing a soft lullaby.

Why am I suddenly reminded of Care Bears…

Then we’re treated to a poorly written lullaby.  Would you like to read it?  Sure you would!

Oh the full moon
makes you swoon.

Makes you want to dance,
and pretend you are perfect.

You stare and stare
till’ you fall asleep
and dream how you will bare
the New Moon.

Sounds like campy 80’s love song lyrics to me.  Where’s Brian Adams when you need him?  Oh, right… making music that doesn’t suck this much.  My apologies.

After more mysterious whisperings from a disembodied voice, Min learns she needs to open up her feelings so her true power can emerge.

End on a pointless author note.  Perfection!

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