How to Not End Up in the Library: Your Title Sucks

Hello once again, patrons! There’s no riff for today (or rather, we haven’t had the chance to format and schedule the ones we have received), so I’m back with another dose of probably-unhelpful advice!

You know, you’d think the title of a story would be hard to get wrong. It’s short, simple, and not directly part of the narrative.

So it’s really incredible how many people have found varied and complex ways of screwing it up. So many, in fact, that we had to implement an entire Sucktastics category for it just last year. So how do you not only Not End Up in the Library, but Not End Up Nominated for That Particular Sucktastick Awards Category?

(My condolences to The Power of TheeInstant Death DiseaseCoD: Black Hell OpsChristmas Eve No pun intended xD, and yandere gamzee x reader- the phantom of the school for their nominations.)

Rule One: Stop Editorializing (lol, kinda XD)

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How to Not End Up in the Library: Dis Displacement-Dissing Dissertation/Discussion Disservice — Self-Insertion and Displacement ‘Fics

So, I was going to post something from my Massive Pile Of Fem!Elite Fics (why oh why do I still have a Massive Pile Of Fem!Elite Fics?) to start off my vacation from The First War, but this kind of hit me in a flash of inspiration and so we’re doing that instead.

What exactly is “that”, though? A discussion of two very common -and very commonly reviled– tropes-slash-genres in fanfiction, the self-insertion and the displacement.

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How to Not End Up in the Library: On Self-Insert and Power Fantasies, the Common Pitfalls of Fanfiction

Howdy, folks! Been a little while, hasn’t it? No, I’m not quite “back” yet – I’m mostly just working on oneshots right now to try and get myself back into the spirit of riffing – but I am coming out of the woodwork for a brief moment.

Hey, you know what we haven’t done in a while? One of these. You know what topics we haven’t covered yet, but have become relevant as of late? Self-Insert fics.

“But, SC! You’re covering two topics!”

Yep, the title gives that away. The power fantasy, a.k.a. claiming to have invincibility armor during a game of tag which means that you aren’t “it.” (Yeah, come here, we’ll see how “invincible” that armor is once I’m done knocking your ass out, you little cheatin’ shit…) As I’ll be demonstrating in a moment here, it’s pretty necessary that I go over both of these, as the two are somewhat connected to one another.

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2264: They Chose To Remain — A Retrospective

Title: They Chose to Remain
Author: AdmiralSakai
Media: Film
Topic: Jame’s Cameron’s Avatar
Genre: Adventure/Sci-Fi/Author Tract
URL: DeviantArt Gallery Page
Critiqued by AdmiralSakai

Yes, you read that correctly, I am indeed riffing an old shame of mine. Or, well, not riffing, exactly, because for reasons I will be getting into below this thing is a potential Librarian-breaker and I am extremely disinclined to do a full riff of it. I’ve actually been considering bringing it onto LotD for a good long while now, but due to its aforementioned unriffability I wasn’t entirely sure how to go about doing that until I saw HerrWozzek’s retrospective on Mass Vexations and decided I liked that format. If someone does want to riff it the link is in the page header and I can also put it in the orphaned-fics table, but you are a braver soul than I and I can already predict you are unlikely to see the far side of the thing. So let’s go ahead and dive into They Chose to Remain (Or, Why Getting An A In AP Computer Science Does Not Make You Isaac Asimov (You Self-Righteous Fuckwit)).

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How to Not End Up in the Library: What is a Mary Sue? – The BatJamags Take

[Filler post for today. We’ll be back with your regularly scheduled madness tomorrow.]

I’ve titled this post to allow the other Librarians the chance to present their own interpretations, since I know not everybody uses my definition. “Mary Sue” is a term that’s been thrown around a lot since before the internet even existed. It’s been used, reused, and in many cases roundly mocked. There’s no one definition that encompasses every use of the term, so I’m actually less interested in defining it and more in defending why I rely on the definition that I do. I’ll start at the end and show you what I’d use as a dictionary definition:

“A Mary Sue is a character in a work of fiction who receives unjustified special treatment or attention from the narrative.”

So, I had a few concerns I wanted this definition to cover:

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How to Not End Up in the Library: The Brave, the Bold, and the Bad – The Art of the Crossover

This post is about crossovers! And gratuitous superhero-related references, complete with handy dandy wiki links!

Terrible crossovers are one of our favorite targets here in the Library, and it’s high time we broke down the makings of a good one and addressed some of the bigger pitfalls we’ve seen.

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How to Not End Up in the Library: Eat Your SPaGhetti, Children

“SC! What gives? This isn’t that OC-making tip you traded Bats for!”

You’re right: it’s not. That’s because I feel like, with my current riff, this is a topic that needs addressing now, rather than later on down the line. Oh sure, the OCs in that fic are shit too, so I could have gone either direction, but considering my terrible habit of just not writing my riffs, I suspect it won’t be too long before I have the OC one done and ready to go.

However, for today, we’re going to focus on a facet of writing which is of critical importance if you want anybody to take your story seriously: spelling and grammar.

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