2326: Legend of Zelda: The True Force – Chapter Nineteen, Part One

Title: Legend of Zelda: The True Force
Author:  Hikari no Vikki
Media: Video Game / Movie
Topic: Legend of Zelda / Star Wars
Genre: Adventure / Fantasy
URL: Legend of Zelda: The True Force
Critiqued by TacoMagic and Retired Darth Lord Crunchy

Whew, we’re in for it now, Patrons.  We have arrived at chapter nineteen.  Chapter nineteen is the second longest chapter in this fic, and the longest of the chapters in the second block.  It’s a fifteen-thousand-word monster of padding and dungeon regurgitation and we’re going in hard!  And, as a spoiler to everyone, one of the reasons this chapter is so fucking long is because of Dark Link.  Yup, that obnoxious-yet-fun mini-boss fight will be used to pad the living snot out of this thing.  Anyone who’s surprised should go back and read a few of the other Legend of Zelda fanfics we’ve featured here.  Dark Link is basically padding incarnate in any fic he shows up in, and often enough with a giant handlebar mustache to boot.  Anyway, Crunchy, hit us with that recap!

“Dungeon crawling and a tentacle beast.”

That was pithy.

“And no information of value was lost.”

As it’s a new chapter, let’s check out Vikki’s latest cringe-inducing disclaimer and author’s note!

Disclaimer: I… have a shirt. That’s about it. I own nothing else.

*Taco and Crunchy cringe*

Dude, the pathos is too thick.

Okay, so after this chapter I’m gonna disappear for a little bit and then maybe I’ll try to work on getting to and through the Shadow Temple at some point.

“Unfortunately we are far enough into the future to know she makes good on that promise.”

But things also need to start moving in regards to Link and Ashei, and other character development… bleh.

I mean, any character development at all would be nice.  Also, for the record, character development is characters changing and growing due to the circumstances they are exposed to.  Reacting with absolute consistently to all stimulus is not character development.  For example, Link and Ashei’s “OMG WE TOUCHED!” *BLUSH BLUSH* relationship is not one that is being developed so much as it is has been flopped in there because high school anime.

“Having the characters be complex and dynamic seems to be a bit of a tall order for this fic.  I would be satisfied if the characters could simply be relevant to the plot.”

Yeah, baby steps here, Vikki.  Work on actually remembering you have more than two characters first, then try to make them interesting.

Too much to think about right now.

Precisely why your fic sucks so hard:  Can’t be bothered to think about the plot before you actually sit down to write it.

“One of the multitude of reasons, at least.”

Just scroll down and enjoy. Bon appetit!

“I must confess my confusion.  Are we supposed to read this, or gnaw on it?”

In all fairness, it would probably serve better as a chew toy than a fic.

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