1415: Cute – Oneshot

Title: Cute
Author: WhenDreamsComeToLife
Media: Video Game
Topic: Star Ocean: The Last Hope
Genre: Friendship
URL: Cute
Critiqued by SC

Hello, and welcome back to the Library of the Damned! I’m your host SC, and as you can see, this is a oneshot! This oneshot is simply so that you guys have something to chew on while I finish up the next part of my big riff, because the more there is to write, the slower I go, strangely. I’m by myself this week, because I honestly couldn’t find an OC of mine that fit for this riff.

Monocle: YOU COULD HAVE INVITED MONOCLE!

No, fuck off.

So, what’s the topic of today? Why, it’s Star Ocean! Specifically, the fourth game in the series, Star Ocean: The Last Hope.

Star Ocean: The Last Hope is, as mentioned, the fourth game in the Star Ocean series of fantasy/sci-fi JRPGs (or “action role-playing games,” so sayeth Wikipedia), developed by tri-Ace and published by Square Enix, so you can go ahead and check off “Edgelords,” “Bullshit Weaponry” and “What-The-Fuckery Clothing” from your Square Enix bingo sheets right now. The game was put out for XBox 360 from February through June of 2009, and PS3 in February of 2010.

The story of The Last Hope goes a little bit like this:

Earth, A.D. 2064. Following several clashes between the World Republic Federation, the ruling government body on Earth, and its enemies around the world, World War III has broken out on a nuclear scale. The fallout from the mass deployment of WMDs has driven countries the world over to utter collapse, and the human race is sitting dangerously close to extinction. The surviving population is forced to live in underground cities, as the surface is no longer habitable for them. The world leaders of both warring factions realize that their conflict has left their homeworld in a state where it can no longer sustain life, and so, out of necessity for survival, declare a ceasefire and form the Greater United Nations. In their first act as a new alliance, the GUN form the Universal Science and Technology Administration, or USTA, and charge them with a mission to seek out a suitable new world for humanity to settle upon and begin rebuilding what they foolishly destroyed.

In A.D. 2087, Professor Trillas Bachtein –

O hai, Professor Bachtein!

O hai, Professor Bachtein!

– succeeds in his warp drive experiments, and the first successful faster-than-light warp in a manned vessel is performed by former Federation air force pilot, Stephen D. Kenny.

O hai, Kenny!

O hai, Kenny!

This scientific victory not only earns Kenny the nickname “Lightspeed Kenny” and solidifies his place in history as a hero of humanity, but it also brings about a massive breakthrough in space travel for humankind. With this, the mission to find a new home commences in earnest, with Kenny being appointed commander of the USTA’s secret Space Reconnaissance Force (SRF) lunar base. Ten years after the establishment of the new Stardate calendar (S.D. 0010, or A.D. 2096, going by the old system), Five recon starships – SRF-001 Aquila, SRF-002 Balena, SRF-003 Calnus, SRF-004 Dentdelion, and SRF-005 Eremia – are deployed on the SRF’s maiden mission.

Enter Edge Maverick:

O hai, Edge!

O hai, Edge!

Edge, along with childhood friend Reimi Saionji –

O hai, Reimi!

O hai, Reimi!

– are young crewmen of the Calnus, with their other friend, Crowe F. Almedio –

O hai, Crowe! (HE HAS FUCKING LIGHTSABERS?!)

O hai, Crowe! (HE HAS FUCKING LIGHTSABERS?!)

– having taken the helm as captain of the Aquila. They all joined the SRF to play a part in writing the next chapter of human history. The three friends, along with their respective crewmates and ally ships, set out from the lunar base and enter warp to seek out new planets, but along the way cross paths with an anomaly that knocks the warp trajectory wildly off kilter, crashing four ships including the Calnus on an uncivilized world known as Aeos, and separating the Aquila from the group entirely, to who-knows-where. Captain Grafton, commander of the Calnus, is badly injured in the crash, the surviving crewmen of the Balena and Dentdelion take refuge at the Calnus’ wreck site, and the Eremia is completely unaccounted for, having crashed on the opposite end of the island from the others. Whilst attempting to establish a forward base of operations and clear ship debris out of their way to allow scouting teams access to the jungle that surrounds them, the survivors come under attack by gigantic alien bug creatures, who strangely prove to be impervious to standard bullets, but completely by accident, Edge manages to discover that they’re weak to non-conventional weaponry, after grabbing a high-frequency cutting sword that was previously being used to saw through the ship debris and quite literally slicing the giant bug creatures in half with it. (Don’t ask me why they have high-frequency cutting blades instead of plasma torches. Even the game’s explanation makes no sense.)

After multiple failed attempts to hail the Eremia crew, a rescue mission is conducted, and as Edge and Reimi are the only two capable of fighting the giant bugs (because Reimi just happened to have a bow on her which just happened to be able to hurt giant alien bugs, even though super advanced bullets did nothing – don’t ask, it’s Square Enix logic), it falls to them to undertake the task.

So, blah blah blah, Edge and Reimi find the Eremia, everybody’s dead, an Eldarian dude named Faize shows up –

O hai, Faize Scheifa Beleth!

O hai, Faize Scheifa Beleth!

– some H.P. Lovecraftian abomination appears and starts a boss fight (that it loses), and Faize tells Edge and Reimi that the Calnus is fixed, courtesy of his people, who Earth secretly had a long-standing friendship with that only just now became relevant. Grafton appoints Edge captain because he is too badly injured to return to the helm, and stays back to help oversee the popup base that the Eldarians and human survivors constructed while the rescue operation was underway. Edge, Reimi and Faize set out on the new and improved SRF-003 Calnus-II to continue the SRF’s mission alone, because everybody else’s ships are still undergoing repairs and it’s anybody’s guess what happened to the Aquila.

And the story picks up really fucking fast from there. Thank your lucky stars that I’m not going to go into the rest of it, we’d be here all day.

Now then, this fic, simply named “Cute” by author WhenDreamsComeToLife, is a little one thousand-something-word friendship fic between two characters that you recruit to the Calnus‘ ever-increasingly diverse crew of intergalactic species later on in the game. I’d tell you who they are, but the very first sentence is going to introduce one of them all on its own, so I’ll just get to the riff already.

Arumat lay in bed, doing nothing in particular. He just needed to get away from them, he’d had enough human interaction for one day.

I can relate, sometimes I need alone time too.

And on that note:

O hai, Arumat P. Thanatos!

O hai, Arumat P. Thanatos!

Arumat is a Eldarian, like Faize. Arumat is kind of a standoffish dick, but God help you if you ever decide to piss him off enough to get into a fight. He will RUIN you.

… At least, according to his character bio. I wouldn’t know, personally. I don’t like Arumat, so I never use him in my party. What can I say, I don’t have any interest in asshole characters.

You pick Arumat up about late-midway through the game, after FINALLY reuniting with Crowe back on Aeos, which, itself, happens shortly after learning that wicked creatures known as Phantoms came and utterly wrecked the Eldarian-Human base and killed everyone inside. He replaces Faize on the ship because Faize … has issues and ends up leaving, let’s say. (And no, Crowe does not become a playable character too, sadly. I’d have loved it if he were, but, you know, fuck me.)

Along with the other extraterrestrials as well.

The game is not nearly so politically correct about aliens, let me tell you.

As he sat quietly, the loud sound of the door sliding open interrupted the peace. He closed his eyes, a small sigh escaping his lips. It was probably just Edge. They did decide to share a room after all.

I’d sooner cut my own throat than stick Edge in a room with Arumat.

That’s actually a game mechanic, by the way – the game has a relationship-building system, wherein placing two crew members in the same room slowly builds up their affection towards one another (with the aid of special cutscenes throughout the game, naturally). Depending on which characters you pair up, you unlock a different ending for the game that focuses on that character’s life after the Calnus crew disbands.

Faize’s ending is the absolute biggest bitch out of all of them to unlock, just so you know. I never did it, I just looked up what his ending looked like on YouTube to save myself the trouble.

Being the only two men aboard the ship, excluding Bacchus who had no manly parts to speak of as he was a cyborg.

Excuse me? Yeah, he’s like 90% machine, but Bacchus is still a man by birth, okay? He turned himself into a cyborg, he wasn’t manufactured that way.

And even though Bacchus is NOT the other character of importance in this fic, I’ll at least drop his bio image in for you guys:

O hai, Bacchus D-79!

O hai, Bacchus D-79!

Bacchus, believe it or not, is a scientist. He willingly converted his body to a cyborg chassis in order to better process the kind of thinking needed for doing science stuff. Of course, he ended up following the typical cyborg trend of losing all emotional output and basically becoming a living computer, but hey, cyborgs, yo.

Bacchus is heavy on the use of cannons in combat, and they hurt like shit, so I usually have him as a tank in my party, unless I need to have someone else handy.

“Hmm,” a soft voice went. “Now, where could they be…?”

The Eldarian sat up, not finding the blonde male like he expected. Instead, there was a brown headed female with the whitest of wings. One of the featherfolk if he remembered correctly.

The girl who just wandered in is Sarah Jerand, who you recruit way earlier than Arumat. Sarah IS the other important character in this fi-

Hang on.

Brown hair?

O hai, Sarah Jerand! (Who does not appear to have brown hair, I would like to point out.)

O hai, Sarah Jerand! (Who does not appear to have brown hair, I would like to point out.)

…Author, I’m not sure what your definition of brown is, but it sure ain’t mine.

Er, anyhow, Sarah is a Featherfolk, who, as advertised, are a race of winged beings. Sarah is a pretty klutzy, head-in-the-clouds example, and her voice, admittedly, is on the grating side of the spectrum. (Imagine the most airheaded voice you can, and then up its pitch by about ten. That’s Sarah.) In spite of that, though, she’s my favorite character because I actually LIKE her, which is way more than can be said for most of the rest of the cast. (Yeah, I actually hate most of The Last Hope’s hero roster. I could go into why for each character individually, but that’ll just take up more time than needed. I’ll say this much, though, Square Enix is becoming really good at creating heroes that I end up hating worse than the villains.)

He hmphed.

And in response, SC meh’d.

“What?” He asked, his voice cold.

Somebody get Arumat’s voice a blanket.

“Ah!”

…”My Goddess!”

No?

Oh, okay.

The girl seemed quite surprised.

I’d be pretty shocked if I got bitched at the second I entered a room, too. Actually, no I wouldn’t, there’s always someone going on a bitch-fest in the Specs and Co., it’s just a matter of who it is when I enter the room.

“I-Is that you, Mr. Arumat?” She questioned, though not at him.

Sarah, I know you’re a ditz, but surely you recall the boarding arrangements on the ship? If it ain’t Arumat, the only other option could be Edge, and since he’s not present, I can only assume the author has him piloting right now. (Which, by the time you recruit Sarah, is rendered completely unnecessary by an Eldarian tech upgrade that allows the Calnus-II to autopilot itself through warp jumps, so I don’t know why he’d be bothering.)

She was staring at the wall in front of her with close intensity when Arumat sat behind her.

…Uh, Sarah might be a goofus, but she’s not fucked in the directional hearing area, author. What are you-

Finally, the girl bent to far forward and fell onto the bed. Edge’s bed.

“Oh dear!” She cried. “They must not be here either.”

Arumat stayed silent, wondering if the girl would just leave.

She sat up from the bed, a small sigh of exasperation.

“Mr. Arumat, are you still there?” The girl called out. “If you are, do you think you can assist me in finding my glasses?

Oooooooh, that’s why. I can’t claim to know how fucking blind Sarah is, so I guess I can let this slide.

Merecle was toying with them and it seems as though she lost them.”

O hai, Meracle Chamlotte!

O hai, Meracle Chamlotte!

Meracle is a Fellpool, who actually have a long-standing presence in the Star Ocean series (actually, all the races in Last Hope are long-timers, now that I think of it). Specifically, she’s a Lesser Fellpool, who I guess have the more prominent cat-like features than the Greater Fellpool? Don’t quote me on that. Ert will at least be happy to know that, unlike the catgirl sniper from EP’s laughable and excruciatingly thin-to-not-even-remotely-veiled 40K harem rape fic, Meracle is not a sniper (she fights with battle claws), and does not exist for no other reason but sex, although she does follow just about every catgirl stereotype EP put in his gross fic, I’m afraid.

Meracle is my other favorite character, because she’s just so cheerful all the time forever, which is another stark contrast to most of the rest of the crew, who all have emo moments at different points in the game. You recruit her from a secret military base when some space bullfuckery happens and the Calnus-II ends up in an alternate dimension where Earth is still fighting through the Cold War. That’s pretty much the only sad part of the game for Meracle, because her only friend there is counted among the dead when the Alternate Reality Earth is destroyed by a nuclear apocalypse brought on by the scheming of a madwoman. Outside of that, Meracle is just a bundle of goofy fun, always, which is a blessing in a game that tries too hard to be edgy, IN SPAAAAAAAAACE.

If the feline-like creature lost them, shouldn’t it have been her job to find them?

Yes, but Arumat, it’s Meracle. She steals cookies while someone else is eating them, why would she find Sarah’s glasses after losing them?

The girl titled her head as a waiting gesture. Occasionally, squinting her eyes to see if it would make her sight any better.

Trust me, Sarah, that does nothing.

Other than that, her blue eyes stayed clear. Always corresponding with the smile on her face as though there was no type of danger in the world at all. If she even had that much sense. Maybe she thought that there was no danger in the universe.

You act like being an optimist is a bad thing.

Arumat sighed. Is this really the strong team Edge wanted to show him?

If it were me playing, they’d be a hell of a lot stronger than you, for sure.

(Because I haaaaate you)

“I-I guess he left…” The girl sighed. “I better try to find them on my own.”

She got up and made her way to the door. She exited, but not before bumping into the wall next to it with a small ‘Oh dear!’. The door didn’t even get to fully close when he saw her trip over her own feet. The Eldarian sighed.

God damn it, Arumat, the least you could do is help poor Sarah, she’s having a terrible day!

Was there no one else to help her? This seemed to be a task for the member of their crew that came before Arumat.

Oh, quit bitching and get off your ass!

Arumat got off the bed, still refusing to help the girl as he passed her silently in the hallway and made his way through the Calnus.

THIS IS WHY I HATE YOU!

Going through the corridor that had a flight of stairs leading downwards. On the table in the middle of the recreation room was a pair of glasses. Arumat went to go pick them up, inspecting them.

“Aren’t those Serrie’s?”

He turned around to find the small, little girl that traveled with Edge’s team.

*WOOP-WOOP! That’s the sound of DRD!*

Shit.

*DRD agents kick in the door*

Hey, Living Stone! I found the fuckers who stole your pie!

*DRD agents put the door back up and flee in terror*

*That was uncalled for.*

Hey, you started it.

So, the fic isn’t going to name her, but the little girl is Lymle. But everybody calls her Lym.

O hai, Lymle Lemuri Phi! (But everybody calls her Lym, remember.)

O hai, Lymle Lemuri Phi! (But everybody calls her Lym, remember.)

And actually, Lym is a full-grown adult who did some weird shit with magic (sorry, “Symbology”) that permanently locked her in a kid’s body. Oh, and she has a pet hellhound. He’s a cool dude.

You pick up Lym way early on in the game. In fact, she’s on the first planet you visit after Edge takes command of the Calnus-II. She has a funny habit of assigning nicknames to people immediately upon meeting them (except Faize, she fucking hates Faize), and also suffixing just about everything she says with “Kay?” In general, I don’t dislike Lym, but … well, she’s kinda creepy. She speaks in a dead monotone, and despite the game constantly clarifying that she’s actually an adult, she seems plenty content to behave like a five-year-old. I dunno, it just weirds me out.

She’s never not in my party, though. She’s my ace Black Mage, yo, I need her. Mainly for hiding behind, because I choose to play as Reimi, which means I’m always fighting at range and therefore have no defense. My poor HP bar can’t handle that stress.

She took to calling the Eldarian Matty, or something of that nature.

Yeah, that sounds about right. Lym’s nicknaming scheme usually tends to go, [part of person’s name] + [-y or -ie]. Edge is Edgie, Reimi is Rei-Rei, Faize is Fuck Off And Die, Bacchus is Bacchy, Meracle is Merry, Sarah is Sarrie, Myuria (who makes no appearance in this fic) is … I honestly don’t know, and Arumat would have to be Matty because it just makes sense.

She also seemed to want the crew member that Arumat temporarily replaced back.

Strange, because all she does is hate the air that Faize breathes. Well, unless you do the comedy thing and stick them in a room together, then they begin to grudgingly get along.

“You should get those back to her ASAP, kay?” The girl questioned. “She’s probably looking for them. You’re friends and friends should help each other, kay?”

*Arumat* “The fuck is a friend? What am I supposed to do with those?”

With that, she turned and skipped off about her business. Just as she did, the featherfolk miraculously made her way to the recreation room, looking just about as confused and lost when Arumat first saw her.

Somebody PLEASE help Sarah, for shit’s sake! She’s actually dying, here!

He stepped towards her, raising her hand, palm up with his, and placing the glasses within it.

“Ah, thank you!” She said, putting them on and bowing. “Oh, how I can’t thank you enough! It’s rather uncomfortable to get around without them. I was just about to give up.”

No, that would have only made things hysterically worse, Sarah.

“I simply passed by them. You have no need to thank me.” Arumat said, his tone not as friendly as it could have been.

But how could it? He’d seen his comrades, his friends, all die before him. He’d always been the only survivor.

And here the fic was doing so well not bringing any of the game’s tryhard edginess into anything.

“There is a reason to thank you.” The featherfolk said. “If you were simply passing them by, you wouldn’t have given them to me, right? That’s why I’m thanking you now.”

She gave a slight bow, her hands clasped gently against her chest before looking up. Her blue eyes met with his golden ones. For some reason, he couldn’t help but see her as what some call…cute.

Title drop!

*SC dings a bell on his desk*

“How can I repay you?”

“There’s no need.” Arumat said, wandering to a different part of the Calnus. “There is nothing to repay me for, Featherfolk.”

“Please, just call me Sarah. And I do have a need to repay you.”

She followed after him. Sarah was quite the persistent one. (As we’ve seen since she ended up on their ship in such an funny way.)

NO AUTHOR’S COMMENTARY MID-NARRATIVE!

*BKAM!*

*Grey pokes his head in*

Grey: I heard a gunshot. Who died?

My computer screen, mostly.

Grey: Oh. I thought it was something interesting. Nevermind, bye.

“That’s an odd duo I didn’t expect to see.” Edge commented to Reimi as the two watched Arumat and Sarah wander around the ship.

You two fuckers were there the entire time, and neither of you could be fucking bothered to help Sarah find her glasses?!

Sarah had her usual smile, probably spewing nonsense, trying to wrap her mind around whatever modernized news or information Arumat had actually decided to tell her. Arumat himself would nod, giving blunt and short answers when needed.

A brief overview of two personalities, as written by WhenDreamsComeToLife.

“It’s weird…” Edge said.

“Don’t be like that!” Reimi scolded, hitting him harshly on the shoulder. “I think it’s cute! I wish I could be like that with a ‘certain someone’.”

Subtle, Reimi.

It’s not like it’s hard to figure out who she means, she barely hides her romantic interest in Edge, and the game is all but determined to see you unlock her ending first.

Whatever Reimi was hinting at, Edge completely didn’t get. He was too busy rubbing his sore arm and watching the odd duo. Just what did Reimi see that he didn’t? And GEEZ she hit hard….

Oh, walk it off and get over it, you baby.

-END-

Now what kind of horrible monster would roast a poor END on a spit like that?

I’m sorry, don’t kill me.

DENIED!

*BKAM!*

I just think it’s cute…..Sorry if OOC. I tried…

Meh, it actually wasn’t all that bad, to be perfectly honest. A few goofed up character details, but those are pretty minor.

Hey, I didn’t say I’d be riffing a oneshot of a fic as bad as my current riff, alright? I did warn you this was just filler, didn’t I?

Anyhow, thanks for reading, folks, and stay tuned for next time! Back to chapter twelve next week, so … you know … yay. In the meantime, I’m SC, and I’ll see you next time!

… Well, that went relatively well. It’s a bit quiet though, whenever it’s just me doing this. Meh, at least I didn’t have to deal with-

Monocle: MONOCLE COULD HAVE PROVIDED NOISE FOR YOU!

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!


17 Comments on “1415: Cute – Oneshot”

  1. batjamags says:

    Enter Edge Maverick:

    Ladies and gentlemen, the game so edgy that its main character is named Edge Maverick.

    EDGE. MAVERICK.

    It’s a wonder he doesn’t chop his own arm off with all that edge he’s got going on. He’s using a sword in the 21st century and his weird-ass costume is asymmetrical and everything! Dude’s got enough edge to shave a hundred manly bearded guys. While chopping down a forest. And slicing through three feet of steel. He’s got so much edge he’s downright mono-molecular.

    So edgy.

    • SC says:

      Pretty sure SD 0010 is a bit further along than the 21st century, but hey, no complaints.

      And if you want to know exactly how edgy (snerk) Edge (pfft!) is, he spends like half the game bitching about an apocalypse he didn’t actually cause (he unwittingly played a hand in it, sure, but someone else pulled the trigger), which had no negative impact on the present time, and there were much more pressing matters to worry about that he was ignoring, so Reimi temporarily unseated him as captain because shit needed to get done, yo.

      That’s how edgy Edge is.

  2. batjamags says:

    She got up and made her way to the door. She exited, but not before bumping into the wall next to it with a small ‘Oh dear!’. The door didn’t even get to fully close when he saw her trip over her own feet. The Eldarian sighed.

    The plot of this fic in a nutshell:

  3. batjamags says:

    OK, see, Crowe is an excellent example of how you make a character not look like they lost a fight with a junkyard.

    This is coming from the guy who thinks superheroes look better with their underwear outside their pants, so take my criticisms of JRPG clothing with a grain of salt.

    • SC says:

      No no, you’re right on the money. Crowe is somehow the least Square Enix-looking character Square Enix has ever claimed responsibility of.

  4. TacoMagic says:

    The girl titled her head as a waiting gesture. Occasionally, squinting her eyes to see if it would make her sight any better.

    Trust me, Sarah, that does nothing.

    Weird little fact I picked up on that: squinting actually does help, just not enough to matter if your eyesight is bad enough. It works due to a strange optical property called pinhole focusing. Specifically, the more restricted the angle of entry of light, the larger your depth of focus is. Squinting does this in a rather inefficient way since it only columates light on the vertical plane, but it does slightly increase your focus.

    Basically the physics are the same behind why pinhole glasses work.

    • SC says:

      Huh, so that’s what it is. I had been wondering.

      But safe to say, Sarah will benefit not at all from pinhole focusing.

      • TacoMagic says:

        Not much. The effect is still there, but it’d change her focal distance from a few inches to maybe a foot.

      • SC says:

        If that. The fic is implying that she can’t even see one inch in front of her, which is basically legally blind.

  5. TacoMagic says:

    You act like being an optimist is a bad thing.

    Depends on how well you handle disappointment. An optimist who is also carefree enough to deal with shit that goes wrong is a great thing. Those who are optimistic but don’t deal well with disappointments tend to spent a great deal of their life unhappy. I’ve known a few of the latter and they universally struggled with bouts of depression.

    • SC says:

      Thankfully, that ain’t me.

      Not Sarah, either, she’s too busy learning how treadmills work and drinking tea and such to be bothered by the shit that goes down in-game.

  6. "Lyle" says:

    you can go ahead and check off “Edgelords,” “Bullshit Weaponry” and “What-The-Fuckery Clothing” from your Square Enix bingo sheets right now.

    All I need is “Tragic, unforeseen slow-motion death of important character.” C’moooooon…. *hovers bright pink dauber over her sheet*

    • SC says:

      As far as I know (my damn XBox broke before I could finish the game), that doesn’t happen.

      However, early into the game when Edge is fighting the bug things for the first time, there is a slow-mo dramatic sword swing in which a HIDDEN POWER is briefly revealed in the form of an OMINOUS, GLOWING MARK on the back of Edge’s hand.

  7. SC says:

    *SC reads through his opening infodump*

    Holy crap, could I have weaseled “world” into that first paragraph a few dozen more times? The audience might have missed the couple dozen other instances.

  8. "Lyle" says:

    Monocle: MONOCLE COULD HAVE PROVIDED NOISE FOR YOU!

    He will forever remain my favorite.

    • SC says:

      He is, by far, the easiest Specs and Co. character to write.

      JUST BE FOREVER SCREAMING AND TALK LIKE SOME KIND OF HONOR-BOUND WARRIOR, THROW VIOLENCE INTO THE WORKS, AND THERE YOU GO.