1607: I’ll protect you – Chapter 8

 

Title: I’ll protect you
Author: Sessh-Amy
Media: Video Games
Topic: Slender: The Eight Pages
Genre: Romance/Hurt/Comfort
URL: Chapter 8

 

—WARNING—

— CONTAINS NIPPLES

—AND HIPS—

 

 

Welcome back to another chapter, Patrons!

The last chapter was mostly a very protracted fight sequence between Slendpai and the three wendigoes which resulted in the dismemberment of Christmas Moose (which is a shame because I really liked that nickname) and the revelation that Slendpai is vulnerable to Horned Gollum’s hypnosis power even though he doesn’t have any frickin’ eyes.

I’ve salted the rafters with mines and posted mercenary squirrels in the vents and ninjas in the hallway so I think I’m safe from Syl and the Society of Smut. Probably. Those girls are harder to get rid of than crabgrass.

To the fic!

 Author’s note*

Huh. The last couple of chapters didn’t have a beginning Author’s Note so I had assumed the trend would continue. Looks like I was wrong.

HEllo HEllo!

The author is Phone Guy?

SO here is the next chapter! I didnt really care to fix mistakes.

Wait, does that mean you’ve been correcting your errors? Because I haven’t seen a lot of evidence to support that claim.

I made read this, she found it humorous.

Think you proper noun there.

Idk if that;s a good thing XD

That would all depend on [ERROR:NAME NOT FOUND]’s sense of humor, since comedy is a very subjective thing. Many people find clowns funny, but there are also many people who find them terrifying.

ENjoy!

~x~

Given that the quality of your writing appears to have degraded quite sharply from the last chapter, I find that unlikely.

Tears ran down the little boys red cheeks as blood trickled from his scrapped knees. He hiccupped silently to himself as he wondered through the forest, looking for his tall “friend.”

…Welp, I’m lost.

There’s no POV Tag, which is a little odd considering the fic has primarily been yo-yoing between Thaddeus and Slendpai, and it’s all in italics, so I assume that means this is probably a flashback of some sort.

He wiped the snot from his nose with the sleeve of his shirt and came to a stop. “Tall man?” he whimpered, swallowing the lump in his throat. “The big kids were mean to me again,” he explains, wiping the tears from his eyes,

Ewww. I hope you didn’t use the same sleeve that you wiped your nose on, because that would be a great way to get a nasty eye infection.

“they called me stupid and said I couldn’t play with them anymore.”

Yeah, kids can be real assholes. But don’t worry; maybe one foggy Christmas Eve Santa will ask you to guide his sleigh.

The small boy clenched his eyes shut tightly as a way of blocking out the bad memories. “They pushed me and I got hurt,” he whimpered, bringing his hands up to his eyes.

Again – kids can be assholes. Especially to someone they perceive as smaller and weaker than themselves.

I told daddy that they were mean to me, but he said he was busy working,” the boy continued.

Your father is also an asshole. To be fair, if Daddy Asshole is working then there isn’t much he can do. It’s not as if he could drive home from work to beat up some kid who picked on his son.

“I told Anna too, but she told me that I deserved it for killing mom.” A cough escaped the boy’s lips.

:checks wrist:

Is it time to drag the “my sister is a mega-bitch” horse out of the Dead Horse Stables and give it a few more whacks already? My, how the fic does drag on.

“Why doesn’t anyone like me?” he finally whimpered, falling to his knees and sobbing quietly.

Oh, for the love of monkeys! This author really loves cranking the emo knob up to eleven, doesn’t she?

That’s when he felt a large hand lie on his head. The small boy wiped the tears from his eyes and looked up to see the creature touching him.

Oh, I’m not going to like this.

I like you… The man with no face stated, running his hand down from the boys head to cup his small cheek.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

Never forget Thaddeus, I like you and will always be here for you, he said before picking Thaddeus up and cradling him in his arms.

That’s kind of sweet, but also really creepy considering the direction this fic is going.

The blonde boy smiled up at his friend and hugs him. “Tall man, you’re my best friend,” the boy sighed, nuzzling his face on the tall man’s suit.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

I think Thaddeus has some sort of nuzzling fetish.

“That’s what happens when you rear by hand rather than breastfeeding.”

GAHHH! :falls out of chair:

:click!: “This is going on Instagram.”

Dammit, Syl! How did you get in here?

“I can be very persuasive when I want to be.”

…I don’t even want to know what that means.

You’re mine as well child, the tall man cooed, tightening his hold on the small blond.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

“That looks like fun! Can I give it a go?”

Touch Mr. Crowbar and I will hurt you.

“Yes’m.”

Let’s play a game!” Thaddeus giggled, pulling on the tall man’s suit. “Let’s play hide and seek!”

:snergles: “So. Many. Inappropriate jokes…”

Could you at least pretend to be a mature and responsible adult?

:Syl giggles uncontrollably:

:Ghostie facepalms:

As you wish, the tall man said before placing his large hand over the boy’s scrapped knees. Small warmth spread throughout the boy’s legs, making him sigh in satisfaction. Five seconds later, the tall man removed his colossal hand and placed the small boy on the ground.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

Did Slendpai just quote a line from The Princess Bride?

“That’s what you’re focusing on? I thought you’d be in a tizzy over this new healing ability.”

That’s actually shown up before, although like most of Slendpai’s powers it isn’t used in a very consistent manner; when Gerald and his assorted minions…

“That’s a terrible name for a band.”

:glares at Syl: When they attacked Thaddeus in the woods and Slendpai easily kicked their collective asses, he deposited them in their homes and the whole thing was supposed to be a bad dream to them – but Slendpai didn’t heal any of the wounds they picked up during the confrontation. It’s difficult to convince yourself that something was a dream if you have physical evidence to the contrary.

 Thank you,” the boy giggled, referring to his now healed knees. “You count and I’ll hide!” The boy cheered before running off into the forest, no longer sad or in tears.

“I think Slendpai prefers to do the ‘hiding’, sunshine.”

:Ghostie facepalms:

Yes child, the boy heard the creature say as he searched around the area. One… Two… Three… he heard his friend count in his head. Panicking, the boy went further through the trees. Six… seven… A large smile plastered on the boy’s lips when he saw a small opening under a large tree.

I guess the author has completely abandoned any attempts to keep Slendpai a touch-telepath.

Ten, he heard the tall man say before he hurried inside the small hole.

:Syl starts buttering the popcorn:

NOT LIKE THAT!

He, he,” the boy giggled before covering his mouth with his hands, trying to stay silent.

“Why bother?”

You do know how this game is played, right?

“I’m well-versed in all sorts of games, peaches.”

:sighs: Must you turn everything into an innuendo?

:shrugs: “It’s part of my charm.”

No one thinks you’re charming. Can we get back to the fic, please? You were saying something about how Thaddeus is playing hide and seek.

“Oh, right. Thaddeus was being quiet when he doesn’t have to be.”

That is kind of the point of hiding, you know.

“But how is he able to hear anything? Slendpai doesn’t have any ears.”

:Ghostie opens her mouth to respond, then closes it and stares into space for several minutes:

“Did I break your brain, dear heart?”

:Ghostie blinks slowly:

It’s just … Shit. I’ve been so focused on his lack of eyes and mouth that I forgot about him missing ears, too. Talking with someone could be chalked up to an aspect of his variable telepathy, but all that business with him listening to the wind in the last chapter? That shouldn’t have happened at all.

“He could be using that telepathy you loathe so much and piggy-backing on the senses of other creatures.”

I guess so, but it looks as if the author is just writing him like she would any character with the usual arrangement of sensory organs.

“How boring.”

Thaddeus? He heard the suited man call. Hmm, where could this child be? Thaddeus remained silent as his heart rate quickened in excitement. Thaddeus? Come out, come out, where ever you are, the man called in a sing song voice.

“I assume he’s just humoring the child?”

:shrugs: I dunno. That’s usually what happens when an adult plays a game with a child. If Slendpai really does have a telepathic link it should be really easy for him to locate Thaddeus.

Thaddeus giggled before taking a peek of his head out of the small hole. He looked left and he looks right. The tall man is nowhere to be found. He isn’t even calling out for him anymore. Furrowing his brows in worry, Thaddeus steps out of the small hole.

For some reason I’m getting this weird mental image of Slendpai crouched nearby, doing that pre-pounce butt wiggle that cats do before they attack.

“Methinks you spend too much time with your cats.”

No such thing.

Found you! The man said before grabbing the boy from behind and hoisting him up.

HA! :does the I’m Right Dance:

“No one likes a braggart, Ghostie.”

Oh, before I forget;

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

“Pity you didn’t start a counter for those.”

Well, I’m not doing it now.

Thaddeus shrieks in surprise. He then puffs his cheeks and glares at the tall man over his shoulder. “You cheated!”

“Since when is waiting out your prey considered cheating? If he wasn’t a little fidget-fuss, he would still be safe.”

You’re trying to apply logic to the actions of a child.

My apologies, the man chuckled before hugging the child in apology.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

“Easy there, sport.”

“…Its okay,” the boy said before smiling once again. “Next time promise you won’t cheat?” the boy asked, extending his pinky finger.

“For the last time, that wasn’t cheating!”

Since when did you become an advocate for fair play?

“I do have standards, you know. ”

:Ghostie snorts:

I promise, the man agreed. He extends his long, white, pinky finger towards Thaddeus and locks fingers with the boy.

“No thwacking for that one?”

I don’t think pinky-swearing counts as a bad touch.

“Clearly you haven’t been doing it right.”

Okay!” The boy smiled before grabbing the collar of the Tall man’s suit and pulling him down to place a small kiss on the side of his cheek. “Let’s promise to always be friends and to play with each other forever and ever!”

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

“I know exactly what sort of games Slendpai has in mind.”

:THWACK!:

He’s just a child!

“If Slendpai is as ancient as he claims, then everyone – even the eldest of humans – would be like a child to him.”

…Well, that just made things a whole lot weirder.

Of course child, I will never leave your side…

And then you promptly forgot all about him for several years.

“Oaths just aren’t worth the paper they aren’t printed on.”

~x~

“The hell is that?”

I assume that means the flashback is over.

Thaddeus P.O.V.

Yep, flashback’s over.

“Hey, it’s one of those tag things you hate so much.”

:eye-twitch: I know.

“Thaddeus? Thaddeus!”

I jumped from the sudden shout of my name. “What? Huh?!” I panicked looking around the room for the source of the yelling.

I think it’s over that way :waves at the Void: somewhere.

“Or possibly over there.” :points in opposite direction:

That’s nowhere near where I’m pointing.

“But now there’s a fifty-fifty chance that one of us is right.”

I don’t think that’s how the math works.

“Thaddeus!” Anna yelled from the other side of my door. She slammed her fist on the locked door. “I know you’re awake!”

“Is she watching a live stream of his bedroom?”

I don’t think anyone wants to watch a live stream of a teenage boy’s bedroom.

“You must be new to the Internet.”

“What do you want?!” I groaned before covering my head with my bed covers.

“Dad said he’s coming home early today, so I expect you to make this place look spotless!” she said.

“So now he’s Cinderella?”

If talking mice show up, I’m bailing.

“That’s a woman’s job!” I sneered, quickly getting in a bad mood.

:Ghostie looks at Syl:

:Syl looks at Ghostie:

“Did he just say what I think he said?”

:rolls up sleeves: Oh, it is on now. :pokes Thaddeus with Mr. Crowbar: You just lost whatever shred of sympathy I might have still had for you. No more Ms. Nice Librarian.

“I suddenly feel like I should be somewhere else.”

“That’s why I’m telling you to do it!” she yelled, probably smirking from her sassy remark.

BAAA!

:a massive wall of wool charges through the Chamber:

“The twinkle lights are new.”

The Darkwraiths must have started decorating for Sithmas early this year.

I huffed before angrily tossing the covers off of my body and sitting up on my bed. “I’m heading to work now; you better do as I say or you won’t eat dinner tonight!” she warned before walking away, the sound of her footsteps now fading away.

What, she’s not going to make him cook dinner on top of cleaning the house?

“Mayhap she’s going to fit him with a muzzle before unlocking the cupboards?”

I don’t think they make muzzles for people.

“Are you quite certain this isn’t your first day on the Internet?”

I took long, deep, breaths to sooth my heart. It was still running a mile from the rude awakening. “Selfish witch,” I grumbled, before stretching my arms over my head.

“So Anna is the one who made the wendigoes?”

What? No! Why would you say that?

“Christmas Moose said something about a witch, and now Thaddeus is calling his sister a witch.”

No, that’s just … I mean, not even a badfic is that painfully obvious.

“We shall see.”

“Sorry about that,” I apologized, as I turned to face the tall being.

“He’s doing what?”

I assume he’s apologizing to Slendpai for using him as a mattress.

“But Slendpai has been gone for ages, off dismembering wendigoes.”

Thaddeus isn’t the most observant person, so he probably never noticed Slendpai was gone.

“That bodes well for their relationship; neither one can keep track of the other.”

“She usually ignores me in the mornings… Slender Man?” I questioned, finally noticing that he wasn’t lying on the bed. When did he leave? I scanned my room, there’s no sign of him anywhere.

Ha! Told you so! :does I’m Right Dance:

“Must you always do that?”

Yes.

A wave of disappointment went through my body. Did he have to leave so soon? I thought maybe we could hang out for a little. A heavy sigh escapes my throat.

Great, just what the fic needs – more emo nonsense.

“I wonder when I’ll be able to see him again,” I wonder as I stood from my bed and made my way out the room and towards the bathroom.

:alarms blare:

“Oooh!”

:alarms abruptly shut off:

“Awww…”

He did say he was looking out for the Wendigoes. That probably explains why he left early. How many Wendigoes are there anyway? Can he take on all of them? If they look half as big and scary as the Wendigo I saw yesterday then I don’t think Slender Mans got a chance, being so skinny and all.

You mean the wendigo that didn’t do anything to you and just ran off like a scalded cat after Slendpai gave him a verbal warning? Yeah, he was just … terrifying.

“That scaredy-bitch Deer Skull Hat is a prime example of why you should never judge your opponent’s fighting abilities by their physical appearance.”

Well… I’m not exactly sure how strong Slender Man is. He has lots of strange powers.

“Strange powers that only appear when the situation demands it.”

And that he rarely uses to their full advantage.

I walk into the bathroom. Turning on the sink, I began rinsing my face. My mind drifted off to the dream I had.

:loud snore:

“Shall I kiss m’lady to awaken her?”

GAHHH! :falls out of chair:

:Syl snaps another picture:

You can leave any time, you know.

“But I’m having so much fun!”

“I think it was a memory,” I told myself, drying my face with a nearby towel. That had to be a memory; the scenario was too realistic and familiar to be called a dream.

That could just mean you have really boring dreams. Not every dream is a non-stop roller coaster ride of excitement, if they were you’d never get any rest.

“I’ve often wondered what it would be like to dream.”

You don’t dream? How can you not dream? Everyone has dreams when they sleep! Just because you don’t remember them doesn’t mean you don’t have them.

“I don’t sleep, therefore I cannot dream.”

…Bullshit. I’ve seen you unconscious before – usually crammed into some nook or cranny where you shouldn’t be.

“Passing out and sleeping are two very different things, you know.”

Huh. I can’t really argue with that. But it’s just so … so … so abnormal.

:Syl stares at Ghostie:

What?

“Of all the things you know about me, that’s what you consider abnormal?”

Well … It’s near the top of the list.

“You’re an odd bird, has anyone ever told you that?”

Constantly.

So I have met Slender man before. A small smile formed on my lips before I began brushing my teeth. How could I have forgotten him, my only friend? I wonder what other things we’ve done together back then. How did I react when we first met? Why did we stop seeing each other?

I furrowed my brows in wonder. “…I will never leave your side…” He said this, but he never kept his word… I’m going to have to ask him what happened.

All good questions that the audience will likely never get answers to.

“Silly Ghostie; you assume that there’s anyone left in the audience who still cares about that nonsense and isn’t just skimming through the chapters looking for hot tentacle-on-teenager action.”

Spitting out the paste from my mouth, I look at myself in the medical cabinet’s mirror before leaving and heading to my room. A yawn escapes my lips as soon as I entered my room. Anna is such a jerk, waking me up from such a good dream. A blush formed on my cheeks. The reason it was such a good dream was because Slender man was in it. I shook my head, in an attempt to erase the embarrassing thoughts, and walked to my closet. I removed my shirt from my body and swung the closet door open.

So. Much. Daybooking.

“I’m a bit disappointed that he didn’t mention what flavor the toothpaste was.”

I guess we’ll never know.

Looking through my closet I pulled out a blue, plaid, button up shirt and another plaid shirt, except its grey. “Which one should I wear?” I asked myself, thinking hard.

“Don’t strain yourself, darling.”

The grey one, it would hug your body pleasantly,

Wha?!?

“You think so? Well I guess I’ll settle for the grey one,” I answered, before placing the blue plaid shirt back on the hanger and in my closet.

Wait for it…

I began to slide my hand through one of the shirt’s sleeves until it hit me, did I just hear Slender man’s voice? I turned my head to look behind me. “Slender Man!” I exclaimed excitedly.

:Syl catches a shoe in midair and chucks it at Thaddeus:

You’re supposed to let that drop, you know.

“My way is better.”

Good morning Thaddeus, the tall man said, nodding his head. He was sitting on the edge of my bed, with one foot crossed on top of the other.

Why is he sitting like that?

“I think Slendpai has to pee.”

That’s an image I didn’t need in my brain.

“Good morning to you too,” I smiled, walking over to him. “Where did you go if you don’t mind me asking?”

Who are you, his keeper?

“It’s been the other way ’round, hasn’t it?”

Yeah, for the most part. Thaddeus gets himself into trouble and then Slendpai swoops in to save him.

Warding off vermin, he explained, probably talking about the Wendigoes.

Thus eliminating the need for Thaddeus to ask any pesky follow-up questions regarding what should be a very cryptic comment.

“Slendpai explains with out really explaining anything. If the unholy abomination gig doesn’t pan out, he could have a promising future as a politician.”

He brings his hand up to my face and brushed my hair behind my ear. I felt my face grow hot from the small action. How was your morning my kitten?

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

“Kitten?” I questioned,

:Ghostie headdesks:

He’s only wondering about that nickname now?

“I thought you didn’t like it when Slendpai called Thaddeus kitten or child?”

I don’t mind ‘kitten’ as much as ‘child’ since ‘kitten’ is a fairly common term of endearment, but he’s called Thaddeus that dozens of times now. How could he have failed to notice that?

“well, Anna woke me up to clean the house. She wasn’t too nice about it either,” I scoffed, folding my arms.

“Did the witch even give a reason for this task?”

I think it was because their father was going to be coming home early from work.

“And?”

I think that was it. :checks fic: Yeah, that was it.

“Do they suffer from a lack of lamps in the home?”

I … I don’t know. I assume they have lights of some sort, most households do. Why do you ask?

“I was just wondering if the filthy squalor they usually live in is shrouded by the dark but would be exposed to their father if he enters the house before nightfall at that is the reason for the hasty scrub-up.”

…That’s one interpretation, I guess.

I see… he said, drifting off. I tilted my head and gave him a questioning look. He wasn’t looking at my face. He may not have eyes but I can tell when someone is looking elsewhere when their face is facing a different direction.

That’s true, but even if his “face” was pointing directly at you he still wouldn’t be looking at you since HE HAS NO EYES.

“If he hasn’t got any eyes, how would he have learned a mannerism like that?”

…That’s an excellent question. He wouldn’t have to avoid someone’s gaze out of embarrassment or guilt or any other emotion since he doesn’t have any features that would betray his own thoughts or feelings. I assume it’s more of the author treating the character like someone with the standard sensory organs.

“Is something wrong?” I asked, furrowing my brows in worry. His head was facing my chest.

“Hey, buddy; his eyes are up there.” :points:

How could Thaddeus tell Slendpai wasn’t looking at his face? It’s pretty obvious when someone with eyes is ogling someone else, but Slendpai would have to have his head positioned in a very exaggerated manner to convey the same information.

Why is that? Is there something on my shirt or- “Whoa!” I nearly shrieked before turning my back towards Slender Man, trying to hide my exposed chest from him. “W-Why didn’t you tell me I wasn’t wearing my shirt?!” I scolded, quickly slipping the shirt on and fidgeting with the buttons.

“I thought he was wearing the shirt? He put his arms in it and everything.”

Technically he is, he just didn’t button it up yet.

“That’s the problem with your dimension; people wear too many clothes. Represses the population’s natural instincts.”

He chuckles lightly behind me. Let me help you, he says before gently turning me around, making me face him.

Oh, I am not going to like this.

:Syl plugs in the popcorn popper:

He gently tugs on my arms, bringing me closer to him. His colossal, cool hands touch my bare chest, making me flinch from how cold they were.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

“Oooh, a gentle embrace that calls to mind the touch of a day-old corpse. How sexy!”

I can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic or creepy.

“It’s about fifty-fifty.”

:Ghostie glares at Syl:

“Alright, sixty-forty.”

“W-What are you doing?” I asked, feeling my whole face turn red from embarrassment.

“Good God. Not even that glitter-obsessed lizard is this innocent.”

Yeah, there’s not many purely platonic reasons to run your hands over someone else’s bare chest.

Inspecting your body, he said, running his hand down towards my abdomen.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

“W-Why would you need to inspect it?” I stuttered, feeling shivers run up and down my spine.

Why do you think he’s doing it, to check your meat for tenderness?

“In a manner of speaking, he could be doing just that.”

Ewww.

He didn’t answer; instead he kept on running his hands all around my chest and back.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

:fills bowl with popcorn: “Bring on the appendages!”

I gasped when his fingers brushed one of my nipples.

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

“Oh, no! Not his nipple!”

Great, now I’m going to have to add a disclaimer to this chapter.

That felt strange! It made my hands feel tingly and my stomach flutter up.

Is Thaddeus getting turned on or suffering from food poisoning?

“Could be both.” :sniff-sniff: “I think this butter’s gone a bit off.”

I hope you didn’t get that from the clan’s stash.

Slender Man didn’t seem to notice my reaction to this. He was still fixated on my body.

“Must have been food poisoning then.”

Why do you say that?

“Because when a human, male or female, becomes aroused certain unmistakable physiological changes take place; respiration and heart rate increases, the skin flushes, the areolae contract, pupils widen, and so forth. I have diagrams, if you’d like to see…”

No, thanks! I’m good.

An inaudible sigh of relief escapes my lips. I’m glad he didn’t notice. I don’t want him making fun of me!

…Wow.

“Not even the cloistered acolytes of the Scarlet Order were so ignorant of the games of man and maid.”

Man and man; or I guess it’s man and presumably male humanoid.

“Whatever.”

Slender Man P.O.V.

Oh, great; a mid-scene perspective shift. Could it get any worse that that?

“Did you forget that Slendpai is putting the moves on Thaddeus? And that he is probably going to be thinking all sorts of naughty thoughts?”

…Thank you for making it worse, Syl.

“I do my best. Worst. What have you.”

I ran my hands over the boy’s small hips.

Oh, gods; please don’t go there.

:Syl swipes her phone:

“The new girl is on her way with a kettle of Brain BleaChai.”

The big pot?

“Of course. I also tacked on another disclaimer.”

:Koori poofs into the Chamber and deposits a pot of tea bigger than she is on the desk, which groans under the weight, before poofing out in a swirl of leaves:

:filling mug with BleaChai: Remind me to fill out another customer service card at the Coffee Shack.

:swipes again: “Already done. You called her an ethereal nymph of compassion.”

That doesn’t sound even remotely like something I’d say. Can you even call someone an ‘ethereal nymph’ after they beat a kraken at arm-wrestling?

“You have no poetry in your soul.”

His skin is very smooth, almost like a newborn’s.

:Ghostie takes the lid off of the teapot and sticks her head inside:

“Ugh. Even I know it’s not appropriate to compare your potential lover to a newborn babe.”

His figure is petite and looks almost fragile. I don’t know how anybody would want to harm this beautiful body. I ran my fingers over his flat stomach.

“Ewww.”

:Ghostie lifts her head out of the teapot:

Did I just hear you say ‘ewww’?

“You did indeed.”

How … unlike you.

“Even I wouldn’t stoop to seducing a child.”

You hit on the pizza boy last week!

“I checked first; he’s of legal age. And smells delicious.”

:Ghostie headteapots:

 This area use to be coated with scars and bruises. They’d still be visible if I had not healed him.

That doesn’t give you the right to grope him like a drunken prom date.

“You’d think a near-immortal being would have better control over their base desires.”

Pot, this is Kettle. Have you met?

I’m amazed no one came to Thaddeus’ rescue. How did this go unnoticed?

It really shouldn’t have, but the whole town seems to be suffering from a severe lack of adult supervision.

“And Slendpai healed all the scars, so there was no evidence that any of these wounds ever existed even if Thaddeus should get off his narrow ass and tell one of those absent adults.”

I gazed up at the boys small pecks, they were well defined.

“I don’t think that’s the right word for Thaddeus’ man-boobs.”

No, it’s not. And don’t call them that!

“Man-breasts?”

Looking through the boy’s thoughts, I can see he used to spend most of his time swimming.

:headdesks: Because why bother interacting with your love interest and getting to know them when you can just yank the information out of their grey matter without their consent?

“Do you need something stronger than BleaChai?”

No, it’s just … GRRRR! This is my primary problem with badly written telepathic characters; they violate other characters in the most intimate way imaginable and don’t see any of the many problems that would arise from doing so.

I reached up and lightly brush my fingers over his semi erect, pink, nipple.

:THWACK!:

VERY BAD TOUCH!

:throws popcorn at Ghostie: “Down in front!”

He gasps from the small action and shivers. I resisted the urge to chuckle.

Because seducing a child is so frickin’ hilarious.

“Well, not when you put it that way.”

It’s expected for Thaddeus to act this way, with his raging hormones making him sexually frustrated and all.

Sudden change in narrative tone is sudden.

“And from behind!”

Sadly that does seem to be the direction things are heading.

:pouts: “You’re no fun.”

He thinks I didn’t notice his reaction to my touch? Well then, let’s see how far I will go until I finally “notice.”

Slendpai is getting so very date-rapey right now.

“Bet you a nickel Slendpai does the old ‘Oops, I dropped my penis down your anus!’ gambit.”

I seriously doubt that’s a real thing.

“Doesn’t mean it wouldn’t happen.”

“Hng,” Thaddeus bit back a moan as both my fingers brushed his sensitive nipple.

:THWACK!:

VERY, VERY BAD TOUCH!

I glance up at his flushed face. His eyes were clenched shut and he was biting his lower lip. “S-Slender Man,” he stuttered before looking at me with half lid eyes.

That was quick.

“Youth today.” :shakes her head: “No stamina. It’s all those video games, I’d wager.”

I guess you’ve never spent seven hours trying to beat FNAF2 on 10/20 mode.

“Are you even speaking English right now?”

My heart rammed inside my chest and my hands were itching to do more.

There’s a cream for that.

“Or give that parasite-fondling bastard a call, he’ll be glad to get the work.”

Ishi-sensei has a name, you know.

Without thinking, I brought Thaddeus closer to my chest and held him by the hips.

:THWACK!:

EXCEPTIONALLY BAD TOUCH!

“Think I have time to nip out to the commissary for more butter?”

He looked up at me with longing eyes and his thoughts were clouded up with lust.

Yeah, but Thaddeus is (presumably) a healthy young male who appears to be somewhere in his mid to late teens; it doesn’t take much to make a teenaged boy horny.

“Poor little dears are just full up near to bursting with hormones and confusion, and it doesn’t take much to make them pop.”

I cupped his cheek and inched my face closer to his. Thaddeus closed his eyes and perked his lips, expecting a kiss. Thaddeus…

:THWACK!:

BAD TOUCH!

The sound of a door unlocking brought me back to my senses. Out of instinct, I pushed myself away from Thaddeus and quickly dashed behind the boy to hide inside the closet.

“Damn it all!”

Thank goodness. Wait, why did Slendpai run and hide in the closet?

“He cannot accept the truth of his own sexuality?”

It’s not that closet! Slendpai can teleport; he could teleport into the closet faster than he could run across the room. He’s not even limited to remaining in the same room, so if he was really concerned about being found he could be back in the forest in the blink of an eye.

“Wha-” Thaddeus uttered out before a female voice interrupted him.

“Thaddeus! You better not be sleeping!” the female yelled from where she was. I can only guess it was his older sister, Anna.

Dude, you were inside Thaddeus’ head; you shouldn’t have to guess that it’s his sister.

“Slendpai had other things he was interested in getting into. Like Thaddeus’ shirt.”

“Uhg, I’m awake!” Thaddeus yelled before sitting on his bed and buttoning his shirt.

“Parts of him are very much awake now, if you know what I mean.”

Yes, I know what you mean. Everyone knows.

:stage whispers: “I’m talking about his penis!”

You really didn’t need to clarify that.

“Good,” his sister yelled back before walking around, doing whatever she was doing.

What she’s actually doing isn’t important, since she exists only to give Thaddeus someone to bitch about.

“Cock-blocking witch.”

I placed my hand over my beating heart. What was I about to do to this child?

If you don’t know, I’m not going to tell you.

“I’d be happy to give you a few pointers…”

:Ghostie spritzes Syl with a water bottle:

No! Bad minion!

HISSSSS!”

The innocent and lust filled look in his features made me want to savor him.

I suppose a paradoxical expression like that is easy to interpret when you don’t have any eyes.

I was so close to losing myself to lust that I nearly took Thaddeus then and there.

“Damn that cock-blocking witch to the fathoms of Hell!”

My heart went back to its regular beating. Funny, I almost forgot what it was like to lust over someone. It has been centuries since I last held a person in my arms.

“Liar. You held Christmas Moose in your arms earlier that very day.”

I don’t think dismembering someone is what he had in mind.

“Don’t knock it ’til you try it, dimples.”

“I left food on the counter,” Anna yelled before the sound of locking was heard.

“They must have impressive locks if the sound of them locking carries across the entire Void.”

Did she just leave? She didn’t even bid her goodbyes.

:Ghostie headteapots:

Slendpai is as unobservant as all the other adults in this town; despite having intimate knowledge of how Thaddeus has been treated, he seems puzzled at Anna’s cold behaviour.

“I’m sorry, did you say something?”

There was a small moment of silence in the room before Thaddeus voice broke through. “Slender Man?” he hesitated saying. I emerged from the close not a second later and approached him. He averted his gaze away from me and had a crimson blush on his cheeks. “Um…”

:porno music blasts through the Library speakers:

SYL!

“Madame, I am insulted! I had nothing to do with this.”

Oh, really?

“Of course not. I’ve been sitting right here in front of you the entire time.”

:crosses arms over chest: If you have nothing to hide, then show me your cell phone.

“…No?”

I cupped his cheek in my hand and force him to look at my face.

The face that you DO NOT HAVE.

“You’re like a dog with a bone over this face thing.”

It wouldn’t be so irritating if the author wasn’t constantly drawing attention to the discrepancy by having Slendpai always forcing Thaddeus to look at his non-existent face. I assume it’s meant to be a romantic gesture, but it’s starting to feel a little abusive.

He has an unsure and worried look in his eyes, and his mind kept questioning if he did something wrong.

Right, because you wanted him to molest you in your bedroom.

“He didn’t say no.”

I didn’t see him say ‘Yes’, either. A lack of protest shouldn’t be considered consent. Hell, Thaddeus was hoping that Slendpai wouldn’t notice his reaction because he was afraid Slendpai would make fun of him!

I knelt down on one foot and brought Thaddeus into a tight embrace. He gasped from the action and tensed for a moment before relaxing. My sincere apologies, I said while running my hand up and down his back.

Yeah, that’s not going to send him any mixed signals.

“Uhg- I-it’s okay,” he stuttered. Placing his hands on my shoulders he gently pushes me away to stare at my face.

AGAIN WITH THE FACE!

:rubs ears: “Do you mind keeping it down?”

“Um, I don’t mind,” he laughs nervously while averting his eyes away and scratching the back of his head.

What don’t you mind? I asked with a tilt of my head.

“Slendpai quite enjoys toying with his prey, doesn’t he?”

I think he’s supposed to be teasing Thaddeus, but combined with everything else … It’s just really unsettling.

“Um,” he says, laughing harder. His whole face was red now. I chuckled at his innocent behavior. He may be older now, but he’s still the innocent child I took care of so many years ago.

And yet you still seem determined to seduce him.

“There’s no accounting for taste.”

I was taken aback when his lips kissed the area where I’m supposed have lips of my own.

And where you sometimes do have lips, but only when you have a mouth. Which you don’t always have and aren’t really supposed to have at all.

“Slendpai has surprisingly complex features for someone without a face.”

He pulled away and gazed into my face.

GAHHH!

“Here, have more BleaChai.”

“T-This,” he says, in response to my previous question. I traced the area he kissed. It felt nice; I even felt my stomach react to it in a positive way.

That’s your criteria for a romantic partner, that they don’t make you physically ill?

“You say that as if it were a bad thing.”

Oh, you think it’s a good thing?

“I think it’s prudent and practical, especially when you are considering taking a lover of a different species. Discovering that you are allergic to your partner while in the midst of an intimate act is embarrassing for both parties.”

I nuzzled my face on the crook of his neck.

FUCKING HOW?!?!

“They haven’t gotten to the fucking yet.”

:Ghostie headteapots:

You’re too cute, my kitten, I purred before pulling away and standing up to my feet. He smiled up at me before heading out the door.

“I’m going to clean the house for a bit, do you want to hang out afterwards?” he asked as I followed him.

That sounds like a fun date; Slendpai sits around doing nothing while Thaddeus cleans the house.

“Sounds suspiciously like a woefully stereotypical marriage to me. Will Thaddeus be vacuuming in pearls and high heels?”

Doubtful. The author seems to favor anime and manga tropes, though, so I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s a little ‘Hadaka Apron’ action in a future chapter.

“I’ll have to replenish my popcorn and butter supplies.”

If you wish, I said, making my way towards his living room. But first, I need to give you information regarding the Wendigoes.

Oh, goody; that means there’s going to be an expositional info-dump to wade through.

“It can’t be much of a dump, he doesn’t know anything about them.”

Meh. He probably just “read their auras” or some such nonsense.

 

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97 Comments on “1607: I’ll protect you – Chapter 8”

  1. AdmiralSakai says:

    —WARNING—

    — CONTAINS NIPPLES—

    —AND HIPS—

    In that order?

  2. AdmiralSakai says:

    I made read this, she found it humorous.

    You made [DATA EXPUNGED] read this? And She found it humorous?

    Run.

  3. AdmiralSakai says:

    HEllo HEllo!

    SO here is the next chapter!

    YOu know, EVery time I think the authors here CAnnot possibly develop a more ANnoying typing quirk, THey go and prove me wrong.

    • GhostCat says:

      I’m guilty of it sometimes, but that’s mainly due to a sticky Shift key on my laptop.

      • BatJamags says:

        I sometimes do it just because I’m typing too fast and I can’t get my finger off the shift key fast enough, but there’s this wonderful invention called the backspace button which fixes it in two keystrokes.

  4. AdmiralSakai says:

    The small boy clenched his eyes shut tightly as a way of blocking out the bad memories.

    That’s not how it works.

  5. AdmiralSakai says:

    “Why doesn’t anyone like me?” he finally whimpered,

    Because you’re a one-dimensional sorrow sponge?

  6. AdmiralSakai says:

    It’s just … Shit. I’ve been so focused on his lack of eyes and mouth that I forgot about him missing ears, too. Talking with someone could be chalked up to an aspect of his variable telepathy, but all that business with him listening to the wind in the last chapter? That shouldn’t have happened at all.

    “He could be using that telepathy you loathe so much and piggy-backing on the senses of other creatures.”

    I guess so, but it looks as if the author is just writing him like she would any character with the usual arrangement of sensory organs.

    I always assumed Slenderman had the ability to sense its environment with the same fidelity as a human, its eyes and ears were just not visible.

  7. AdmiralSakai says:

    :THWACK!:

    BAD TOUCH!

    “I know exactly what sort of games Slendpai has in mind.”

    :THWACK!:

    He’s just a child!

    “If Slendpai is as ancient as he claims, then everyone – even the eldest of humans – would be like a child to him.”

    …Well, that just made things a whole lot weirder.

    I ran into this when I was running Nina (age in setting of game: ~65) in her original CoC campaign, and it actually wasn’t that much of an issue. I think the original logic was something along the lines of “Deep Ones are immortal, so after they reach physical and mental maturity in their twenties a thirty-year old one is pretty much identical to a sixty-year-old one is pretty much identical to a hundred-year-old one”. She wound up getting shipped pretty heavily with a human pilot a third her age, and nobody thought it was at all weird.

    So I guess this is just regular pedophilia. How refreshing.

    • GhostCat says:

      That’s what bothers me about the Bella/Edward dynamic in the Twilight series, it’s less the fact that Edward is so much older than Bella and more that Bella is not emotionally mature enough to handle the relationship. Even when Edward does the sensible thing and tries to put some distance between them, she pitches a bitch-fit like a spoiled brat because she can’t have her pretty man-candy.

  8. AdmiralSakai says:

    ~x~

    “The hell is that?”

    An emoticon representing a cat about to puke?

  9. AdmiralSakai says:

    “Dad said he’s coming home early today, so I expect you to make this place look spotless!” she said.

    “That’s a woman’s job!” I sneered, quickly getting in a bad mood.

    “That’s why I’m telling you to do it!” she yelled,


    NICE.

  10. AdmiralSakai says:

    How could I have forgotten him, my only friend? I wonder what other things we’ve done together back then.

    I do not wanna know.

  11. DoomyDoomsdayofDoom says:

    I didnt really care to fix mistakes.

    …Bravo?

    Protip to the Author: if you lack dedication, don’t expect good results.

    • andiliteman says:

      Totally.
      You can only expect people to respect your work as much as you do.

      • DoomyDoomsdayofDoom says:

        Yes, exactly.

        I was kinda pissed off when I read that, since I recall this same author seemed to be so determined to “fix the lack of yaoi” in the Slender Man fandom. Looks like she’s going for the quantity over quality approach.

  12. This area use to be coated with scars and bruises. They’d still be visible if I had not healed him.

    That doesn’t give you the right to grope him like a drunken prom date.

    “You’d think a near-immortal being would have better control over their base desires.”

    Pot, this is Kettle. Have you met?

    I take it you’ve never been to the red-light district in Y’ha-nth’lei then.

  13. AdmiralSakai says:

    I gazed up at the boys small pecks, they were well defined.

    So, he got attacked by birds recently?

  14. The innocent and lust filled look in his features made me want to savor him.

    Maybe with a little bit of barbecue sauce?

  15. BatJamags says:

    HEllo HEllo!

    How do you make the same capitalization error twice in the same sentence when the second instance shouldn’t even be capitalized? Is this one of those authors who’s never heard of the backspace key?

  16. AdmiralSakai says:

    “You’re like a dog with a bone over this face thing.”

    Could you maybe pick a less… umm… erect simile?

    Thanks.

  17. BatJamags says:

    I made read this, she found it humorous.

    Kane: And here I thought was male all this time.

    Shows you for assuming her gender.\

    Kane: Though that does raise questions about how something unlike any form of life to exist on earth can fall under such an earthly category as gender.

    I am so triggered right now.

  18. BatJamags says:

    “Why doesn’t anyone like me?” he finally whimpered, falling to his knees and sobbing quietly.

    1. You’re a badly written character.
    2. You’re whiny and emo.
    3. You’re in a Sessh-Amy fic.
    4. CONTRIVED DRAMA
    5. Ike seems to like you, and no one likes Ike, either. Well, I like Ike, but that’s a different Ike.

  19. BatJamags says:

    “Let’s play a game!” Thaddeus giggled, pulling on the tall man’s suit. “Let’s play hide and seek!”

    You’re playing Hide and Seek with Slenderman. I know at least when I was a kid, I hated losing, so I would go to great lengths not to play games I was bad at.

    Which is actually not that different from me now, come to think of it.

  20. BatJamags says:

    Thaddeus? He heard the suited man call. Hmm, where could this child be? Thaddeus remained silent as his heart rate quickened in excitement. Thaddeus? Come out, come out, where ever you are, the man called in a sing song voice.

    I am terrified right now. This is the scariest shit that’s happened in the fic, and that’s impressive given all the bad touches going on.

  21. BatJamags says:

    ~x~

    Is_the_life_of_an_x_surrounded_by_tildes_as_dull_and_grim_as_the_life_of_a_line?

  22. BatJamags says:

    “Dad said he’s coming home early today, so I expect you to make this place look spotless!” she said.

    So… it needs to look spotless because he’s coming home early? But doesn’t he, like, come home a lot? So what’s so special about a different time of arrival that means Ugly Stepsister here has to go all taskmistress on his ass?

    And I’ll just point out that teenage girls don’t tend to be especially more responsible than teenage boys, so it just seems odd for her to be cracking the whip like this.

    • GhostCat says:

      There really doesn’t seem to be any reason for it other than to give Thaddeus something to do.

      And anyone who saw my bedroom when I was a teenager would know that teen girls are not inherently more organized than boys. I still hate doing housework; the only reason I do it at all is because the cats refuse to help.

  23. BatJamags says:

    “That’s a woman’s job!” I sneered, quickly getting in a bad mood.

    Wait, what the fuck? I thought the reason Sessh-Amy had most of the cast be male was because she’s a rabid shipper, but I never pegged her for a boomerang sexist.

  24. BatJamags says:

    I don’t think they make muzzles for people.

  25. BatJamags says:

    “So Anna is the one who made the wendigoes?”

    What? No! Why would you say that?

    “Christmas Moose said something about a witch, and now Thaddeus is calling his sister a witch.”

    No, that’s just … I mean, not even a badfic is that painfully obvious.

    “We shall see.”

    Oh goddammit that’s going to be the case, isn’t it?

  26. BatJamags says:

    “Which one should I wear?” I asked myself, thinking hard.

    This is a big decision, Thaddeus! You better not mess it up!

  27. BatJamags says:

    The grey one, it would hug your body pleasantly,

    NOPENOPENOPE

  28. BatJamags says:

    “Slendpai explains with out really explaining anything. If the unholy abomination gig doesn’t pan out, he could have a promising future as a politician.”

    We’re gonna-

    ERROR: WEEKLY TRUMP JOKE QUOTA STILL REACHED

    Build a wall-

    ERROR: STOP THAT SHIT, IT’S NOT FUNNY ANYMORE

    And make the wendigoes pay for it

    ERROR: ALRIGHT, WELL WHY DID YOU EVEN INSTALL ME, THEN?

    Lampshading the fact that I’m making tired political jokes which stopped being funny a long time ago.

    ERROR: SAYING YOU’RE DOING SOMETHING STUPID DOESN’T MAKE IT NOT STUPID

    I’m just going to hit post comment before we get into any more meta-lampshading.

  29. BatJamags says:

    “W-Why didn’t you tell me I wasn’t wearing my shirt?!”

    Ugh, stuttering. That’s almost as bad as-

    A blush formed on my cheeks.

    DON’T THINK I DIDN’T SEE YOU THERE, YOU FUCK!

    *Violence ensues*

  30. BatJamags says:

    An inaudible sigh of relief escapes my lips. I’m glad he didn’t notice. I don’t want him making fun of me!

    You’re being molested by an alien-monster-tentacle-thing, and that’s your concern?

    • GhostCat says:

      The relationship wouldn’t be quite as creepy if Thaddeus was a consenting participant, but stuff like this shows that he really doesn’t have a clue what’s going on during these little interactions.

  31. BatJamags says:

    That doesn’t sound even remotely like something I’d say. Can you even call someone an ‘ethereal nymph’ after they beat a kraken at arm-wrestling?

    Beating a Kraken at arm-wrestling is easy; they don’t have arms.

  32. BatJamags says:

    “Good,” his sister yelled back before walking around, doing whatever she was doing.

    What she’s actually doing isn’t important, since she exists only to give Thaddeus someone to bitch about.

    “Cock-blocking witch.”

    I wonder if she works for NothingCo from Heroes and Villains.

  33. Delta XIII says:

    Yeah, kids can be real assholes.

    Again – kids can be assholes.

    Your father is also an asshole.

  34. Delta XIII says:

    Dammit, Syl! How did you get in here?

    “I can be very persuasive when I want to be.”

    …I don’t even want to know what that means.

    Look, I don’t know what happened; one minute, there was an intense fight scene, then we started debating about pizza toppings, and the next thing I knew, she’d somehow slipped past me.

  35. Delta XIII says:

    “That looks like fun! Can I give it a go?”

    Touch Mr. Crowbar and I will hurt you.

    “Yes’m.”

    Aw, don’t feel bad, Syl. If you want, you can use this wooden cane I found!

  36. Delta XIII says:

    :Syl starts buttering the popcorn:

    *snatches popcorn bucket*
    Mine.
    *teleports out*

  37. Delta XIII says:

    :does the I’m Right Dance:

    Well, that was uncomfortably arousing.

  38. Delta XIII says:

    “For the last time, that wasn’t cheating!”

    Since when did you become an advocate for fair play?

    “I do have standards, you know. ”

  39. Swenia says:

    — CONTAINS NIPPLES—

    *Bursts into the room with a giant bucket of popcorn and a Big Gulp*

    We really should pull out the bleachers and put in movie theater seating. Maybe even a dining floor area.

    Also, you should probably not use the Ninja as guards. They know that I like wrestling with them.

  40. Swenia says:

    “That’s a woman’s job!” I sneered, quickly getting in a bad mood.

    *Reaches down her blouse and pulls out a Pulse Rifle*

    How about you come out here and tell me exactly what a woman’s job is, Skippy. Heck, I’ll even let you make me a sandwich while you do it.

  41. Sootopolis says:

    I jumped into this without reading the previous chapters, and had to look up the meaning of wendigo. According to the OED it’s “a cannibalistic giant; a person who has been transformed into a monster by the consumption of human flesh.” (I’m assuming this is common knowledge and I’m the only one who didn’t know this.)

    Could the author be any more annoying though, especially with the weird jumping from past to present tense. Incredibly though, I found what I thought was the was one decent line in this chapter: “It was still running a mile from the rude awakening.”

    But this is going to turn into a paedo rapefic, isn’t it? *runs off screaming*

    • GhostCat says:

      I went over the origins of the wendigo in more depth in the previous chapters; there’s usually an element of possession involved, the wendigo itself is actually a malevolent spirit that inhabits a human host and has an insatiable appetite for human flesh.

      The “it was running a mile” phrasing has actually shown up multiple times, at least four that I can remember.

      • Sootopolis says:

        Thank you! That was creepy but interesting *shudders* I have a lot of chapters to catch up on. (Btw, the OED entry states it’s from Algonquin *Indian* folklore. Forgive me if I’m wrong but I got the idea that expression was frowned upon nowadays.)

        Ugh, but what a let down by the author. One decent turn of phrase and it turns out to be an overused one 😡

      • GhostCat says:

        I think “Native American” is more commonly accepted, but the Algonquin people are comprised of a number of native tribes in the Great Lakes/Southern Quebec/Eastern Ontario area so you’d have to call them “Native Americans/Canadians”, which is a mouthful.

      • AdmiralSakai says:

        Really there isn’t a good term for that ethnic group. “Native American” is clumsy, politically-charged, and creates an arbitrary distinction between two different migrations where one is more ‘native’ than the other, and “Indian” is just inaccurate and politically charged.

        Here, though, I think it would’ve been fine with just saying ‘Algonquin’, since there really isn’t any other group by that name to confuse with the creators of the Wendigo.

      • Sootopolis says:

        I really appreciate both of you taking the time to explain that properly; it was so interesting and informative, thank you!

      • GhostCat says:

        We’re almost as educational as a real library!


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