1325: My Little Unicorn: Magic is Believing (That still means nothing) Chapter 7

Title: My Little Unicorn:  Magic Is Believing
Author: Dakari-King Mykan
Media: Cartoon
Topic: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Genre: Adventure/Romance
URL: Chapter 7
Critiqued by Erttheking

Ert: Remember how the last chapter had some big reveals about Krysta and Lightning? Well the author didn’t. You’ll have to excuse me though, I’m working on a little side project. You know how certain shows have trends and cliches unique to them? Well I’m trying to map them out here. Shepard, you’re in charge.

Shepard: What really? You sure?

Ert: Just do it.

Cornelia: Lead the way.

Shepard: Should I swear a lot to fill his shoes?

Nora: Heh, I think we’re good.

Ert: Eat me.

Magic and Mirrors

Shepard: You know Herr pointed out in his Kamen Rider/Person review how interesting mirror-based horrors can be. But it’s not even a contest to guess that Mykan will fail to realize that.

Lightning and Krysta had gone to Cookie dough’s for breakfast, as it was flapjack day, and Cookie Dough made the best flapjacks there were.

Cornelia: Is that something to be proud of here? He seems to be the only cook in existence. Just like everyone else is the only person that does their respective job.

Lightning ordered a big stack for himself and Krysta, heavy on the syrup.

Nora: Don’t try and be George R.R. Martin. He’s a brilliant author, you’re not. And even then I want to scream “Thank you Martin but I don’t CARE that Brienne is eating blood sausages with ale. AND WHY IS SHE STILL LOOKING FOR SANSA!?”

After just one bite of those warm fluffy flapjacks, Lightning and Krysta, as well as the other customers all felt lighter than are and warm inside.

Shepard: Lighter than are? Goeth? Help?

Goeth: I punched in the variables to try and figure out what “are” was and what its weight and density is. My computer is now flipping me off. I should’ve known giving it that arm was a bad idea. *Rip*

“Every time…” Cookie Dough chuckled “How do I do it?”

Cornelia: Praising another character is endearing when done right, but praising yourself is very hard to do without making your character come off as arrogant. The best way would be to have them be excited and gushing, not idly patting themselves on the back.

As everyone ate through breakfast, Abra Kadabra entered the restaurant, much to everyone’s astonish. “Abra Kadabra, yes!” he chuckled. A few of the customers asked for his autograph, which he was only too obliged to give.

Shepard: Obliged means required to, legally or otherwise. That word really doesn’t fit here.

He passed by Lightning and Krysta. “What’s a big-shot like you doing here?” asked Lightning.

Nora: Big shot? Lightning, he showed up at your welcoming party. If anyone at that party was a big shot at some point, they revoked that title when they stepped into the room you were in.

Abra felt that was a silly question, “Why…because I’m hungry, even a magician needs to eat.”

Nora: Well that totally answered my question and didn’t ignore the fact that Lightning was clearly wondering why someone of this guy’s “status” was at this restaurant.

He found a table opposite form Lightning and Krysta’s but Cookie Dough informed him that the table hadn’t been set yet.

Cornelia: Either the plates are brought out with the food and this isn’t a problem, or they’re not and Cookie Dough is slacking.

“I see…” said Abra “Well… I think I can take care of that.” He put down his bag and clapped his front hooves together, which captured everyone’s attention.

Nora: Cookie Dough is slacking so that Abra can show off. Goodie.

Everyone watched as Abra began to perform tricks and the slight of hove… pulling a tablecloth out from his hat which everyone saw was completely empty.

Shepard: Well it wasn’t really empty seeing as tablecloths don’t “hold” things unless they’re fashioned into makeshift sacks, but now I’m just nitpicking.

Nora:  Deservedly so I would argue.

He waved his cape over the table making a dish appear. He held out one of his hooves, and then he waved his other hove across it, making eating utensils appear. Finally, he made it seem as if he had pulled a napkin form his mouth, and then placing it flat on the table, he lifted it up revealing a flower in a pot of water.

Cornelia: And now I’m questioning if that water is his saliva. Also, unless it turns out that Abra is an illusionist like most magicians, and we know he isn’t, he just created life from nothing.

Goeth: And I’ve been trying to get that down for years! I know science says its impossible, but the point of science is that it’s constantly evolving and we need to push beyond the boundaries to find out where they actually are. Now LIVE! LIVE TOASTER!

Everyone applauded, and Abra took a bow. Cookie Dough brought him a serving of flapjacks and promised him it would be on the house for such a performance. “Well, I was hoping you would.” said Abra “I don’t have any money to give you in any case.”

Nora: This seems like a rather asinine way to get food. No scratch that, it IS an asinine way to get food. What were you going to do if Cookie Dough actually set the table?

Cornelia:  Dine and dash?

“What…?” snapped Cookie Dough.

Lightning and Krysta were just as shocked.

Shepard: Their opinion added nothing, moving on.

Abra explained that he had fallen on hard times since Titan had returned, and he had a hard time finding work. All the parties he had ever been invited to perform at were always spoiled by an attack on the kingdom, forcing everyone to evacuate. He didn’t do a show, so he didn’t get paid.

Cornelia: Maybe the entire Kingdom shouldn’t go into lockdown if one isolated town is attacked. What’s more, Titan and his minions have struck four times, but only two of them actually sent out an alarm. If he’s on hard times because he missed two parties then he was most likely already borderline destitute.

Even at his own performances in the streets, people threw him flowers more than they threw him money, and those who wanted Abra’s autograph, he just didn’t have the heart to ask for money. That was his problem; Abra was as kind and merciful as The Grand Ruler.

Shepard: He seems to be on a similar brainwave too. Is asking for pocket change something that he just can’t do?

“Well, can’t use just use your magic and make yourself more money?” asked Krysta

“Uh… Krysta… I don’t think it works that way.” said Lightning.

“Indeed, it doesn’t.” sighed Abra as he picked at his breakfast.

Nora: That’s all the explanation one get. “It doesn’t work that way.” Not that it’d be illegal or anything to that effect, it just “doesn’t work that way.” The guy that spontaneously generated life can’t make a few counterfeit coins. In other words “we need his out-of-nowhere poverty to advance the plot.”

Ert:  There’s a trope for that!

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/CompressedVice

His real magic as a unicorn was for quick wits, and smarts. Not battle or conjuring. “Oh! What am I going to do?” he wondered aloud.

Cornelia: Wits and smarts didn’t play into the trick he just did at all, that was conjuring to the core.

The only thing anyone could figure was perhaps for Abra to get a second job. “Say, Cookie Dough. Weren’t you looking for help in the kitchen?”

Shepard: How do you know that…whoever just said that?

Cookie Dough caught on and agreed to let Abra have a try. “Oh, I don’t wish to be a bother.” said Abra.

Nora: Be a bother? It’s a job. You do work and you get paid, it’s a give and take relationship. Honestly, with the way Abra keeps acting, I’m starting to think he likes being poor.

Shepard:  Oh…oh dear Mykan, what are you doing?

“Not at all…” replied Cookie Dough “I’d be happy to give you a chance.”

Abra smiled.

Shepard: At least the scene ended without someone laughing.

Titan was very, very busy working on a special project, and charged his minions with gathering more energy, or capturing Lightning, and the minions were all arguing over who should go.

Nora: Novel concept. ALL of you go. It’s not like you need two people to stay behind on guard duty or anything. If you’re not out on a direct mission you’re essentially sitting around with your thumbs up your asses.

Ultimately they were forced to draw straws, and Dementia won. “I’m not only beautiful, I’m just lucky.” she teased.

Cornelia: Lucky? Name one time in this story you were lucky aside from this instance.

The others were not amused. “Whatever your plan is… just make sure it actually works.” snapped Rep-Stallion.

Shepard: Apparently to get energy for Titan all she needs is a hose and a bucket. Remember, water is apparently enough.

“Hah!” remarked Dementia “At least I won’t screw up this time, unlike the two of you.”

Nora: This really is the only way these guys interact, by insulting each other. With zero creativity and self-awareness I might add.

Mysteriously simply scoffed, “If memory serves me correctly, I actually succeeded in please Titan while the two of you returned empty handed.”

Cornelia: Yes but your method of doing so was jaw droppingly forced, so don’t start bragging yet.

Dementia growled angrily, causing her to sweat and ruin her makeup, making her even angrier, but she didn’t have time to worry of that now. “I have a plan that’s really going to reflect upon the both of you.” She hissed as she gazed into her mirror. “Hee, hee, hee…!”

Nora: That wasn’t even a pun. A pun is a play on words, sounds like something even tough it really means something else. Not just shoving random words into sentences.

Cornelia:  How is messing up puns even possible!  They’re so easy to do that half of the comedy around them is just reacting to bad ones.

Abra was soon put to work, washing the dishes, only he wasn’t very good at it, and dropped a couple of dishes. “Oh, dear!” he groaned.

Shepard: *Sigh* What? He wasn’t very good at washing dishes and dropped a couple? That’s not being bad at a job, that’s being unable to preform basic household chores. Is this episode going to try and show that Abra is simply unable to do anything outside of his normal job? Even the most basic of tasks?

Lightning and Krysta offered to stay and help, as their job of the day as town helpers.

Nora: This job of theirs really is just “Go wherever the plot needs you.”

Shepard: I’m not really sure what else they’d do.  This town doesn’t seem to have an economy outside of Cookie Dough’s restaurant.

The way Abra worked, you’d think he’d never washed dishes in his life, which was true because Abra usually ate with paper plates and plastic utensils that you threw away or recycled once you were finished with them,

Cornelia: All of the time? No cups that you keep around, no pots or pans that you use to cook with, no jugs that you keep water in? Everything is disposable? You’re right, Shepard. Abra basically can’t function outside of his magician job if this is anything to go by.

that and he was too busy working on his magic acts to really have too much time for simple chores most of the time.

Nora: Is he really spending 16 hours of the day preparing for these acts? It seems like his trick with setting the table was rather spur of the moment. This whole conflict seems really contrived, more contrived than usual that is.

“If only I had spent equal time learning how to do other things, I wouldn’t be in such a mess.”

Cornelia: Equal time? Try any time at all. Cleaning dishes is painfully simple. Honestly I still don’t know how you dropped some earlier, you just don’t let go of them.

Abra said. “Don’t say that…!” said Krysta “You’re a great magician, Abra, and make people happy and astonished with your talent.”

Ert: Yeah and I’m a writer that make people happy with my talent. I CAN STILL DO THE FUCKING DISHES!

Cookie Dough and Lightning agreed. “Everyone has their own special skill…” said Cookie Dough “Like me with my cooking.”

Nora: Yes, everyone has their own special skill, but being able to do basic things like cleaning are things everyone can (AND SHOULD) do.

“Abra, you’re lucky…” added Lightning “At least you can do all these things, I can’t even perform one simple card trick, let alone do actual magic other than the uniforce and my Rainbow Rod.”

Cornelia: How does this connect with his inability to hold down a job?

Abra felt flattered, but this still didn’t help him with his money problem.

Shepard: Exactly what Cornelia said.

“If only there some way I could really bring my act up. Get better performances. All I’d need is full house of observers.”

Shepard: No, that’s not what you said. You said your performances kept getting interrupted by Titan’s attacks, not that you weren’t popular enough. The quality of your show has nothing to do with it. You could get the biggest show in the world and it wouldn’t make a difference if Titan attacked during the middle of it. (Apparently. I guess Abra can’t ask for payments in advance. Does he not believe in rain checks?)

Cookie dough wished he could help, but he really just couldn’t think of anything. “Excuse me… I have a full house of unicorns to feed.” He said as he went back out to serve his guests.

Cornelia: Anyone else notice that Cookie Dough has yet to do anything of substance in this story? I mean even Rhymey, annoying as he is, is around when the big monster shows up. Cookie Dough is just kinda there.

That’s when Lightning and Krysta realized the full house, and remembering that Cookie Dough’s place was one of the most famous in the entire kingdom. That’s when they both happened upon the very same idea, but decided not to tell Abra yet. They planned to save it as a surprise.

Nora: So they forgot that Cookie Dough was famous (probably because they have the memories of goldfish) only remembered he was famous because he had a full house (because only famous restaurants ever have full houses) and this somehow gave them an idea.  That is never commented on again in the chapter, spoiler alert.

As the day continued, Abra was starting to get the hang of washing dishes. He didn’t even mind that he had dishpan hooves. He even amazed the staff with some of his magic tricks to store the dishes and utensils away.

Shepard: See? Washing dishes isn’t very hard. It hasn’t even been a day and he’s already getting the hang of it. What was the point of making Abra too incompetent to scrub a plate without dropping it, earlier?

They were all very impressed. Abra took a bow and said to Lightning and Krysta, “I’m starting to like it here. Maybe I should work here more often.”

Lightning and Krysta just giggled at one another cheekily.

Cornelia: I’m sorry, what was the joke here? People laugh at things they find funny, what was the punchline? Oh right I forgot, these characters come down with giggling fits fairly often for reasons I can’t comprehend.

Suddenly, everyone in the place began to scream followed by the clattering of dishes. Lightning and Krysta immediately ran out to see, “Dementia…!”

Nora: Suddenly!

Dementia turned to face them and then she dashed out the door as the alarms sounded and everyone began to run back inside before the force fields activated. “After her…!” shouted Lightning as they zoomed past the crowds and out the door. Abra saw them run and felt that this was most serious, and he also had a sudden sneaky plan in mind.

Shepard: I don’t see why they always run after Titan’s minions. I mean they haven’t exactly been ordered to. Shouldn’t they be taking cover inside the force fields along with everyone else? See this is why the Grand Ruler is actually a lousy king, because he put up all of these sentries and barriers but despite that he never formulated a plan to actually respond to the threats and just assumed that Lightning would always take care of it. Lazy.

Poor Cookie Dough though, his restaurant was a mess. He took off his chef hat, “When did I start losing control… in my joint?” he cried.

Cornelia: Did he ever have any control over anything?

Nora & Shepard:  Not over a damn thing.

Lightning and Krysta searched round the empty square just as the shields came up, and then they spotted Dementia standing in at the other end of the square. “My, but it’s a lovely day for a battle.” she mocked “Only this time you lose.”

Cornelia: Mocked? Who is she mocking, the day? Is she sarcastically saying that it’s a lovely day? What did the day do to you lady?

Lightning and Krysta were already annoyed. “We’re tired of these games, Dementia.” snapped Lightning “Why don’t you do us all a favor and go back to Titan, and stay there?”

Nora: Oh ok, I’ll go do that now, because you asked so nicely.

Dementia simply laughed, “I think I’ll stay around here for a while, and with a little company as well.” she said as she held out her mirror.

“What are you up to?” Krysta demanded to know. She got her answer when Dementia sprinkled the magic dust in her pouches all over her mirror transforming it into a monster with mirrors for arms, mirrors for legs, even two large mirrors for its body and its head.

Shepard: So how does this work? Is it basically a bunch of mirrors duct tapped together? I don’t feel like this’d be really hard to deal with, the narration didn’t point out anything special about these mirrors, so this monster sounds like it’s only a few inches thick.

“As if she didn’t have enough of those already.” growled Krysta.

Dementia was pleased with her new monster, mostly but the fact that she could see herself from so many different angles, but that wasn’t the best part. “Go get them, Reflect-Shot.”

Cornelia: No. No she can not. Unless this monster is a twisted monstrosity of jagged mirror shards, that is, and it sounds more like a standard two arms, two legs, a torso and a head deal. All of the mirrors would basically give her the same angle.  Also a monster that reflects everything.  It’s been done.

(Unoriginality Counter: 9)

The monster began obeyed and began to move forward. “Let’s see what this this thing can do.” Growled Lighting as he charged forward,

Nora: Because this ALWAYS works out for you. You little dumbass.

Cornelia:  How has his head not swollen up to the size of a watermelon by this point?

heading straight for the center mirror, which was the monster’s body, and rammed into it, only get horribly knocked back. “OOF…!” Lighting felt is he had just been hit by another unicorn. “What was that…?” he wondered aloud. Krysta was confused too.

Nora: Ok seriously, you have no right to be confused. It’s called reflect-shot. Rub the two brain cells that you have together and figure out the bleedingly obvious.

Dementia sniggered softly at their feeble attempts.

Lightning got up, and tried again. This time he did a bucking kick with his hind legs, but felt something boot him back hard! “Whoa…! Hey…!”

Shepard: I am honestly starting to think that Lightning is suffering from a rather severe form of brain damage. That’s the only way he could be this dense.

Krysta saw the whole thing and began to wonder what was going on. The monster hadn’t even raised an arm yet Lightning had defiantly been attacked by something, and she also noticed Dementia was by herself with glee. “Wait a minute…!” Krysta said, and flew in closer to check out the monster as it continued to stomp its way forward.

Cornelia: This is honestly painful to read. It should not take anyone this long to figure out something that’s this painfully obvious. What is Mykan trying to say here? That all of this characters need to have things spelled out for them?

Nora:  Would you be surprised if he was?

Krysta flew at the Reflect-Shot’s face, until she was just inches away from the glass that was reflecting her. She then reached out with her hand to touch the glass, but strangely, it felt as if she was touching her own hand. “What the…?”

Then, she tried something drastic, and gently slapped her reflection in the cheek, only to feel the actual slap herself. “Nya, ha, ha, ha… Haven’t you figured out yet?” Dementia laughed.

Nora: They should have. The monster’s NAME gives it all away! But no, I guess it’s freaking rocket science. Also on a side note, Dementia how did you know that this monster would have these properties? Did you test what the powder would do to mirrors before you left? Or did you just assume that a mirror monster would reflect attacks when hit aand not just shatter into a thousand pieces?

Her monster was a giant mirror, if the reflection of anything or anyone was hit on its very special surface, the real thing would suffer the attack. In other words, you’d only be attacking yourself instead of the monster. Lightning and Krysta felt they were in big trouble,

Shepard: I honestly feel insulted that the story thought that it needed to spell that our for us. It’s like a monster that’s defeated by stepping out of the way when it charges you, it’s not very original.

Cornelia:  I guess it beats them struggling to figure out that water would beat a fire monster.  Barely.

“But that’s only half your worries.” said Dementia “Let us demonstrate its other unique ability.”

At her command, Reflect-Shot raised its mirror arms up, up, up… and began to reflect the sunlight into powerful beams to fire at Lightning and Krysta.

Nora: Uh. No. That’s not how it works. This thing is made out of mirrors. It’s not focusing the sun’s rays, its not magnifying them, its just reflecting them. Worst case scenario, the sun would get in someone’s eyes. NO! ANYTHING BUT THAT!

“Watch out…!” cried Lighting as they evaded the beams. Lightning’s tail caught little graze “WHOA…! That’s hot!” he shouted.

Dementia was overjoyed, and really believed her victory was assured. “Why not make it easy and surrender?” she said “I promise I’ll be gentle.”

Cornelia: Titan’s villains are really uncommitted to their job, when you think about it. They basically ask Lightning to give up the second they start expending a little bit of effort, like they just don’t want to have to do any work but still want to accomplish their objective.

“Never!” shouted Lightning.

“We’ll never give in.” added Krysta.

Shepard: Did Krysta forget that Lightning surrendered himself to Titan last chapter? And that he only got saved because a pair of walking, talking stereotypes came out of nowhere?

“Ugh! Fine…! We’ll do it the hard way.” groaned Dementia, and she ordered her monster to capture them both.

Nora: Why? What do you need the fairy for?

Lightning and Krysta didn’t know what to do. They couldn’t even try to attack the monster while it could reflect everything. The glass was also super strong and couldn’t be broken as easily by simple attacks.

Cornelia: How do you know that? You haven’t even really hit it yet because all of your attacks were reflected.

Lightning didn’t dare use the Rainbow Rod, and sure wished one of his other friends was there now to help him.

Shepard: He doesn’t dare use the Rainbow Rod? Why? Does he need to make it so that the plot doesn’t end too early?

“Ha, ha, ha…! Too bad, fools!” Dementia sniggered, but then someone called out to her, “Hold it right there!”

“Huh…?”

Nora: It’s moments like this where I just can’t help but imagine that all of the characters spend most of their time with their jaws slack. Everything they do just feels so slow, like their brains are only operating at half speed.

Shepard:  I think you want to aim a little lower on that estimate.

The monster looked round too. Lightning and Krysta stared from round the monster and could see Abra was standing there, wearing his hat, cape, and holding his wand. “Abra… what are you doing?” called Lightning.

“Get out of here!” added Krysta.

Nora: Don’t stupidly charge in and futilely fight an enemy you have no realistic way of beating! That’s our job!

Dementia actually agreed, “Indeed you would be wise to leave.” she snapped “I have no use for you. It’s Lightning that I want. Leave here now before I order my monster to destroy you!”

Cornelia: That’s an empty bluff. You don’t need the fairy and you gave a “capture” order for her. Let’s be honest, the worst these monsters can do is knock someone back with a mild amount of pain. Mykan doesn’t have the guts to seriously hurt his characters.

Abra wouldn’t run. He had seen everything and was willing to help Krysta and Lightning out, not to mention get a little even with Titan and his minions for wrecking his gigs and forcing him out of cash. “You have interfered long enough.” He growled.

Nora: How dare you get in the way of my money! (Also how dare you attack my friends or something.)

Cornelia:  *Snort* Wow Abra’s priories are messed up.

Dementia had taken enough of this and ordered Reflect-Shot to attack. Abra just stood where he was as the monster reflected the sunlight. “Abra…!”

“Get out of there…!”

Shepard: Whoever just said that, why are you even bothering? Every time Lignthing is in trouble his friends always bail him out with something they pull out of thin air. You should be prematurely thanking him.

Abra still didn’t move as the beams hit him. Dementia laughed hard in triumph, but when the dust had cleared. “What…?” Abra was nowhere to be seen, not even any ashes, except that of what was left on the pavement where the beams had hit.

Lightning and Krysta were confused too.

Cornelia: These two don’t understand anything about anything in this kingdom do they? I mean what is so baffling about Abra pulling a disappearing act? That’s magician 101.

“Over here…” Abra called a she waved from another section of the street.

Shepard: Gah! When did Abra become a woman!?

“Get him!” shouted Dementia and her monster fired again, but again, Abra eluded them with another one of his tricks, and when he showed himself again “Remember the first rules of the magic arts: Things aren’t what they seem.”

Cornelia: That only works with real-life illusions. In a place like this, the magic is very real. So “Things aren’t what they seem” makes no sense and is an example of Mykan trying to be witty and failing.

Dementia growled fiercely, and then leapt down to attack Abra herself with her monster as back up. “Okay! I tried to be peaceful,

Nora: *Looks back* I don’t think you and I have the same definition of peaceful.

but you like all others, wish to do it the hard way.” She used her magic to warp the field around Abra, enclosing him and bind of waving energy,

Cornelia: She did what with the who now?

but Abra didn’t even seem stunned. “Huh!” he remarked “Very amateurish…” and he stomped his hove and like magic, he was freed while Dementia was being held up by her own spell. “What… how did you!”

Shepard: You know, when you introduce magic or some other sort of supernatural power into a story, it’s important to establish what you can or cannot do. Otherwise when people do random things with it, it comes more as “It’s magic, I don’t have to explain it,” instead of “He has certain abilities that allow him to do this within the context of this world.”

The monster however was right behind him, and already laid its two huge mirror arms to the sides of Abra ready to close in and squash him! “Oh I can’t look!” cried Krysta as she hid under Lightning’s wing, but Lighting began to notice something else. The monster had no reflective surface on its backside.

Cornelia:…What? The backside of this thing, a good 50% of its surface area (It’s flat after all) is completely vulnerable? And no one noticed this until now? And this was supposed to be a threat. Mykan. You really thought this was a good idea?

“I wonder…” he thought.

“Any last words…?” Dementia sneered at Abra.

“Just two…” snickered Abra.

Nora: That reply doesn’t work because they’re not your “last” words. We wish they were, but they aren’t.

Dementia ordered Reflect-Shot to squash him, and right when its arms began to swiftly close in, “Abra-Kadabra…!” shouted Abra followed by a huge crash and the glass on the mirror arms shattered. “AAH…!” roared Dementia as she braced herself from the bombarding glass shards.’

Cornelia: And the fact that the back of the mirror monster was exposed didn’t even play into Abra’s plan? It really says a lot about how poorly Mykan thinks of his characters that he keeps pitting them against these jokes he calls villains. I mean seriously, it doesn’t imply a lot of faith in the characters to handle a real threat.

The monsters arms were badly damaged, because once again, Abra had eluded it causing it to smash its own arms, and as it harmed whatever reflections were in its sights, that included itself.

Shepard: That sounds like a load of rubbish. It harms whatever reflections it has in its sights? Shouldn’t it be killing everyone then?

“This can’t be…!” shouted Dementia. Then suddenly, the monster was whammed from its backside and was crashing right down upon Dementia. “YAAHH…!” she flew up in the air just in time as her monster crashed on the ground hard.

It was Lightning who was right all the time to hit it from in back. “Looks like your plan backfired, Dementia.” Krysta called up “Do it, Lightning!”

Nora: I think that’s the first time the bonehead did something useful. Also no, the plan didn’t backfire. It was just really stupid.

“You got it…” Lightning smirked and called for the Rainbow Rod. “Rainbow Rod…Come to me!” and his magical wand appeared. “Hope no one’s superstitious. That’s a pretty big mirror I’m about to break.”

Cornelia: I don’t think I’ve heard someone mention that breaking mirrors causes seven years of bad luck for ages until I read this story. And since when was size a factor?

“No…! You can’t…!” shouted Dementia, but Lightning was already concentrating, and the rod began to glow…

Shepard: Yes, he does a little chant.

The monster was hit, and the magic dissolved…

WHAAAOM!

WHAAAOM!

Nora: And for some reason that sound effect plays twice. Like always.

All Dementia could do was screech and whine as she vanished and was gone, but she vowed to be back!

Cornelia: Even the narration is getting in on the “I’ll be back Samurai, you’ll see!”

Lightning and Krysta were relieved that she was gone, and that’s when Abra appeared alongside them as if from nowhere, and was applauding for them both. “Truly a magnificent performance.” He complimented.

Shepard: No. It was mediocre at best. Mediocre I say.

Lightning and Krysta were amazed at how Abra was okay. “How did you do all that?” Krysta asked.

Abra only chuckled, “My dear, Krysta- a good magician never reveals his secrets.”

Krysta and Lightning merely sighed.

Nora: That only works in real life because, AGAIN, real-life magicians are illusionists. They use slight of hand and misdirections to make their tricks work. All of Abra’s tricks can be explained away by him “being magic.” There’s no secret to it. He knows a spell that lets him do bullshit. Could this be anymore shallow?

Later that night, Abra was given his surprise, and so was the rest of the town.

Cookie Dough’s restaurant was already popular, and Abra was given a place for a permanent gig where he could perform shows while everyone was treated to a lovely dinner.

Cornelia: I fail to see how this gets around the problem he was having earlier about Titan’s attacks interrupting his shows. Also why didn’t Cookie Dough come up with this earlier?

This way, even more customers would flock in for the food, and the show, and Abra was entitled to a fair share of money which would get him back on track.

Shepard: Entitled? Yes, that tends to be how things work. You pay people for doing jobs. Spirits, “entitled” makes it sound like he should be getting paid but isn’t.

Abra was quite a hit and the crowds just admired his talent. So did Lightning and Krysta, who were sadly forced to watch from the kitchen as they scrubbed extra dishes. “This part of the show I’m not really enjoying.” Lightning groaned.

Nora: Wait, why are they washing dishes? And now that I think about it, how is this supposed to bring in more customers when Cookie Dough was already filling the house up?

Shepard: The author said “Happy ending now,” our logic has no place in his fantasies, it seems.

Krysta agreed, and she was only drying dishes. “Well… at least we helped Abra out. Look how happy he is.”

Nora: Helped him out? You didn’t do shit! Cookie Dough was the one who gave him a new job!

Lightning and Krysta watched the show go on through the kitchen doors behind them, and Lightning agreed that Abra was doing great. They also still were pretty curious at how he performed his tricks, but figured it best not to after all.

Cornelia: That last sentence couldn’t be anymore mangled. Also they decided to not figure it out for no reason really. I guess Mykan dislikes his characters going out of their little boxes.

(In Grand Ruler’s Palace)

Grand Ruler: “Well, it seems everything worked out fine for everyone today. Abra found ways to entertain and even help others with his skills and talent. That is something we all can do. Many talents and skills can be used for all sort of purposes, some even do more than one, or even several. There are usually other options, alternatives ways, and different methods to deal with problems. Just remember that sometimes the obvious choice is the wrong choice, and the right path is not the easy one.”

Nora: How does that connect to what happened in this chapter in even the most minute of ways? Abra’s problems were that he couldn’t get money by doing his magic shows. So he … did his magic shows somewhere else. I don’t see the “other options” you’re talking about here. Unless this is directed at Lightning for constantly trying to headbutt his problems to death, in which case, too little too late.

“See you all next time, and keep on believing!”

Cornelia: We’re never gonna understand what to believe in are we?

Nora: That would require thought on Mykan’s part.

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20 Comments on “1325: My Little Unicorn: Magic is Believing (That still means nothing) Chapter 7”

  1. AdmiralSakai says:

    After just one bite of those warm fluffy flapjacks, Lightning and Krysta, as well as the other customers all felt lighter than are and warm inside.

    Shepard: Lighter than are? Goeth? Help?

    They felt PG-13?

  2. SuperFeatherYoshi says:

    Mykan, a man in his twenties, feels the need to remind his readers that there are multiple ways of solving the same problem.

    How did he survive this long in the real world again? You’d think he would have died from banging his head against a locked door by now.

  3. AdmiralSakai says:

    Mysteriously simply scoffed, “If memory serves me correctly, I actually succeeded in please Titan while the two of you returned empty handed.”

    Cornelia: Yes but your method of doing so was jaw droppingly forced, so don’t start bragging yet.

    I also don’t think that’s true. Dementia also brought him that fragment of Lightning’s energy last chapter, didn’t she?

  4. AdmiralSakai says:

    “If only there some way I could really bring my act up. Get better performances.

    Well, they do make these little blue pills…

  5. Delta XIII says:

    Goeth: I punched in the variables to try and figure out what “are” was and what its weight and density is. My computer is now flipping me off. I should’ve known giving it that arm was a bad idea. *Rip*

    So that’s where my left arm went!

    Now, would you kindly give it back?

  6. The Crowbar says:

    A few of the customers asked for his autograph, which he was only too obliged to give.

    Or what, he’ll be arrested?

  7. TacoMagic says:

    That’s when Lightning and Krysta realized the full house

    The first step to realizing a full house is the realization of self. Once your one, true self is fully realized, your house will fill.

  8. TacoMagic says:

    Suddenly, everyone in the place began to scream followed by the clattering of dishes. Lightning and Krysta immediately ran out to see, “Dementia…!”

    Nora: Suddenly!

    And from… the dining room.

  9. TacoMagic says:

    Her monster was a giant mirror, if the reflection of anything or anyone was hit on its very special surface, the real thing would suffer the attack. In other words, you’d only be attacking yourself instead of the monster. Lightning and Krysta felt they were in big trouble,

    I know! Everyone, start punching yourselves in the face! And somebody go get some hammers so you can really do damage to yourselves it.

  10. TacoMagic says:

    “You got it…” Lightning smirked and called for the Rainbow Rod.

    *A rainbow colored gong streaks through the lobby*

    Huh, I guess that means Nyan Gong’s interview went well.

  11. TacoMagic says:

    Many talents and skills can be used for all sort of purposes, some even do more than one, or even several.

    *Agent SmithForge storms into the room*

    Whiskey? I promise only the bottom half is poisoned this time.

    “Well… sure. To be honest, the poison gives it a nice tangy finish.”

    • TacoMagic says:

      There are usually other options, alternatives ways, and different methods to deal with problems.

      *SmithForge rattles his glass* “Need a refill over here before the poison kicks in.”


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