2424: Mass Murder Effect: The First War Crime (Was Committed By The Protagonists) — Chapter 5 Part 2

Title: Mass Effect: The First War
Author: ProfFartBurger
Media: Video Game
Topic: Mass Effect
Genre: Adventure/Sci-Fi
URL: Chapter 5
Critiqued by AdmiralSakai

Hello hello all you patrons, and welcome back to Mass Effect: The First War, which up until now I was worried was actually a 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea ‘fic.

Previously, the quarians and humans had a bunch of ethnic tensions going on as the quarians colonized Eden. Then a fleet of four hundred batarian ships showed up, intent on colonizing what they thought was an uninhabited system (they call it ‘Porland’ instead of ‘Eden’ for reasons I cannot begin to fathom), no doubt loaded to the brim with mustache wax, large hams, and Campbell’s Rich & Chunky.

The batarians told the quarians running the joint defense fleet to clear off or they would tell the Council their location, and then the quarians told the batarians “don’t give our location to the people who want to arrest us for our indiscriminate murders, because if you do we’ll indiscriminately murder you as well! We’re such great people!”

Surprisingly, the batarians decided this qualified as a threat and went ahead and preemptively attacked the quarians.

first_war_bb_6.png

Read the rest of this entry »