1551: Sonic.exe/Round Two – Part Two

Title: Sonic.exe/Round 2
Author: JC-The-Hyena
Media: Video Game
Topic: Sonic the Hedgehog
Genre: Creepypasta
URL: Trollpasta Wiki Rehost
Critiqued by Admiral Sakai and Nina

Hello hello, all you patrons. Digitize your animation tests and keep your Necronomicons in the upright and locked position, because it’s that time again

Last time on Sonic.exe/Round 2 (have I mentioned what a stupid fucking title that is?), we were introduced to the World’s Worst Detective, Derek Green, who had been tasked with investigating a string of apparent homicides caused by people playing Sonic.exe (the game, not the pasta) and subsequently succumbing to its terrible writing terrible curse.

“Except for the part where the humans who played it weren’t really dead, they’d just had their souls removed and sucked into the Sonic game world to be enslaved by the Demonhog… except for the parts where they were actually dead because JC-The-Hyena forgot what the glub he was doing.”

Opposing Derek was an organization calling itself the Cult Of X, I guess because The Obviously Evil and Clearly Working With Demonic The Hedgehog Foundation was already taken or something, who had somehow managed to co-opt the Chief of Police into covering their tracks- that, or he’s just doing his goddamn job.

Assisting Derek is his nameless, faceless, rankless ‘boss’ (who is a different person from the Chief of Police and doesn’t seem to report to him in any capacity)…”

… a source inside the Cult Of X named Cole who doesn’t actually seem to know anything verifiable and has to be told most of what’s going on…

“ and- until recently- his crechemate/partner Chelsea.”

Who, I might add, just managed to get herself (un?)killed by doing the absolute stupidest possible thing and playing the copy of Sonic.exe she found instead of telling anyone about it or turning it in to the crime lab for analysis.

And, glubbing finally, we get to stick a culling fork in this glubber, because Sonic.exe/Round 2 is almost glubbing done.”

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1543: Sonic.exe/Round Two – Part One

Title: Sonic.exe/Round 2
Author: JC-The-Hyena
Media: Video Game
Topic: Sonic the Hedgehog
Genre: Creepypasta
URL: Trollpasta Wiki Rehost
Critiqued by Admiral Sakai and Nina

Hello hello, all you patrons. Grab your spiked shoes with spikes on the bottom and keep your hands (tentacles) off that shotgun, because it’s that time again

Today… wow.

I hadn’t thought it possible, but JC-The-Hyena has somehow lost whatever miniscule iota of coherent thought he once possessed. If it weren’t for the fact that this has been confirmed to be the official sequel I’d never have reviewed it, on the ground that it was obviously the work of some extremely dedicated troll with a massive hateboner for the entire creepypasta genre who wanted it shamed off the Internet as quickly as possible.

C’mon, how bad can it possibly be?”

You wouldn’t be asking that if you’d sat through the last one.

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