Hello, and welcome back to “Athame’s Light,” by Legionary Prime! I’m your host, SC, joined by Spectre Myrai, and last time, Myrai’s ship exploded, which sucked, because now I have to bribe Bifocals to build her a new one – which DOES NOT run the risk of killing her horrifically, so that’s extra bribery right there – but meanwhile, we got to read the thrilling adventures of the Asari meeting pre-uplift humanity, fighting Batarians, and the birth of Asari!Shep, who is the direct result of an unholy union between Councilor Tevos and Dad!Shep. There’s also Cousin!Shep, who’s the daughter of Hannah!Shep, and apparently she’ll have a somewhat leading role in this fic alongside Asari!Shep, so that’s just swell. Then the author got bored of actually showing things and instead resorted to a timeline crawl up to the point of the Eden Prime mission.
Spectre Myrai: Can I interrupt you for a minute, and say that it worries me that you have to bribe your resident engineer to not do a shitty job?
Spectre Myrai: Why’re you laughing?
Bifocals isn’t an engineer.
Spectre Myrai: Then, what is she?
Very probably the reason that the Reapers exist.
Spectre Myrai: …You know what, I’ll just mail order a new ship from some sleazy Volus, at least all they demand are credits.