1642: Digiball Z: The Movie – Chapter FourPosted: January 3, 2017
Title: Digiball Z: The Movie
Author: Dakari-King Mykan
Topic: Digimon/Dragonball Z
URL: Chapter Four
Critiqued by AwkwardFerret
Warning: Mykan is homophobic and sexist, and it shows in this chapter. Blatantly. *hefts Carlos* Be prepared. -Lyle
I know the original Jakostu character is a male, but I just can’t stand anymore of those repulsive Homosexual acts. So I’m making this Jakotsu a girl.
Wh…holy shit, that’s quite the way to start off a chapter, gotta say! I mean, that’s Chris-Chan territory, there…
Sometime after the boys had left, a strange female figure walked up to the place where Kyokotsumon had fallen.
“Hmm, Kyokotsumon.” She said in a soothing yet evil voice. “Well, such a fate was to be expected, he was the weakest of us all.”
Strange Female Figure: “So of course, we sent him out first.”
She looked down in her hand at the tiny little object that used to be inside Kyokotsu’s head.
“But from the sound of things, this Davis Motomiya, and his sidekick Angel-Veemon, they sure are pretty handsome boys!”
Oh, good, I’m glad this is what replaced the “repulsive homosexual acts”.
She stared off into space with her cheeks all red, “I can’t wait to meet them. Daisuke, Angel-Veemon!”
Meanwhile, in the real world…
Tai brought Gonzomon home with him, as he had no where else to go. It was a good thing he lived in his own apartment.
Where he does adult things, like pay taxes and yell about useless things on Tumblr.
Davis came out of the bathroom, clean as a whistle. “Man… I finally got that slop off me.” He said.
“And you smell nice again too.” Said Yolei as she playfully waved her hand in front of her nose.
I mean, he’s complaining about the gays being “repulsive” when shit like THAT’S happening!
When Davis told everyone about Kyokotsumon, even Izzy was stumped, and he didn’t get stumped that often. “I’ve never even seen a Digimon like this before.” He said.
The only thing Izzy was able to determine was the tiny little object that escaped from Kyokotsumon when he was destroyed… it was a Seed of light!
Oh…no? What the fuck does that have to do with anything?
“A Seed of light?” asked Kari. “Hey isn’t that what Azulongmon planted in the ground to make the Destiny stones appeared?”
“Yeah, they are.” Said TK, “Wait… are you suggesting that this guy came from the Destiny stones?”
Gee, I dunno, TK, they’re made of the things that made the Destiny Stones, what do you think happened? It’s a total fucking mystery!
“That’s exactly where he came from.” Came a voice from Izzy’s computer. It was a transmission from Gennai’s floating hideout.
“Gennai…” asked Izzy. “Do you know something about this?”
Gennai: “Of course I do! It was me all along! Now the entire digital world shall tremble before my might!”
The young man on the screen just frowned, “Sadly I know everything about that Digimon, and the others.”
“Others?!” cried Yolei, “You mean there’s more? Gennai, what’s going on here?”
Gennai told the others to pay close attention. This threat was very serious as it involved the safety of the Destiny Stones.
“Pay close attention, this threat is very serious and involves the safety of the destiny stones!” Gennai told them.
Yeah, in case you haven’t noticed, Mykan has this weird thing where he sort of summarizes every couple of lines of dialogue…even though writing it out as normal dialogue would have taken up the exact same wordcount.
No they weren’t under attack by anything again, but in fact, all Seven stones had been shrouded with evil energy that was polluting the Digital world.
This was due to the fact that the band of seven had escaped from their prison, and were no roaming about in the Digital world and up to nothing but trouble.
They were “no” roaming? So…there’s no problem, then?
“Whoa, whoa, whoa, back up here?” said Davis. “Band of Seven? Who or what is the that?”
Gennai told them everything…
BUCKLE IN LADS HERE WE GO
Many years ago, when the Digital world was in it’s prime ages, there was a talk of seven extremely powerful Human-shaped Digimon, who called themselves, The Band of Seven.
They were ruthless warriors who enjoyed the sport of killing. These fighters possessed more evil in them than any Dark Digimon in the entire Digital world.
Even Myotismon? Or Cell-Myotismon?
They hunted down and killed many innocent Digimon, and the first humans who gave into these creatures. Each creature had it’s own special attacks and their own method of killing and destroying.
But I’m not going to go into any detail about it, because FUCK IT
These seven monsters were so deadly and powerful, they nearly destroyed the Digital world itself. Anyone, either Digimon or human, who stood up to these brutes ended up dead.
Soon, only Gennai and the four guardian Digimon were left, and even they could not stop the band of seven. So the four guardian Digimon decided to do the next best thing… contain them.
Well, how’s that genius plan working out for ya, pal?
As Gennai and the four guardian Digimon gained their powers back they eventually became strong enough not to destroy them Band, but conquer them.
Each band member was sealed inside a seed of light, and then Azulongmon planted the seeds in the bowels of the Digital world that became the Destiny stones.
Oh, of course! What could possibly go wrong with this genius scheme?
“You see, the Destiny Stones are not just the sources of the Digital world’s balance control… They are prisons, which have kept the band of seven at rest for all these years.”
The whole team was amazed, just when they think they know a lot about the Digital world, they discover something new.
And something that’s total bullshit, at that!
“But Gennai, why have they been released now?” asked Ken.
Gennai told them…
When Blackwargreymon destroyed the Destiny stones, Azulongmon had to plant new seeds of light to restore balance to the Digital world.
Well, how about that!
However, since the stones were destroyed, the seal was beginning to weaken, and when the Digital world was shaken up by Maylo-Myotismon’s darkness… the seal had broken completely.
Maylo-Myotismon is MaloMyotismon’s cousin who’s totally twice as evil and doesn’t wear really stupid-looking boot/sneaker things.
It was only a matter of time before the warriors had enough force to escape from the stones, as result, they have returned, and the Destiny Stones were missing their seeds of light.
Without the seeds, the stones were tainted by dark energy and were polluting the Digital world. The more the Band of Seven triumphed in their pursuit for murder, the pollution would grow and grow.
Gennai: “So maybe instead of sitting here listening to me talk about it, you fucks should go do something about it!”
“Whoa… and Kyokotsumon was only one of those dudes!” said Davis.
“Yes.” Replied Gennai, “You were able to destroy one member of the Band of seven, but count on the other six to be out there!”
“Wait a minute.” Asked Cody, “does this mean that Davis and Veemon are going to have to go out and beat every last one of these monsters?”
I love that Cody just assumes it’s gonna be Davis and Veemon’s jobs to finish the plot. He knows where he is on the pecking order, and he’s all too willing to take advantage of that.
Gennai shook his head. “I’m afraid that this is a task that eve Davis cannot do by himself.” He said.
“Tai, you and your group cannot partake in these upcoming battles. Your Digimon do not have the strength and power to fend off against the band of Seven’s might.”
Because the whole point of Digimon isn’t teamwork and friendship, it’s about one guy being so much better than everybody else around him that they might as well not even bother.
“He’s got a point.” Said Tai, “That Kyokotsumon was almost too much for us to take out alone.”
Gennai, then told Davis and his group to report to his Sky hideout at once. All six of them and their Digimon would be the ones to find and stop these monsters.
But…but…you literally just said two paragraphs ago that…AGH!
“But Gennai… we’re not ready to fight yet!” said Ken. “There’s still a lot of thing about our powers that we don’t know about.”
“Yeah…” added Cody, “And our Digimon don’t have the power Spirit Digivolve like Veemon.”
“Trust me…” said Gennai, “This promises to help you all, as well as give Davis and Veemon an extra boost of power!”
It’s the Hyperbolic Time Chamber. I mean, that’s not even a spoiler, is it?
Even Davis and Veemon looked confused. The only way they could gain anymore power was to train for a really, really long time, and time they didn’t have.
But nevertheless, they headed off to Gennai’s hideout in the sky. “Good, you’re all here.” He said when they arrived.
Each and every one of them was present and accounted for in Gennai’s sky hideout, which they had headed out for. As a result, they were now all inside the hideout, which belonged to Gennai and was in the sky, which Gennai pointed out.
He got right to the point, and lead them all to a special room behind a big steel door. Inside, was a room that seemed to stretch on and on forever.
“No way… I don’t believe this.” Said Davis. He cast look at Gennai, who nodded.
“What is it Davis?” asked TK, “What is this room?”
“This my friends…” said Davis, “Is an exact replica of the Hyperbolic Time Chamber.”
See, what’d I tell you?
“Hyperbolic what?” asked Hawkmon. “Would this be something to do with Dragon ball Z?”
Davis nodded and told them about the chamber. It was a special room where time went by much faster than it did in the outside world.
If you hooked up Einstein’s corpse to a generator, you could generate infinite power from all the rotation. And then NEWTON would start spinning, so you could DOUBLE the output! Mykan just saved the world!
Like the way one day it the Digital world was one minute in the real world. The Time chamber was like that, except one day outside world was equal One year inside.
“Wow… a whole year in one day.” Said Yolei.
Good job, Yolei, you can repeat basic information. You’re almost at the cognitive level of a three-year-old.
Soon it became clear the they were all going to spend a whole year training in the Time Chamber, this would give them plenty of time to work out their aspects and faults.
Plus, Davis and Veemon could improve some of their own training skills.
Not that they NEEd to, right, Mykan?
“Well what are we waiting for… let’s get too it!” said Davis.
“YEAH!!!” the others cried out. They all climbed in and Gennai Shut the door behind them.
After that… training was on…
The hours approaching, just give it your best
You got to reach your prime.
That’s when you need to put yourself to the test,
And show us a passage of time,
Were going to need a montage (montage)
Oh it takes a montage (montage
Wanna know the really stupid part of Mykan using the Montage song, which was meant as a joke?
That’s not the first time he’s used it in a story when he needed a timeskip. Apparently saying “one week later” is beneath him or something.
Davis taught the others how to conserve the Ki-Energies, and how to power them up to get stronger.
And Ex-Veemon taught the other Digimon things like, how to keep one step ahead of your opponent’s moves.
Which they…couldn’t already do? What?
Sure a lot of things happing at once,
With mind, everyone what’s going on (what’s going on?)
And when every shot you show a little improvement
Just Show it or it will take to long
that’s called a montage (montage)
Oh we want montage (montage)
Eventually The Digimon caught on and became much stronger like Ex-Veemon, and they even fought against their partners so that they could build up even more strength.
Um…shouldn’t that kill them? I mean, I know that the trainers have Dragonball Z powers and all, but…you know…Digimon. They’re kinda tough.
And anything that we want to know, from just a beginner to a pro,
You want a montage (montage)
even rocky had a montage (montage)
“Okay Cody…” said Davis, “Jus like me now. Hold your position, focus all your rage and power and… AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!”
Davis: “You can pass the kidney stone!”
and poof, he became his Super Saiyan self.
Cody focused, and focused, and… “AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!”
Wow, there must be some kind of epidemic with all these stones to pass…
he too became a Super Saiyan.
Anything that we want to know, from just a beginner to a pro,
You need a montage (montage)
Oh it takes a montage (montage)
The others wished they could become a Super Saiyans like Cody and Davis, but unfortunately that require for you to have at least two Digieggs.
Step one: stick the Digiballs in the time chamber.
Step two: wish for Super Special Awesome Saiyan powers.
Step three: beat up the rest of the bad guys.
This isn’t that hard, people.
But Ken only had one crest, and so did TK and Kari. Plus the Super Saiyan gene was on the “Y” chromosomes of DNA, so only men could achieve that power.
Wow, this chapter is just all kinds of terrible, isn’t it? First the thing with the gays and now that catastrophe!
Still, that didn’t mean they couldn’t do their bests to. They had Super powers, and now it seemed that they had mastered them all the way.
Always fade out in a montage,
If you fade out, it seem like more time
Has passed in a montage,
The next day…
Gennai opened the chamber door and let them out. They looked much stronger now than before.
Except for the womenfolk, who didn’t have Y chromosomes and were therefore shit-tier, I guess?
Kari and Yolei even had longer hair, but they cut it back to their normal sizes. Davis was even able to stay in Super Saiyan without having to focus his power too much.
The only bad thing was, the other Digimon were stronger than before now, but still couldn’t Spirit Digivolve. Well they didn’t really mind that too much now.
Then why is it a bad thing?
“We’re ready!” said Davis.
Gennai gave them all final briefing, and a discovery he had made that could help them find and defeat the Band of Seven faster.
The seeds of light.
But…he already knew about those, right?
They gave off a tremendous wave energy that they all could sense. Event the Digimon could sense it.
Now the Seeds also seemed to act as the source of their powers. All they had to do, was either pull it out of their warriors, or blow up their bodies.
You’d think blowing up their bodies would be enough, and that they didn’t need to know about this whole “Seed of Light” nonsense.
Either way, it would destroy them, and hopefully when all the Warriors were destroyed the Destiny stones would be restored, and the Digital world would return to normal.
“Right… let’s go then!” said Davis. All the Digimon Digivolved to their up-most forms, and down they went.
And that concludes this shockingly bigoted episode of Digiball Z! Will Davis finally become the Grand Wizard of the KKK like he’s been working for in secret all along? Will Veemon enact his plan to purge the world of the untermenschen? I hope we don’t find out next time, on Digiball Z!