Hello hello all you Patrons, and welcome back to The Lone Wolf of the Normandy.
“Last time after wandering around doing basically nothing for most of the chapter, Spartan took off his armor for an out-of-nowhere medical exam which revealed that- surprise, surprise!- he looks like a male model. After that everybody went back to the Citadel station and met up with that Jun guy, and yet another Spartan named Jorge got shit out of Slipspace ‘somewhere in the Terminus’. And that, really, was about it.”
Show and Tell Counter: 38
Amorous Counter: 111
Collateral Douchebag Counter: 21
Title: Five Nights at Freddy’s x reader character x character oc x oc
Media: Video Game
Topic: Five Nights at Freddy’s (allegedly)
URL Chapter 1
URL Chapter 2
Critiqued by Ghostcat
—CONTAINS GRAPHIC SCENES INVOLVING SELF-HARM AND REFERENCES TO SUICIDE—
Hello, dear Patrons!
Are you ready for another oneshot? And this one’s a Reader fic! From the Five Nights at Freddy’s canon!
:waits patiently for the screams to subside:
Now that you’ve gotten that out of your system, let’s move on to the first chapter.
It’s not really a chapter, though, just a long form of some kind.
Here is the form
See what I mean?
If it’s oc x oc (Do this for both of them)
If it’s character x oc
Character (That your oc has a crush on)-
If it’s character x character
Now, I’m familiar with the standard abbreviations used in Reader fics (like [h/c] for hair color) but this is far more extensive. Not only is the author asking the audience to provide physical characteristics, but also things like their personality, their love interest, even an antagonist. The audience is, in essence, being told to write a full character and plot summary before they begin the fic. If the audience is going to do all of this, what’s left for the author to do?
It is quite telling that the versions for canon characters don’t ask for as much information, since presumably the only thing you need to describe a canon character’s personality and appearance is just their name.
On to the first and only chapter! It’s titled Bonnie x Reader-Loving you is suicide, which is setting off all sorts of alarm bells. Read the rest of this entry »
Hello, Patrons, and welcome to the final chapter!
:does Last Chapter Dance:
For now, anyway. There’s been no activity on the fic for several years, but it’s not listed as completed so there’s always a chance the author will update it.
Most of the last chapter was dedicated to an extended flashback featuring a large group of campers who were attacked by a Spanish witch flinging around pixie dust who forced at least two of the campers to eat human flesh and causing them to transform into wendigoes. (The flashback doesn’t really even show the transformations, just that at least two people were forced to eat human flesh that had been doctored with a strange powder and afterwards they convulsed in pain and blacked out.) There was also something about “helping her son”, but that wasn’t really touched on very much before Spanish Witch started chopping up people with an axe. The whole thing was supposed to explain something about the wendigoes, but it really just raised more questions.
Onward to the fic!
Welcome back, dear Patrons! We’re nearing the end of this fic, I can almost see the light at the end of the tunnel. And it looks like I’ll be finishing in time to do a few holiday oneshots, just like last year!
Well, probably not exactly like last year. I can only deal with so much sibcest.
So what happened in the last chapter? Slendpai showed up in Thaddeus’ room and engaged in a bit of inappropriate groping featuring a lot of nipple action, and Thaddeus seemed very confused about the entire incident.
That was pretty much it; the content of the chapters is getting sparser and sparser, which is another sign that the author may be losing interest in the fic.
To the fic!
Warning: the following chapter is not for those who can get easily sick to their stomach.
Oh, dear gods. That’s ominous.
It’s goer ish… well not really hahaha
I think that’s meant to be “gore-ish”, or gory if you want the actual word, which is making me very reluctant to continue reading this chapter.
Note: The italicized paragraphs means you’re reading a memory… you’ll see what I mean.
You know when would have been a good time to explain that? In the last chapter, where a good third of the work was a memory/dream sequence!
— CONTAINS NIPPLES—
Welcome back to another chapter, Patrons!
The last chapter was mostly a very protracted fight sequence between Slendpai and the three wendigoes which resulted in the dismemberment of Christmas Moose (which is a shame because I really liked that nickname) and the revelation that Slendpai is vulnerable to Horned Gollum’s hypnosis power even though he doesn’t have any frickin’ eyes.
I’ve salted the rafters with mines and posted mercenary squirrels in the vents and ninjas in the hallway so I think I’m safe from Syl and the Society of Smut. Probably. Those girls are harder to get rid of than crabgrass.
To the fic!
Huh. The last couple of chapters didn’t have a beginning Author’s Note so I had assumed the trend would continue. Looks like I was wrong.
The author is Phone Guy?
SO here is the next chapter! I didnt really care to fix mistakes.
Wait, does that mean you’ve been correcting your errors? Because I haven’t seen a lot of evidence to support that claim.
I made read this, she found it humorous.
Think you proper noun there.
Idk if that;s a good thing XD
That would all depend on [ERROR:NAME NOT FOUND]’s sense of humor, since comedy is a very subjective thing. Many people find clowns funny, but there are also many people who find them terrifying.
Given that the quality of your writing appears to have degraded quite sharply from the last chapter, I find that unlikely.
Title: I’ll protect you
Media: Video Games
Topic: Slender: The Eight Pages
URL: Chapter 7
Critiqued by Ghostcat
Happy Black Friday, beloved Patrons! I hope you’re enjoying and/or enduring America’s annual Festival of Consumerism.
The last chapter featured quite a lot of awkward face-grabbing and snuggling that I’m desperately trying to forget, so let’s move directly into this chapter!
Slender Man P.O.V.
Huh. Looks like we’re sliding right into Slendpai again. I think the lack of prefacing Author’s Notes may be a sign that the author is starting to lose enthusiasm for her fic.
A howl, no, a loud roar came from the forest.
So which was it? Those are two very different sounds.
A low growl erupted from my throat. The pesky creatures have returned to the town.
Oh, no! They might try to do stuff WITH THINGS!
I slowly propped myself up on my elbows, careful not to wake Thaddeus, and listened closely to the passing wind outside the house.
Stop listening to the house farting and concentrate on the howl-roar, dude.
—CONTAINS SCENES OF EXCESSIVE CUDDLING—
Hello, dear Patrons!
I hope you were having an enjoyable timepart, because I’m here with another chapter. Sorry about that.
In the previous chapter Thaddeus revealed his sassy bitch side while sniping with his sister before he decided to follow the anime trope path even further and make some home-baked goodies for Slendpai. Thaddeus ventured out to the store for ingredients to make apple tarts and had a brief yet awkward social encounter with Carlos, who is definitely suffering from a severe case of the hots for Thaddeus. Immediately after leaving the store Thaddeus was attacked by Designated Asshole Gerald, who threatened both Thaddeus and Slendpai before releasing the little sorrow sponge. Thaddeus panicked and ran off into the forest to find Slendpai, and to exactly no one’s surprise he became completely lost. He stumbled across a creature the narration later purported to be a wendigo, but was never attacked or even threated by the beast because Slendpai swooped in to rescue Thaddeus.
Thus far their relationship consists of Slendpai stalking Thaddeus and then rescuing the boy when he inevitably gets attacked by someone or something.