Suggestion Box

This is the place to leave your fic suggestions for future snarking!  Before posting please make sure you check out our current orphan list to see if the fic is already on there.  You can find a read-only version of that list here:

Orphan Fics

When making a suggestion, please comment with it to this page.  Please include the title, source(s) the fic is based on, a URL, and some explanation on why you think the fic is so bad in your comment.  If you want you can use this handy little submission form for your comment:

Title:
Source(s):
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Note: All comments on this page will be deleted periodically when submissions are screened and added to our orphan fic list.


24 Comments on “Suggestion Box”

  1. SuperFeatherYoshi says:

    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12721688/1/A-song-of-Ice-Fire-and-Tiberium

    A Mary Sue most-likely-self-insert character gets a whole bunch of bullshit powers from the Command & Conquer universe, then gets reincarnated in the Game of Thrones universe. Really, this is less “C&C/Game of Thrones crossover” and more “God Mode Sue in Game of Thrones”, given how little presence C&C actually has in this story.

  2. SuperFeatherYoshi says:

    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12491708/1/Command-and-Conquer-Red-Alert-3-Blue-Steel

    Was planning on snarking this myself, but I’ll probably never have time to finish this given how busy I am with uni right now. So I’m putting it up for anyone to take a shot at. (In the unlikely event that nobody riffs this in the next 2~3 years, I’ll probably get off my lazy ass, actually watch Arpeggio of Blue Steel, and finish what I started)

    Anyway, the badfic: canon defilement (the Soviet Union taking orders from FutureTech, who are their mortal enemies in the game), childish characters (there’s a scene where it’s literally just the three main characters yelling “Fuck you!” at each other), ridiculous lack of common sense (a Japanese warship named “the Yakuza”, which makes about as much sense as an US Navy ship named “USS Mafia”), horrible lack of even the most basic of naval knowledge (C&C style weapons design aside, the author couldn’t even get the IJN battleship’s naming scheme straight).

    So yeah, a treasure trove right here.

  3. SuperFeatherYoshi says:

    https://www.fimfiction.net/story/172422/the-conversion-bureau-tiberium-wars

    Pretty much a one-sided curbstomp of evil!ponies by the humans…Except the author, in a misguided attempt to make the story seem like it’s not complete human wank (it is), threw in some absolutely ridiculous defeats for the human side, like airships somehow blasting supersonic fighters out of the skies with cannons.

  4. SuperFeatherYoshi says:

    https://www.fimfiction.net/story/68250/bad-endings-awesome-beginnings

    Pretty much every bad MLP fanfic cliche all rolled into one: “badass”, TRAJIK protagonist with a bunch of guns, ponies being hostile to him for no good reason, Gary Stu, Wish Fulfillment, and worst of all, having hundreds of upvotes despite all that.

  5. Butters says:

    https://www.fanfiction.net/~lampi01
    Person writes awful Brave Little Toaster fanfics, their story a has magical girl lamp with breasts and a vagina that can magically change humans into appliances…If that doesn’t scream Mary-Sue, I don’t know what does. I’ve heard they have a bit of an ego on DeviantArt also, going by the same name. Their stories consist of nothing but filler and pointless dialogue. Claims the “B-movie Appliances” as her own.

    • SuperFeatherYoshi says:

      “their story a has magical girl lamp with breasts and a vagina that can magically change humans into appliances”

      …That is officially the strangest sentence I’ve ever read in my life.

      • agigabyte says:

        Yeah, same here.

        When someone who’s read smut involving “the feeling of his penis” can say that, you may have fucked up.

        • GhostCat says:

          Meanwhile, I’m wondering if it’s the magical girl-lamp that can change humans into appliances, or if it’s just the magical girl-lamp’s vagina that has the ability. Like, do the humans have to be in contact with the magical girl-lamp’s vagina to get transformed?

        • agigabyte says:

          Is it bad that I assumed the latter?

        • SuperFeatherYoshi says:

          I did too.

        • AdmiralSakai says:

          Meanwhile, I’m wondering if it’s the magical girl-lamp that can change humans into appliances, or if it’s just the magical girl-lamp’s vagina that has the ability. Like, do the humans have to be in contact with the magical girl-lamp’s vagina to get transformed?

          I wasn’t imagining contact being required, I was imagining something more similar to “I’ma firin my lazor”.

  6. The Pita for 2018 , CRB says:

    All of these have been sporked / MST-ed at Das Sporking already ( years ago ) but maybe you’ll take them ?

    The first is a Nightmare on Elm Street story featuring a Mary Sue ( complete with curves , pale skin color and purple eye color AND lemon scenes with Freddy himself . )

    Second and third are Aladdin stories and the main female character is a Mary Sue best friend of Jasmine . Jasmine , btw , is involved in a love triangle with Aladdin AND Jafar ( you can easily guess who she chooses )
    The Mary Sue ends up with Genie .
    Also , Genie has sisters Loud , wild , crazy , usually annoying and obnoxious sisters .

    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5281687/1/He-Knew-Her-Then

    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8662619/1/Mysterious-Love-Notes

    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8662668/1/An-Unexpected-Surprise

  7. Corpse Party Reform
    Made by Xpyro125
    https://m.fanfiction.net/s/10567574/1/Corpse-Party-Reform-Immortalized-Rewrite

    Well, there’s lot of bad grammar, and bad plot. Nothing much to say here.

  8. joshingblock says:

    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11509680/1/Mass-Effect-An-AU-Retelling

    It’s pretty awful, bad grammar with a story that goes nowhere.

    • SuperFeatherYoshi says:

      My Shepard will be both War Hero and Ruthless covering both events.

      War flashbacks…

    • AdmiralSakai says:

      The softcore Poser porn as the title image is a nice touch.

  9. Zues Killer Productions says:

    https://trollpasta.wikia.com/wiki/Let%27s_Play!

    A story that features a Jeff!Link, sexual fantasies of a creepy pervert, and a protagonist who likely had a stunted upbringing.

    WARNING: This “creepypasta” contains rape, and lots of it. Also, there’s severe retardation involving the protagonist.

  10. Henry V. says:

    Subnautica: The Truth
    Written by Subnautical
    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11879733/1/Subnautica-The-Truth
    Author manages to take Subnautica, utterly skewer its message, and then turn it into…SOMETHING involving massive mechs and fish families.

  11. Joey jo-jo Shabadoo says:

    Title: New Universe Three: The Friendship Virus
    Written by Chatoyance
    URL: https://www.fimfiction.net/story/14351/3/the-conversion-bureau-brand-new-universe/new-universe-three-the-friendship-virus
    Comments: My Little Pony in name only A oneshot scenario in a fic of oneshot scenarios. This is a chapter written by a misandric misanthrope, and boy does it show. It is creepy and unsettling, and an insult to guys every. There is no love and tolerate to be found here.

  12. AdmiralSakai says:

    Title: PikaSemeChu
    Written by Yassa
    http://pikasemechu.smackjeeves.com/
    Comments: If you think the title tells you everything you need to know about this Pokemon fancomic, think again. The Bad Webcomics Wiki claims that

    In an ironic twist, this material, which would normally get an “Atomic Bomb” rating, is too ineptly done to really be shocking.

    and

    once you’ve gotten over the incredibly inappropriate themes in PikaSemeChu, you’ll be bored to tears by it

    Therefore, due to my own bad experience with Love of a Spartan and other padding-fests, I am flagging it as a potential Librarian-breaker.

  13. Lewonx says:

    Title: Vegeta’s Hit List
    Source(s): Dragon Ball Z/Multiple
    URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/1970368/1/Vegeta-s-Hit-List
    Comments:
    Comletely OOC god mode stu Vegeta travels through multiverse and kills random characters that author doesn’t like. Character bashing in the fic itself comes with a bonus of critic bashing in the author’s notes.

  14. Lewonx says:

    Title: The combines reckoning
    Source(s): Sonic the Hegehog/Half Life
    URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5660076/1/The-combines-reckoning
    Comments:
    A nonsensical crossover, written in walls of text, that somehow inserts a bunch of Sonic OCs in the story of Half Life 2.

  15. HonestR says:

    Title: A New Island: Fallen Kingdom
    Source(s): How to Train Your Dragon/Jurassic Park
    URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12977884/1/A-New-Island-Fallen-Kingdom
    Comment:
    I have two stories by this author I wanted you guys to look at, let’s start with this one. An HTTYD fic that takes place around the final season of their Netflix series that’s about Hiccup and his friend discovery a lost island of dinosaurs, but then immediately turns into a complete remake of Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom despite if the plot makes any sense or not in the time of Vikings. I’m serious, this story one of the laziest yet baffling reads I’ve ever sat through such as…

    – Hiccup and friends finding a dragon eye lens in the wall of their hideout. No extraordinary means of doing so, it’s just there because the plot demands it.
    – The riders get knocked off their dragons by a Mosasaur (somehow) and, instead of getting back on their dragons to fly beyond its reach, they swim all the way to safety, and it works.
    – They meet a red-head girl who just so happens to be named Claire who rides on a Skrill. A dragon that produces electricity and rubber hasn’t even been invented yet.
    – The island is apparently a safe haven where dragons and dinos live in peace. Even dragons that are known to be super aggressive are powerless against its charm like the slitherwings (a snake-like dragon whose body is covered in poison).
    – Claire says that she sees Night Furries come and go on the island, therefore killing all whole drama with Toothless possibly being the last of his kind.
    – Despite this whole story being set before the events of Jurassic Park, there is a raptor on the island which bears a striking resemblance to Blue all the way down to her having no feathers and a blue stripe (even though she only has those stripes because the gap in her DNA was filled in with monitor lizard).
    – Hiccup is immediately fascinated with Blue, because the plot demands it, and wants to meet her also because the plot demands it.
    – Claire and the other rider get trapped in a cave by the villains, and it’s only after being attacked by a baryonyx before Claire remembers she has a ladder installed in the cave for escape. Why didn’t they use it immediately you may ask. Well, then we wouldn’t be able to re-enact the scene from the movie.
    – There are several trivia of dinosaurs except for the baryonyx because if that were to happen then the author would have to say it’s a fish-eater and then we couldn’t re-enact the movie.
    -The island’s decided to just full-on erupt despite there being no signs earlier.
    – The rider performs a successful blood transfusion to save Blue from being shot in the leg with a simple arrow. I repeat, Vikings perform a successful blood transfusion on a dinosaur! And yes they do the same thing where they need to get blood from a T-rex (even though in this version, Blue isn’t the only raptor on the island or who was captured) because that’s how it happened in the movie.

    In case I’m not making it clear, because of the author being so uninspired as to recreate everything in Fallen Kingdom, even if it doesn’t make any sense based on the time period, this story commits the cardinal sin of storytelling. Instead of the characters driving the plot because of their action, consequences, or motivation, the plot drives the characters to do what it wants even if they wouldn’t do such thing in this fashion. Because of this, not only are the good parts of the movie are retold poorly, but the bad parts of the film are told even worse. The only appealing thing about the story is to see just how far this author would go with this premise. Just in case anyone was interested.

  16. Lewonx says:

    Title: Fight for the 7 Chaos and Shikon No Tama
    Source(s): Sonic the Hegehog/Inuyasha/Mortal Kombat/Literally everything
    URL:https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3954079/1/Fight-for-the-7-Chaos-and-Shikon-No-Tama
    Comments:
    What starts of as a stupid Sonic, Inuyasha and Mortal Kombat crossover soon turns into the most ambitious fighting tournament fic with the most insane cast of fighters imaginable. It features such matches as Tony Montana vs Inuyasha, Tails vs Randy Orton and Ermac vs Homer simpson. Characters constanly cheat and nobody gives a fuck about it, Cream the Rabbit gets shiped with a real life wrestler and some of the wins are ridiculous and make no sense. And from looking at the autor’s profile he’s not a troll and the fic is 100% serious.


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