1773: Slender and Reader: Lost in the Woods : Chapter 1

 

Title: Slender and Reader: Lost in the Woods
Author: Pockypokemongirl
Media: Video Game/Creepypasta
Topic: Slender: The Eight Pages
Genre: Romance/Horror
URL: Chapter 1
Critiqued by Ghostcat

 

 

 

Hello, dear Patrons!

I’m here with a little fic from the Slender: The Eight Pages section of ff.net – and it’s a Reader fic! Because you know how “fun” those fics are. Lucky for you fabulous Patrons, I decided against riffing any of the Slender Man hardcore erotica (which is apparently called “Slendtai”) Reader fics.

Yes, that is really a thing. No, you should not Google it.

Anyway, lets take a look at the summary for this particular fic;

Reader x Slenderman Your mom and you were in Germany for a trip but things turn into a supernatural encounter because of an accident. Hey since due to the fans I wrote more for you guys enjoy! Tweaked the second chap for yah.

While I do enjoy travelling with my mother, I doubt we would take a trip to Germany by ourselves – primarily because neither one of us knows any German, which would probably hamper our enjoyment.

Hello. Spring break is here so I’ll be posting here and there, so my main thing now is I should have written a Slenderman thing long ago this might be a story hope you like.

Well, that was pointless – but at least it was short. Let’s hope the trend continues!

Sound of rain reaches your ears not only that your heart softly beats along to the music.

:blinks:

Except for when I was going through my angsty teen phase, I don’t remember ever being this purple.

Your eyes looked around the country Germany.

Like, the whole thing? Damn, all those carrots I’ve been eating must be working.

Your mom had booked a flight to Germany and being a naturalist she wanted to go to the Black Forest.

My mother isn’t a naturalist, she’s a retired secretary who sells things on eBay to supplement her income. And what exactly is she studying, those weird giant earthworms? There’s not really a lot of unique species in the area.

Your eyes catch on to the woods.

:screams and falls to the floor, clutching her eyes:

—ONE BRIEF RESPAWN LATER—

:walks into Riffing Chamber dressed as a member of the Lollipop Guild just as Housekeeping is removing the last bloodstains from the chair:

Sweet mercy, and I thought getting a lash in my eye hurt.

The music in the background seems to fade.

What music? There is no mention of music.Was I even listening to music, or do I have some sort of soundtrack that accompanies my entire existence?

Its dark and pulling these woods, unlike any other wood you been to.

I dunno; I’ve been to both the Redwood National Forest and Yosemite and they were pretty stunning.

Darkness hangs over the world.

That’s a overly fancy way of saying it’s night time.

Bits of snow catches your eye.

GAHHH!!!

:wipes face with towel:

Damn, that stings. At least it wasn’t another forest, though.

Purity then your eye catches a figure his form tall and dressed nicely.

:screams and falls to the floor again, once more clutching her eyes:

—ONE ADDITIONAL RESPAWN LATER—

:walks into Riffing Chamber dressed as a member of the Lullaby League just as Housekeeping replaces the riffing console:

:THWACK!:

STOP PUTTING THINGS IN MY EYES!

I don’t even know what the hell that sentence even means.

The stopped for a bit then seeing his odd face. His head tilted to the side and his questionable pose became more visible. You waved a greeting. The figure stiffened, of course he turned away slightly.

And now there’s a whole bunch of sentences that I don’t understand? What even is this grammar doing?

” (Name), Sweetheart what are you doing? Who are you waving to?” You turned to your mom.

Your guess is as good as mine, Mama.

“There is a man..” Your voice faded away. The man was gone. Where did he go?

Well, of course I can’t see him anymore – I’m not facing that direction now because I turned around to talk to my mother.

“Hon… Theres no man. Are you alright?” She asks her arm drapped over the seat. Those eyes closely watches yours. Again you sighed and answered, “I’m fine…”

I really hope we’re in a plane or on a bus, because if Mama is driving then we are in a lot of trouble.

The leather sounded as your mom turned to the front and continues to drive.

We are so going to crash.

You could not help but to watch the woods behind you. That man watches you…again. Fear shivers down your spine.

Unless Mama is the is the slowest driver ever, I’m not going to be able to see this Mysterious Figure for very long so I doubt there’s going to be much fear-shivering going on.

You didn’t know he made you his prey or maybe… something else.

I’m trying very hard not to speculate on what that “something else” might be.

There’s a line-break for some reason, and then the fic continues.

Cars sounded by your car drives by. Your mom hummed a happy tune while you felt very tired after being in a plane and now riding a car.

That does not sound like my mother; she’s a cranky traveler.

“Mom?” You yawn.

“Yes-” Crash. Everything spinning.

See?!? This is what happens when you don’t pay attention when you’re driving.

Your stomach churned like butter.

Ewww.

Coming to a final stop after hearing your mom say,”Are you alright?!”

I think we were just in a car accident, so probably not.

“I think so,” you paused, “What about you?” your body ached while your mom grunted. What did we crash into? Your mind groogily tried to remember. Nothing… Your mother’s voice boomed. It sounded afriad.

Of course I didn’t see what we hit, I was staring off into the woods trying to see the Mysterious Figure.

“Get to the trees… quick.” You realize why she sounded so panicked. Gas.

“No!”

“Do it now!”

“I won’t-“

Is there anything on fire? Then the probability of there being a fire is low since this was apparently a head-on collision. It’s still a good idea to move away from the wreckage, but it’s probably not going to burst into flames or explode into a massive movie-esque fireball.

“(Name), please. Live on for me and be happy. Now go!..” Her eyes showed fear, but you are a big concern to her. Your legs had a mind of their own. They carried you deep into the forest. Tears streamed down your face.

What the hell? Why isn’t she getting off her lazy ass and getting out of the car? I get that this is supposed to be some big dramatic/tragic event, but there’s nothing keeping her in the car.

Boom.

Image result for small firework

Well, that was a disappointing explosion.

Just like the explosion your heart broke then founding yourself on the ground. Crying.

Good to know I’m taking time out of my grieving to angst properly.

You won’t move at all, and only moving to curl into a ball.

Did I move or didn’t I? Which is it?

Mom… She was the only thing you had.

No, not really. I would be sad if my mother died, but I have a lot of family, friends, and cats.

Your father went missing in the army and your brother died at a very young age.

My father is still alive, has never been in the service (although his father was at Normandy on D-Day, one uncle was an Army Ranger before joining the FBI and another served in Vietnam, and my nephew is currently serving active duty in the Army) and I’ve never had a brother.

Your grandparents didn’t approve of your mother marring your father.

No, my maternal grandparents really liked my father.

You’re alone.

:moves cat off keyboard:

Sometimes I wish that were so.

You cried to sleep.

Only after binge-watching really sad stuff on Netflix.

The crickets chirped in your ears while a strange sound echoed in the air.

I live in a fairly rural area of the South; between the katydids and the crickets, in the summer the noise outside is practically deafening.

zzzz.

I must be snoring, which is actually a thing that I do – although it’s been described as more of a snorting/grunting sound than the stereotypical “zzzz” noise.

 

You sat up quickly and turned around.

Did I remember to do the Hokey-Pokey first?

A scream sounding in the air as well as gun shots.

GUNSHOTS?!? The hell?

You panicked.

Yeah, no shit! That’s what happens when SOMEONE SHOOTS AT ME!

Not only your mother died but now the police looking around for you are being brutally murdered.

Ummm … Why are the police brutally murdering me? I don’t think they are doing a very good job – I’m, y’know, not dead.

You ran. Crunching of your footsteps made you paranoid.

Sorry. :puts bag of chips to the side: Respawning makes me peckish.

No! No! Your mothers voice rung in your head live on. Some tears streamed down your eyes you had to run though.

—YET ANOTHER RESPAWN LATER—

:walks into Riffing Chamber dressed as Glenda The Good Witch while Housekeeping bleaches the floor:

I ran through my own frickin’ eyes. HOW DO YOU RUN THROUGH YOUR OWN EYES!?!

zzzt.

:looks around: Seriously, what is that? Is there a bug zapper around here somewhere?

It was growing closer. You yelped as you tripped now toppling down the hillside. Your body was smacked and bruised after coming to a stop.

Where did a hill come from? I thought we were driving through a forest.

“Damn… That hurt…” Your arm throbbed.

To be fair, part of those injuries are probably from the car wreck I was just in.

“Zst” it was right behind you.

:waves hand around: Frickin’ skeeters, ruining my moping time!

You froze and felt something wrapped your waist. Zsst. It sounded again. You peered over your shoulder.

Did I forget to take off my seatbelt and it’s trying to pull me back into the car?

You tried screaming but it didn’t even escape your lips. A tentacle lied over it.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

It was that man you saw.

Y’know, that guy! The one with the thing.

He knelt down at your level.

Hey now! I’m short but I’m not that short.

Zst. He sounded but he had no mouth. It perplexed you.

That’s not all that I find perplexing. I’d be worried that I got a concussion in the accident, but this wonkiness started before that point.

How does he even eat? Or drink? How can he even live?

Is this the real life, or just fantasy? Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality. Open your eyes, look up to the sky and see… :continues singing for another six minutes:

:ninja appears and joins in with epic guitar solos:

Those lessons are really paying off, Shinobi-san!

If he had eyes you see him gazing intently at you.

Nandatte? The hell does that even mean?

Why didn’t he want to kill you?

Why do I assume anyone wants to kill me? I’m not that annoying.

He wanted to kill the others, but not you. Why?

Why did he want to kill these “others” that I assume were the cops who murdered me? I have no idea, but he must be some sort of unhinged psychopath if he just goes around murdering random people. And is that why there was all that gunfire a minute ago?

There are so many questions but couldn’t ask because of one being in fear the other frustration and curiosity.

Also, I’m apparently being gagged with a tentacle.

His head gets closer to yours. ZST! You cringed slightly.

Damn static discharge. He must be wearing wool.

It backed off and seem to watch you.

Does it have eyes to watch me with? I assume this is the standard-issue faceless Slender Man, but the narration hasn’t made it very clear.

The other tentacles opened like a flower.

Ewww! Wait, other tentacles? There are other tentacles? And why must they flower?

Looking harder at the white faced man, you see his cheek bones and squared jaw also seeing his arms unusually long as well as his legs.

I am very not good at describing things.

Not to mention his boney claw fingers now touched your chin.

Then why am I mentioning them? Also;

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

They curved and glide over your cheek.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

You jumped feeling the tentacles glide around. Zst.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

And what the hell keeps making that weird noise? Is it supposed to be him?

He got you to look at him. Now you were curious of his face.

I’m almost positive I was already looking at him and was curious about his face (or lack thereof.)

Your fingers dirtied by the dirt and begun to think.

:alarms blare:

Great, just great. Multiple eye-induced respawns in the same chapter and now the DRD.

:picks up Magic Admin Wand:

This seems appropriate given my current outfit. Be right back, Patrons; I’ve got to go bippity-boppity-boo some folks.

—THE LIBRARY IS EXPERIENCING TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES—

—PLEASE STAND BY—

:walks back to the deck and hands Shinobi-san a large, faintly squeaking bucket:

Hold this for me, would you? Don’t let any of them jump out!

:sits back down:

Now, where was I? Oh, right; my fingers are thinking.

You cleaned them off while that his hand froze on your face.

Probably because the terrible tentacle-monster isn’t used to being ignored in favor of rudimentary personal hygiene.

You blushed slightly as it was now cupping your cheek.

I thought he was already doing that?

:distant explosion:

What explosion?

He watched you clean your hand then reaching to his face. He gave a soft hiss.

I don’t blame him; I wouldn’t want to be touched with that nasty hand either.

He relaxed when you stroke the pure white face.

Leaving big streaks of dirt across it; I probably tried to write my initials while I was at it.

You freaked, when he places you in his lap. A gulp. He hears you.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

Hell yes I’m going to freak out! And it’s not going to be any little gulp – I kick, I scream, I wail like the souls of the damned being dragged into Hell. And that’s just when my wi-fi goes down.

The slender like man assures your safe by striking your face with a tentacle.

:blinks:

I don’t think he understands the concept of ‘safe’, like, at all.

It was soft like peach fuzz.

My face is fuzzy? Did I forget to shave this morning?

The smell of iron rose to your nose. Blood you grew scared.

Fragments. Disjointed sentences. Sense not made.

What made you jump again was his arms wrapping your waist.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

You blushed harder and grew a little worried. Zst.

Dude, I am way beyond worried.

:less distant explosion:

That wasn’t an explosion.

His head hesitantly lean on your shoulder. Your heart beats faster.

I better not be doing any of that “doki-doki” shit.

Sounds of cracking went off beside you. You turned to see him with a mouth.

…Is he just holding some mouth he ripped off one of my murderers?

Dagger like teeth erupted from his mouth.

Did he accidentally use Bart’s toothpaste? Koori-chan had it specially made for him, so it can produce an … interesting reaction when anyone from a non-shark species uses it.

The white man’s face touches yours. The white cheek turned pink.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

: slightly less distant explosion:

I must have the hiccups or something.

A tongue black and forked slithered out.

Why is there a tongue in his frickin’ cheek!?!

Here Is were it got strange.

:spits coffee all over desk:

What the hell do you mean here it gets strange?!? My mother just exploded in a fireball, I was murdered by policemen, and now I’m cuddling with a tentacle monster! What part of that isn’t strange?

Well, I mean for anywhere that isn’t the Library.

His lips brushed yours then took hold.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

He better not rip my lips off to add to his collection. I don’t care who he is, I will shank him in the kidneys.

You stiffened then your knuckles clenched.

:crosses fingers:

Please let me punch him; please, please let me punch him!

Oddly enough he stopped then tried it differently by holding your chin up.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

This kiss was sweet and oddly gentle.

And completely inappropriate as my mother just exploded and I’ve been shot to death.

Your face grew red even more.

:far less distant explosion:

I need a glass of water or something, this is getting out of hand.

:Shinobi-san holds out the bucket:

Not those!

He stopped again… The man wonders why did he do that?

He’s not the only one wondering that.

He jumped when you slumped against him looking very tired.

Well, I have had a very busy day, what with being orphaned and dying and all that.

Your eyes begun to close. His own face reddens.

:much less distant explosion:

EXCUSE ME!

Breathing softly he only looks at you.

Still not entirely sure if he has eyes with which to do that.

The slenderman holds you close as he begin to walk on his tentacles toward home.

He’s going to be picking splinters out of those things for hours.

The End?

Nope, there’s another chapter! But that’s all I’m doing today.

Now, if you’ll excuse me… :takes squeaking bucket from Shinobi-san: Auntie Ghostie has a few little presents for Jiwe.

 

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83 Comments on “1773: Slender and Reader: Lost in the Woods : Chapter 1”

  1. AdmiralSakai says:

    Reader x Slenderman Your mom and you were in Germany for a trip but things turn into a supernatural encounter because of an accident. Hey since due to the fans I wrote more for you guys enjoy! Tweaked the second chap for yah.

    Great. Because the thing I absolutely want to be thinking about when reading Slenderman erotica is my mother.

  2. Tweaked the second chap for yah.

    Oooh, someone is tweaking chaps? Can I get in on this action?

  3. AdmiralSakai says:

    Your eyes looked around the country Germany.

    As opposed to the planet Germany. Or the city.

  4. AdmiralSakai says:

    “Get to the trees… quick.” You realize why she sounded so panicked. Gas.

    “No!”

    “Do it now!”

    “I won’t-“

    Is there anything on fire? Then the probability of there being a fire is low since this was apparently a head-on collision. It’s still a good idea to move away from the wreckage, but it’s probably not going to burst into flames or explode into a massive movie-esque fireball.

    “(Name), please. Live on for me and be happy. Now go!..” Her eyes showed fear, but you are a big concern to her. Your legs had a mind of their own. They carried you deep into the forest. Tears streamed down your face.

    What the hell? Why isn’t she getting off her lazy ass and getting out of the car? I get that this is supposed to be some big dramatic/tragic event, but there’s nothing keeping her in the car.

    Boom.

    Because nothing says “romance” like the death of your mother.

    • GhostCat says:

      Ahh, there’s nothing like a nice moonlit stroll through a foreboding forest followed by a candlelit dinner and relaxing on a bearskin rug in front of the smoldering remains of your sole remaining parent.

      • CrunchyRaptor says:

        *Wipes a tear from his eye*

        I apologize; I am just so overcome by joyful memories all of a sudden.

  5. AdmiralSakai says:

    I ran through my own frickin’ eyes. HOW DO YOU RUN THROUGH YOUR OWN EYES!?!

    Well, this is another ‘fic featuring [DATA EXPUNGED], terror from beyond the dimensions.

  6. AdmiralSakai says:

    You tried screaming but it didn’t even escape your lips. A tentacle lied over it.

    [DATA EXPUNGED]: “Aaah!”

    Tentacle: “HILLARY CLINTON’S RUNNING A PEDOPHILE RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!!!”

  7. AdmiralSakai says:

    He sounded but he had no mouth.

    And pray tell, what exactly does a creature that has no mouth sound like?

    • GhostCat says:

      One of the great unanswered questions of Slender Man fanfics. There are so many that feature him either talking or making some kind of noise; it almost makes you wonder if the fic authors even care.

  8. AdmiralSakai says:

    His head gets closer to yours. ZST! You cringed slightly.

    [DATA EXPUNGED] has an instinctive fear of even the mention of a Japanese mixed martial arts organization? I would never have guessed.

  9. Jon Arbuckle says:

    “What the hell? Why isn’t she getting off her lazy ass and getting out of the car? I get that this is supposed to be some big dramatic/tragic event, but there’s nothing keeping her in the car.”

    Are you sure this is my mother and not Jonathan Kent?

  10. BatJamags says:

    Slender and Reader: Lost in the Woods

    Well, shit. Looks like it’s about time that…

    WHIRLYBAT VON FLUBBERTYBUBBLE RIDES AGAIN!

  11. BatJamags says:

    Reader x Slenderman Your mom and you were in Germany for a trip but things turn into a supernatural encounter because of an accident. Hey since due to the fans I wrote more for you guys enjoy! Tweaked the second chap for yah.

    Not to bad of a trip for Whirlybat von Flubbertybubble. The Country of Flubbertybubble actually borders Germany except when it doesn’t.

  12. BatJamags says:

    Your eyes looked around the country Germany.

    Holy crap, Whirlybat von Flubbertybubble! Your eyes flew out of their sockets and looked around all of Germany!

    Whirlybat von Flubbertybubble: Help.

  13. BatJamags says:

    Your mom had booked a flight to Germany and being a naturalist she wanted to go to the Black Forest.

    “Black Forest” sounds so scary, like it’s some evil corrupted forest with monsters in it, but I looked up some pictures, and it’s actually a pretty green forest.

  14. BatJamags says:

    ” Whirlybat von Flubbertybubble, Sweetheart what are you doing? Who are you waving to?” You turned to your mom.

    Whirlybat von Flubbertybubble: Hey, Mama von Flubbertybubble! There’s another incomprehensible eldritch being here! I was just saying hi!

  15. BatJamags says:

    “Whirlybat von Flubbertybubble, please. Live on for me and be happy. Now go!..” Her eyes showed fear, but you are a big concern to her. Your legs had a mind of their own. They carried you deep into the forest. Tears streamed down your face.

    Boom.

    Whirlybat von Flubbertybubble: Noooooooowait, what the hell is going on? I’m confused.

  16. BatJamags says:

    Your father went missing in the army and your brother died at a very young age.

    Whirlybat von Flubbertybubble: No, I’m pretty sure Papa von Flubbertybubble showed up in one of the other reader fics to be a jerk about a romance or something. And Bro von Flubbertybubble just spontaneously popped into existence. As a corpse. What a start!

  17. BatJamags says:

    Your grandparents didn’t approve of your mother marring your father.

    Whirlybat von Flubbertybubble: Why not? Darth Marr is cool!

    • SC says:

      And then they fucking kill him after like five minutes of awesome in Knights of the Fallen Empire.

      • BatJamags says:

        Finally getting back into SWTOR (I’ve been trying to stem the tide of incessant references to whatever I happen to be into at the moment, but here I couldn’t resist), and there are so many things pissing me off about the Zakuul arc. Not the least of which being that they killed Darth Marr.

      • SC says:

        I can barely even play now because the damn cinematics are too much for my poor laptop to handle.

        I’m still stuck on chapter seven of Knights of the Fallen Empire. I’m NEVER gonna get to Eternal Throne at this rate.

  18. BatJamags says:

    Did I remember to do the Hokey-Pokey first?

    That’s what it’s all about.

  19. BatJamags says:

    I ran through my own frickin’ eyes. HOW DO YOU RUN THROUGH YOUR OWN EYES!?!

    Whirlybat von Flubbertybubble: It takes a lot of practice.

  20. BatJamags says:

    I thought he was already doing that?

    :distant explosion:

    What explosion?

    *Respawns dressed as the Cowardly Lion*

    Rocket Glove tests are going worse than expected.

  21. BatJamags says:

    The smell of iron rose to your nose.

    Iron Rose? The hell? Is that like Crescent Rose?

    Oh, “rose” is a verb. Got it.

    • SC says:

      Though I’m sure someone’s made a RWBY OC with a weapon called Iron Rose.

      • agigabyte says:

        Cain: There’s one with a double edged double bladed dual sword shotgun sniper scythe, so I’m of the belief that anything’s possible with RWBY OCs.

      • agigabyte says:

        Cain: Apologies, I got the description wrong. It’s “duel double edged duel bladed sword sniper shotgun scythe.”

        And it’s called Night’s Fury.

        *DuFresne appears*

        DuFresne: Okay, what seems to be the problem?

        Cain: A dual double edged, double bladed sword, which is also a sniper rifle-shotgun-scythe.

        DuFresne: Ain’t touching that with a hundred-foot pole.

      • SC says:

        Ow, my suspension of disbelief.

  22. BatJamags says:

    :less distant explosion:

    That wasn’t an explosion.

    Intercom: Containment Teams Five, Six, Seven, and Eight please report to sublevel 507 in full ragebuster gear. You are hearby forbidden to ask what happened to Containment Teams One, Two, Three, and Four.

  23. BatJamags says:

    : slightly less distant explosion:

    I must have the hiccups or something.

    Intercom: Containment Teams nine, ten, eleven, and twelve, please report to Intercom Center in full ragebuster gear. Darkwraith Gore Cleanup Crew 53, report here in fifteen min-*hurk*

    Intercom: FUCKING BLUSHING BULLSHIT! WHY?! WHERE DID THIS COME FROM?! WHY IS IT A THING?!

  24. BatJamags says:

    :far less distant explosion:

    I need a glass of water or something, this is getting out of hand.

    GoodJamags: Look, just put the Superlaser down, and nobody gets hurt. Except for those twelve teams of Security Darkwraiths and the gore cleanup crew and the nameless intercom announcer and just about everybody else between you and here. But other than them, nobody gets hurt.

  25. BatJamags says:

    :much less distant explosion:

    EXCUSE ME!

    GoodJamags: *Weakly* He didn’t put the superlaser down…

  26. SC says:

    While I do enjoy travelling with my mother, I doubt we would take a trip to Germany by ourselves – primarily because neither one of us knows any German, which would probably hamper our enjoyment

    *Bifocals sits quietly under a sign advertising tour guides*

    • agigabyte says:

      *Geronimo sidles- (Well, no, not sidles; she’s never timid or furtive, let alone unobtrusive. Shifts? Slides? I’ll go with slides. Where was I? Ah, yes. -Monitor)

      *Geronimo slides up to Bifocals*

      Geronimo: So, how many weapons does that sign turn into?

  27. SC says:

    Your eyes catch on to the woods.

    Specs: Hey guys, what’s going on in-

    *A piece of wood suddenly and brutally rips Specs’ eyes out, and he collapses to the floor, bleeding profusely from his eye sockets; a short flash of light and a pop later, Specs is revived*

    Specs: Can someone tell Groot to cool his shit?

  28. SC says:

    I dunno; I’ve been to both the Redwood National Forest and Yosemite and they were pretty stunning

    *Smugly waves Californian flag*

    • GhostCat says:

      You also have the Pacific Coast Highway, which is beautiful, but I haven’t been down the entire thing just a short little section of it near San Francisco.

      • SC says:

        We also have the Golden Gate Bridge.

        …Which may or may not be getting ready to collapse due to all the rust that nobody bothered to deal with for several decades.

        • GhostCat says:

          They dealt with it by adding more paint, which is the same way my grandfather dealt with cleaning furniture – you don’t have to do anything to it if it’s been freshly painted. (This is why most of the furniture from the farm had multiple layers of paint (all specked with dust, dead bugs, dirt, etc. that were encased like little filthy pearls) on it.)

      • SC says:

        Yeah, but now that it’s out that the bridge is rusting, nobody even wants to slap more paint on it anymore, so there’s this big ugly blotch on the bridge.

      • BatJamags says:

        You also have the Pacific Coast Highway,

        Most of it, anyway.

      • SC says:

        Straight to the bottom of the fucking ocean, but otherwise it’s still there.

  29. SC says:

    Mom… She was the only thing you had

    Specs: Psh, well this can’t be a story about me, then. My mom and dad were taken by the plague.

    That’s… that’s not how reader stories work, dude. They’re not about ACTUAL you.

    Specs: They’re not?

    • BatJamags says:

      Except when they are, except even then they usually end up making some assumptions. Which is why most of Whirlybat von Flubbertybubble’s traits are so… flexible.

  30. SC says:

    Your father went missing in the army

    Shades: My dad did go missing in the army, yes, but that was him getting kidnapped by aliens prior to him being a paranormal cop and knowing how to deal with that. Poor man got the probe, never could sit down again.

  31. Delta XIII says:

    Topic: Slender: The Eight Pages
    Genre: Romance/Horror

    Slendpai 2: Electric Boogaloo.

  32. Delta XIII says:

    Reader x Slenderman

    • Delta XIII says:

      Your mom and you were in Germany for a trip but things turn into a supernatural encounter because of an accident.

      False: I have never left New Zealand. Hell, I’ve never left the North Island.

      • SC says:

        You are 100% undiluted Kiwi.

        • GhostCat says:

          He’s got the fancy accent and everything.

        • Delta XIII says:

          I’m actually a pretty bad Kiwi: I don’t watch Shortland Street, I have no interest in Lord of the Rings, and I don’t know the first thing about rugby.
          I do eat a fair bit of Marmite, though.

        • GhostCat says:

          I’d make a terrible Kiwi; I have no idea what Shortland Street is, know next to nothing about rugby, and I’ve never tried marmite.

        • Delta XIII says:

          Shortland Street is a medical drama; think something like E.R. or Grey’s Anatomy.
          It also has the uncanny ability to have major newsworthy events written into episodes which then occur in real life within days of the episode airing.
          Marmite is something of an acquired taste, but it’s actually quite good, especially with on toast with cheese.

      • SC says:

        Apparently, Marmite is a by-product of beer production, so could we technically call it getting drunk if you eat too much?

      • SC says:

        Boiled peanuts actually doesn’t sound that bad, to be honest.

        • GhostCat says:

          They’re raw green peanuts boiled in salt water; they taste totally different from roasted peanuts, mostly salty but with a bit of sweet, and have a different texture that’s kind of like edamame. They get soft but not all mushy so they are still a bit firm. The inside of the shell goes all slimy and you can just crack the shells open and suck the peanuts and juice out like they’re oysters. My brother-in-law, who is from Michigan, says they are kind of like olives, but he’s a big frickin’ liar because olives are horrible abominations.

      • SC says:

        Boiled peanuts sound cool.

        Olives can go die.

        Your brother in law is a fool.

        • GhostCat says:

          He once tricked me into believing he had a glass eye; he had eye surgery when he was little and it left a very faint scar on his eye, when he was dating my sister back in high school he showed it to me and told me it was the seam of his glass eye. I believed him for years, because who lies to a little kid about having a glass eye?

  33. Delta XIII says:

    :looks around: Seriously, what is that? Is there a bug zapper around here somewhere?

    I think it might be an attempt to mimic the static distortion that happens in the games when Slender Man gets close.
    Here’s the problem with that: in the games, you’re always looking through a video camera, and it can be assumed that Slendy’s eldritch, otherworldly nature is interfering with the electronics. I don’t know what (if any) kind of distortions would happen to a person, but I’m willing to wager that it wouldn’t be video static.

    • GhostCat says:

      Yeah, I know what it’s supposed to be, but like you said it makes no sense. Someone experiencing Slendy firsthand isn’t going to be seeing or hearing static.

    • AdmiralSakai says:

      I think it’s entirely possible for the creature’s psychic effects to produce something similar to video static inside the human brain (although a similar effect imprinted directly on the retina is much less likely) simply because he have no idea how its brain operates or what it is trying to send across.

      • GhostCat says:

        I wouldn’t expect “snow”-like static, because eyes don’t work like that, but something along the lines of the visual distortions and chromatic shifts that accompany the static might occur. The auditory component would probably be more along the lines of the sounds that tinnitus produces rather than a purely electronic buzz.

  34. Delta XIII says:

    *TRIPLE BAD TOUCH*

    I think I may have jumped the gun with that Linkara clip.

  35. Delta XIII says:

    :distant explosion:
    What explosion?

    [R-R-R-R-RESPAWN!!!]
    …why am I naked? And why is my right eye missing?


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