1885: Fazbear Q & A – Chapters 4 & 5

 

Title: Fazbear Q & A
Author: Lolita Westmore
Media: Video Game
Topic: Five Nights at Freddy’s
Genre: Humor/Supernatural
URL Chapter 4
URL Chapter 5
Critiqued by Ghostcat

 

Hello, and welcome back to this odd little fic! Not a whole lot happened in the last three chapters, most of which could summarized as ‘stuff happened, little of it related to the source materials’, and I assume the trend will continue.

I don’t own the FNAF series. Just the storyline and Baby.

As we’ve covered extensively in the past, you do NOT need to add disclaimers to a fic – especially not the same exact disclaimer to every blasted chapter.

Ninety years without slumbering (tick, tock, tick, tock), his life’s seconds numbering (tick, tock, tick, tock), it stopped short –never to go again- when the old man died.”

If those look like song lyrics, it’s because they are; specifically the chorus from a very old song called “My Grandfather’s Clock”, which is what the Marionette’s music box plays to keep it quiet. Gold star to the author for that obscure bit of FNAF trivia.

The comforting tinkles of the music box filled a room littered with toys and posters, virtually untouched by time.

This isn’t going to be like one of those artsy ASMR videos, is it?

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1879: Fazbear Q & A – Chapters 1 -3

 

Title: Fazbear Q & A
Author: Lolita Westmore
Media: Video Game
Topic: Five Nights at Freddy’s
Genre: Humor/Supernatural
URL Chapter 1
URL Chapter 2
URL Chapter 3
Critiqued by Ghostcat

 

 

 

Hello, dear Patrons!

I’ve decided to pick a little something from my stock of FNAF fics, and this one is a little different from what we usually get. It’s a “Q & A” fic, where the author uses the characters to answer questions – some times posed by the audience and sometimes chosen at random from wherever the author finds them. These type of fics have a number of issues, principally that they require an in-depth understanding of the characters in order to craft realistic answers. As we have seen in the Library’s archives, this is a very tricky thing for fledgling authors to do.

Let’s take a look at the summary!

Mike Schmidt and the animatronics are lured back to Freddy Fazbear’s Pizzeria, which has been rebuilt by a strange girl with a hat full of tricks. Rated M for language, gore, and raunchy content

Uh-huh. Given that a lot of fanfics seem to have been written by people who are still in the “say ‘boobs’ and giggle like mad” phase of their development, this should be interesting.

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1856: The Frozen Nightwatch – Chapter 3

  • Title: The Frozen Nightwatch
    Author: Gmagic1337
    Media: Video Game/Movie
    Topic:  Five Nights at Freddy’s/Frozen
    Genre: Fantasy/Horror
    URL: Chapter 3
    Critiqued by Ghostcat

 

 

 

 

Hello, and welcome to the third (and so far last) chapter!

At the end of the last chapter – which was full of the dry recitation of the deaths of many, many citizens of Arendelle as well as a gross cold and soggy chocolate pancake/whole strawberry/whipped non-dairy product sandwich – Anna read Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza ad in the newspaper and immediately decided that it was the perfect job for her despite the opposite being true.

On to the fic!

9:45 AM

Oh, look; a time stamp. :eye-twitch: Awesome. Just what the fic needed.

 

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1851: The Frozen Nightwatch – Chapter 2

 

Title: The Frozen Nightwatch
Author: Gmagic1337
Media: Video Game/Movie
Topic:  Five Nights at Freddy’s/Frozen
Genre: Fantasy/Horror
URL: Chapter 2
Critiqued by Ghostcat

 

 

 

 

Hello, and welcome back to another chapter of potential trollfic! In the last chapter we were presented with the implausible scenario of the entire country of Arendelle moving to Portland, Oregon followed by an exceptionally dull play-by-play of some of the gameplay mechanics.

Never have I prayed so fervently for a jumpscare.

On to the fic!

# -Back at the sisters’ house, Saturday, March 17, 1983- #
-7:21 AM-

Yay, another time-stamp. And it’s one that reminds me of a gritty crime drama, which is going to put a weird cast on things.

Anna lay in her bed, snuggled up in her bed sheets with her red hair all messed up.

A nice warm bed with a built-in snuggle buddy sounds pretty damn good.

She then woke to a familiar smell.

This is why you shouldn’t have spicy foods before bed.

‘Chocolate’.

Yeah, right; I’m sure it was ‘chocolate’ that she was smelling.

She blinked open her sleepy eyes, and smelled the scent of chocolate getting heavier.

Someone open a window before she melts the wallpaper!

She sat up in her bed and rubbed her eyes with her right hand as to get the bits of sleep out. She was now wide awake.

Anna wakes up a lot faster than I do, and I usually have several hungry cats wanting my attention to help me out.

‘Is Elsa cooking something?’ she thought to herself.

Or the house could be made out of chocolate and is also on fire. But your hypothesis is good, too.

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1845: The Frozen Nightwatch – Chapter 1

 

Title: The Frozen Nightwatch
Author: Gmagic1337
Media: Video Game/Movie
Topic:  Five Nights at Freddy’s/Frozen
Genre: Fantasy/Horror
URL: Chapter 1
Critiqued by Ghostcat

 

 

 

 

Hello, dear Patrons, and welcome to another fic! And while the title might make you think that this is a Game of Thrones/Song of Ice and Fire fic, it isn’t – this is another Frozen/Five Nights at Freddy’s crossover, because that’s something that the world needs more of. There’s a very good chance that this could be a trollfic – there’s nothing on the author’s bio and the only fic to their name is this one, both good indications of a trollfic – but it’s not going to stop me. Now, let’s take a look at the summary.

After Arendelle is basically left to rot after a ‘depression’, everyone, including Anna and Elsa flee and move to Portland, Oregon. Here, they try to find jobs for themselves to try to get their lives back from poverty. Elsa is hired as a school teacher, while Anna works as a nightwatch at Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza and discovers it’s terrifying truth at night!

I’m going to have a very hard time not picturing Anna as one of the brothers of the Night’s Watch.

So apparently, the entire population of a small European country moved en masse to a single US city and they are all going to get jobs even though a massive influx of people would be a terrible drain on the local economy and probably make it harder to find a job. And Anna and Elsa, who have no marketable skills beyond being royalty, are going to be two of the lucky few to find work.

Right.

It was just after the winter of 1983.

So … It was spring of 1984?

Four years after the gruesome incident at a local kids pizzeria in the city of Portland, Oregon.

Do you mean the infamous Bite of ’87? Because that would be four years in the future.

Since then, the pizzeria had received negative impressions from some people, including the parents of children.

Having one of your animatronics remove a child’s frontal lobe will do that for you.

What made the pizzeria so popular before was its main animatronic character, Freddy Fazbear. Though of course, that’s what the restaurant’s theme was.

Just him, all the others can go to hell.

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1829: Elsa’s Night at Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza – Chapters 1-5

Title: Elsa’s Night at Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza
Author: Christopher Spielberg
Media: Video Game/Movie
Topic: Five Nights at Freddy’s/Frozen
Genre: Humor/Horror
URL: Chapter 1
URL: Chapter 2
URL:  Chapter 3
URL: Chapter 4
URL: Chapter 5
Critiqued by Ghostcat

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hello, dear Patrons, and welcome to another fic. This one is from my pile of short and strange crossovers; more specifically it is a crossover between Five Nights at Freddy’s and Frozen, because …. I don’t really know why anyone would cross those two canons. I picked this one from the half-dozen or so that were in that particular section, so let’s take a look at the summary to see what attracted my attention.

When a letter has mailed to Elsa in Arendelle, there is a job where she can get 150 a night. But when she gets there, she senses that something isn’t right with the pizzeria…

Right away I can spot some questionable grammar and a shaky premise, as well as the use of numerals in the narration. I assume this is going to be an AU fic, which is common in crossovers with very disparate canons, because why would a queen take a job in a pizzeria? There’s also a very high number of chapters in relation to the fic’s word count – a little over two thousand words spread over five chapters – and while there is no set chapter length this sort of disparity is rarely a good sign.

Let’s look at the fic!

Based on SMG4’s Mario/FNAF crossover.

This actually took me a bit of digging; I thought at first that this was another fanfic based off of a fanfic, but there is no fanfic author by that name on any of the main sites. Turns out that SMG4 is a channel on YouTube that does mostly mash-up videos, so this is a fanfic based on a YouTube video.

That’s promising.

(without bad words and inappropriate scenes; has alternative scenes with Frozen)

So not only is it a fanfic based on a YouTube video, but the author took out the “inappropriate” bits and bad language and added in a dash of Frozen instead. I don’t see how this could possibly go wrong.

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1765: The New Security Guard – Chapter 2

 

Title: The New Security Guard
Author: The Lazy Darklord
Media: Video Game
Topic: Five Nights at Freddy’s
Genre: Hurt/Comfort
URL Chapter 2
Critiqued by Ghostcat

 

 

 

Welcome back, dear Patrons, to another chapter! When last we met, the audience was introduced to college freshman and extremely late bloomer Gabe/Michael via a pair of rambling and disjointed flashbacks that raised more questions than they answered.

On to the fic! Which starts with another all-bold Author’s Note that contains almost no punctuation. Yay.

Hello everybody and welcome back to the Fnaf fanfic,

Which so far has had very little FNAF in it.

some of you might be wondering hey dark why is it that you sometimes promise to finish a story and then you just disappear from the face of the earth for a few months,

No, I can honestly say I wasn’t wondering that at all. At the risk of resurrecting one of our favorite dead horses, you aren’t on a schedule. Post (or don’t post) whenever you feel like it. Your only deadline is self-imposed.

im not going to make excuses i honestly was at point were i was almost entirely done with fanfiction mainly because i did alot of work into my stories and then too rewrite them was an honest pain in my ass

Welcome to writing, honey – it’s two percent pure pleasure and ninety-eight percent soul-shredding grunt work that no one will ever see. And don’t even get me started on editing; it’s much easier to edit someone else’s work because you aren’t emotionally invested in it, but trying to edit your own writing is like having your fingers caught in a bear trap and trying to decide which one to gnaw off first.

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